Issues of Honor
by noctisxsol
Summary: The real reason Jaune never trained to be a hunter was that he was too busy resisting the temptation to be a playboy. Who thought that raising a boy with seven attractive, clingy, demanding, adopted sisters would result in a well-adjusted young man? Another Jaune vs the Forces of Harem story.
1. Poor Jaune

**Restoring the Family Honor**

Chapter 1; How Far we have Fallen

The real reason Jaune never trained to be a hunter is that he was busy fighting the temptation to be a playboy. It's Jaune vs. his imagined Harem. AU, Some crack.

 **Disclaimer; I don't own RWBY and this is total AU. Enjoy the ride, check author's note at the end for concerns, and kindly leave a review.**

 **This is told primarily from Jaune's perspective, and he is not the most reliable narrator. Other perspectives will be equally unreliable.**

-Honor-

Jaune Arc let the cold water continually run over him, closing himself off from the rest of the party being celebrated a few feet away. He didn't want to cut himself off, but the meditation was necessary for his sanity.

" _Inhale… Exhale"_

He cracked open one eye to check the situation. Bad idea. His adoptive sisters had started a splash fight. It must have been his uncle who had somehow convinced all of them to wear primarily white swimsuits. Most of them were faunus, and none had any reservations against playing dirty. All of them were soaked. The results were far too tantalizing for the fifteen-year-old boy. He almost wished it wasn't a private pool so that there would be some punks he could beat up for ogling his sisters to distract himself from ogling them himself.

His closed his eye again. They were his sisters, no matter what blood or his uncle or the girls or their faunus traits or even his own libido said. He refused to be like his uncle, who was undoubtedly using this whole situation as fodder for his books. He wasn't going to give the man the pleasure of the romance he was obviously trying to force by constantly bringing home the beautiful girls that were his age and leaving the poor boy as the only outlet for their interests. Even if they were adopted it still counts as incest. At least he hoped. Otherwise he'd need something else to tell his libido. The incest excuse was already wearing thin and most of the girls seemed to like the idea of the brother role-

" _No. Calm… Inhale… Exhale."_

When Jaune was younger, he used to like Uncle Jirai. The man gave out advice, presents, and stories freely, and always brought along playmates for the boy. He seemed great when you only saw him a few times a year; the man's faults didn't come out at family gatherings.

Then Jaune's parents were killed by Grimm, and he was sent to live with his uncle full time. At the fragile age of six, he was introduced to a drastically different life.

Jirai was already moderately famous; Headmaster of Signal, acclaimed writer and director, play-boy philanthropist, but a reputation as a bit slow in the head. But the truth was far more sinister. He was a genius, but more than that he was a master of manipulation. The public saw only what he wanted them to see, and never understood the true reasons behind them. No one ever saw the villainy lurking behind that socially awkward smile.

The man was a megalomaniac! A man obsessed with himself and with a side obsession of furthering the family name of Arc. But he does it in the most shameful ways possible! The halls of Signal were decorated like a gaudy museum to the Arcs, the shame! He spent his time at dances and charity events instead of going out and killing Grimm, the villain. And the poor orphans that he took in always stuck around to help further the Arc line. His "sisters" were seven such orphans that the man surely adopted for no other reason than to raise as the ultimate examples of what the Arcs can contribute to peace, and also to subject Jaune to endless amounts of teasing, flirting and tests to his self-control.

It was disgusting. Well, everything except the parts about his sisters, they were just unfairly beautiful. And most of the kids that Uncle Jirai housed were actually pretty cool. And the food at the events was pretty good, even if he didn't know what he was supposed to do and always ended up being tossed from dance to dance between his sisters. And it was actually kind of cool seeing their family history on the walls.

But the Arcs were supposed to be warriors, Heroes! His uncle should have been a hunter, a knight, or at the very least join the police! Security guard? Whatever, there should have been no place in their legacy for a puppet-master.

The worst part was how well the bastard pulled everything off. The general public praised him as a hero, and his enemies sneered at his soft-heartedness. The children were delighted to have purpose as servants and consistently refused any offer to go elsewhere. Half of Remnant was eating out of his hand without realizing that they had been tamed.

Disgusting. Disgraceful. Unworthy.

" _No, bad Jaune! Calm. Inhale- Oh Crap! Water up the nose! Inhaled water! This was not a good idea!"_

Jaune burst forth from under the waterfall, hacking and coughing. This immediately attracted the attention of his sisters and one ran up to him. She could only be identified as a spider faunus by the eye-like marks on her forehead or the bulge of the spinnerets on her wrists. _"Cherri; she IS training to be a doctor. Makes sense she'd jump to help."_

The siblings stared into each other's eyes, unsaid words passing between them. Their heads inched closer together. Jaune broke eye contact. Cherri drove a fist into his gut, forcing both breath and water out of him, before seizing his head and giving him mouth to mouth. With an awful lot of tongue.

" _No! Bad Jaune! Down boy!"_

When his sister pulled away for breath, Jaune quickly averted his eyes again lest he fall into temptation. He quickly found his uncle lounging at one of the pool chairs and giggling as he wrote furiously. Suddenly, everything became crystal clear. He was just being paranoid because of the constant mixing of aggressions and affections from his step-sisters. None of this situation was his uncle's doing, the poor man was constantly battered in his own romantic attempts. The only things he had right was the need to restore the Arc honor and the fact that he cannot get too close to any of his beautiful but crazy step sisters for the sake of his own sanity and safety.

He firmly ignored the part of his brain that wanted to call them kinky. Hormones make fools of even the best men.

Of course, not getting any experience with the only females that he had regular contact with meant relying on his uncle's advice when he was finally able to escape. But surely his sisters were the only confusing and crazy girls he would meet; there can't be that many in the world that he can't find at least one normal cute girl to date.

Unbeknownst to him, what Jirai was writing was not ideas for his books. Instead it was a letter to his superior Ozpin. The message contained only four words.

"All according to Plan."

-Two Years Later-

Jaune stared down at the letter in his hand. An official acceptance letter to the prestigious Beacon Academy, birthplace of heroes. He was going to be a real hero! Sure to get accepted he had to sneak into his uncle's office, forge a couple signatures, and pretend his uncle's hunting lessons were for Grimm not women, but it was worth it in the end. Now he just had to pack his things and keep his uncle from learning about so he wouldn't have time to enact any crazy schemes.

A hand landed on his shoulder and his blood froze. _"Please don't be her, please don't be her, please don't be her!"_

"Now what has my adorable little guinea pig got? Is it a plan to run away without telling me? You should know better after what happened last time."

His face slowly drained of color as she linked her arms around his chest and settled her chin to peek over his shoulder. _"Why, Why, WHY? I was almost free! Now I'll never escape! Why Oum? Why do you want me to suffer at the hands of these fallen angels?"_

"You applied to Beacon and you didn't tell us? Naughty, naughty." Her hands released around him, but left a trail of sticky silk that she looped around him. "I guess it's fortunate that I kept the letter offering me a job working in the Beacon infirmary then. I couldn't bear the thought of my favorite toy left alone to whims of some other beautiful, genius, considerate doctor; she might try to steal you away from me!"

Jaune barely held back a whimper as he was turned around. Cherri was one of the most active of his sisters in slowly driving him insane. Sure he was glad to cook for them, give them his opinion on their clothes, give massages to relieve stress, help with their studies, be a shoulder to cry on, defend them against anyone that might hurt them, and cuddle with them to help them sleep, but that didn't mean he had no urges of his own! _"Actually, thinking of everything I do for the seven of them combined… I'm their pet, aren't I? Once I get to beacon, I need to make some guy friends and set them up as soon as possible."_

"Now, how do I look?" She gave a spin to show off her open doctor's coat and the red dress she wore underneath. She was only two years older than him but was already a certified doctor and his personal physician. "Is this enough to keep your attention?" She gave a teasing wink and leaned over to test for a reaction.

He was stiff as a board. All his muscles had tensed while his brain worked futilely to try to find a way out of the situation.

And of course, none of this escaped the spider faunus' attention. "So tense." She was cooing in his ear. He prayed to Oum for salvation, but was pretty sure that he was forsaken. "I have a muscle relaxant that needs to be tested. Why don't you try it? You'd never refuse; you're such a helpful guinea pig. Nurse Cream, to the Lab!"

Before the (un)fortunate boy had a chance to protest, the aforementioned nurse filled his vision. He was able to make out her two-toned hair before she caught him in a bear hug that acquainted his spine to her chest. There were two things to be thankful for in that situation. One was that everything about Cream's body was soft. The second was the healing side effect of her semblance that meant he would still be able to walk after this if his mind was still intact.

Heavy footfalls coming around the corner signaled Jaune's only hope of salvation. Uncle Jirai popped his head around the corner and took a second to take in the situation. Jaune mouthed pleas for help. They went largely ignored.

"Girls, what are you doing to Jaune?"

Cream took one hand off of his back (still somehow keeping the same amount of pressure) and waved to the man, full of false innocence. "We're gonna play doctor with Big Brother!"

Jirai blinked once more before slowly backing away. He always bought the innocent act from Cream. She was the youngest, only sixteen, but she was easily blatant with her advances. _"Ever since she unlocked her semblance and bonded to me, there hasn't been a day she hasn't molested me. All in the name of healing me or stocking up on my aura. How does she do that anyway? My aura's still locked! Stupid symbiotic semblance giving sexy phsycho's excuses for assault. Even if her healing aura feels really good…"_

Cherri took the opportunity of his crushed lungs to push forward with her plans. "I'll just go through the disclaimers, if you disagree with any part just speak up. Now the experimental drug I'm going to give you will put you in a very relaxed state, both mentally and physically. Side effects may include; temporary paralysis, permanent paralysis, drowsiness, narcolepsy, post-hypnotic suggestions, unexplained bruises, spontaneous desire for attractive doctors, loss of memory, loss of control, loss of virginity, loss of sanity, loss of sleep, loss of limb, and extreme thirst. No objections? Good. Then I just need your opinion on what clothes for you to wake up in. Do you want it to be my clothes, or the sexy bunny outfit? Or you could go naked. Either way, your clothes are going to be traded for favors. Anything to add, Nurse Cream?"

"What about that butler outfit? I liked that one, it came with jacket, tie, and thong. I wanted to get a massage while he wore that."

"Jaune hasn't gotten around to fixing it yet, we keep interrupting him."

"Oh well, bunny massage it is. Unless Jaune wants to break free and ravage us until we're his loyal pets, I'd be okay with that." She let her hand drift down to his butt. "I mean, I would not mind serving this fine ass."

Jaune would have sighed if he could get any breath in his lungs. Thankfully Cream's aura was healing any physical damage, but the mental pressure was ever increasing. _"Just think of this as training. Aura flows from the soul, so having a stronger soul must mean stronger aura, right? I can't think of anything that would make for a stronger soul than having to live every day resisting temptation like this. But seriously, what was Jirai thinking? Was he trying to set me up for this? All the girls are taught by tutors, and he doesn't allow any other boys near any of the girls. It's only natural that they turn to the only option. Then he still feels the need to make me learn and practice things like massage and cooking to 'get girls'. Then there was the body sculpting, now I can't even walk past them without each of them finding something to drool over. And if this was intentional, why didn't he choose normal, sane girls?"_ a sense of weightlessness overtook him for a second as he was tossed into the air, before landing on an examination table and Cream taking a seat on his waist. _"I just need to survive and hold out long enough to get to Beacon. Then I'll have a team that can run interference and help save me from crazy girls."_

Meanwhile, Ozpin sat in his office examining the profiles of the incoming students. Even though the teams and pairings had the appearance of being random or controlled by the students, the truth was the exact opposite. Every detail was meticulously prepared to achieve the optimal result, and the students never suspected a thing. Put four males on the same team to give the needed support and frustration to play the bully. Arrange the dorm rooms to strand his champion in a sea of estrogen. Offer the illusion of male support with the pair of orphan girls from Kuroyomi.

A report pinged onto the headmaster's scroll from one of his most trusted agents. A smile bloomed across his face. "All according to Plan. Soon you will join us, young Arc, and then the truths of this world will become clear. Mwha ha ha ha Mwhahahaha MWHA-"

A knock on the door interrupted his laughter. Glynda let herself in before he had time to finish hiding his shameful habit and grabbed one of the files. After a brief perusal she set it down. She stared down the headmaster until he averted his eyes. "Ozpin, what did I say about interfering with the love lives of students?"

"Don't manipulate people into relationships just because I'm bored. But this is important! There's a reason!"

"And what is this supposed good reason?"

"It is necessary to answer THE question. The question every man has asked himself sometime in his life! How do you gather and keep a harem?"

"…I'm not certain you're lying and I'm not certain I don't want you to be. I'm confiscating the coffee maker though."

Ozpin watched as his deputy left the office before sending a message to make sure that the boy would bring a coffee maker. "Yesss. Sooon. MWHA-" the sound of breaking glass signaled the destruction of an innocent coffee pot. The headmaster let a single tear fall. "I'm sorry my friend. Your sacrifice will be remembered. I swear on that boy's harem that I will make sure your dream comes to fruition. When that maid café goes up, it will be in your honor!"

-End-

I'm not certain if I'm going to continue this, but it was getting in the way of writing other stories so I may as well get it out. Yes, I know I'm a terrible author with inconsistent schedule that doesn't update what he promised. Hopefully this will tide you over until I finish what I said I would. Plus, what are you really going to do? Refuse to favorite the story? Send me money so I have something to lose for not keeping my promise? I take .

Onto the story. Honestly, this story started as something that was supposed to be serious. Jaune wanted to restore the arc honor after his father abandoned the legacy. It would explain why Jaune had no training and was completely ignorant of hunter stuff. But that was just too bland and was more of a cannon theory than an idea for a story. So rather than just not being a hunter, Jaune's father became a manipulative bastard. Of course, if he's manipulative, then either the old man sucks and everyone hates him for it, or is a master and no one but Jaune realizes that it's happening. The later fits my writing style more. Of course, saying your dad is secretly a master manipulative bastard and no one else can see it makes you sound rather paranoid. And thus, the idea of poor Jaune going slightly bonkers after being constantly beset by his seven sisters was born.

In the end, it became a story of what Jaune was really running away from when he joined Beacon. Poor guy is a chew toy.


	2. Gynophobia Part 1

**Restoring the Family Honor**

Chapter 2; In this situation, Gynophobia is Understandable

The real reason Jaune never trained to be a hunter is that he was busy fighting the temptation to be a playboy. It's Jaune vs. his imagined Harem. AU, Some crack.

 **Disclaimer; I don't own RWBY and this is total AU. Enjoy the ride, check author's note at the end for concerns, and kindly leave a review.**

 **This is told primarily from Jaune's perspective, and he is not the most reliable narrator. Other perspectives will likely be equally unreliable.**

-Honor-

Jaune felt terrible. For the first time in his life, he had outright lied to his family; telling them that the airship to Beacon Academy was for students only. Really, it was for students and any staff that still needed to get on campus, which inconveniently now included all seven of his sisters in one way or another.

His stomach lurched. He had hoped so earnestly that going away to Beacon would be a fresh start, a new beginning to his legacy, un-ruled by the seven pagan goddesses that dominated his life. After Cherri uncovered his plan, he had to tell the whole family at the dinner table. And by Oum's spiteful will, all seven of them had received varying job offers from Beacon within the last two weeks. There was obviously a conspiracy to either kill him or turn him into a massive pervert, which would swiftly and inevitably lead to suicide via exhaustion. Such sweet and pleasurable exhaustion…

Now there was some burning in his throat. Going to have to take care of that; focusing on his sisters wasn't helping like he thought it would. Motion sickness sucks.

Thus our intrepid universal chew toy set off to acquire some assistance of the female variety. Optimal help would be finding some girl to let him use her lap as a pillow, but he just got away from women who were far too eager for him to do that, and he was not in a hurry to find more.

Really, he just needed a girl willing to let him braid her hair. Or give a massage. Or dance with him. Or really anything that would focus his attention onto a girl, up to and including that special dance where it's just him on stage and his clothes somehow disappear. But braiding is the one that any random girl is the most likely to agree to.

His salvation was delivered to him in the form of a red-cloaked girl. She was just spit out of a crowd of beacon students and stumbled into him.

It seemed for the first time that Oum was rewarding him for his perseverance and dedication to a noble goal. Deciding to take the offered gift, he placed a hand on the girl's shoulder.

She whipped around and flailed her arms in a motion that was supposed to somehow resemble karate. Suffice to say, it did not, but it did make her look extra adorable. He put up his hands in mock surrender and gave the "special smile reserved for the company of pretty girls and beautiful ladies", Trademark Jirai Entertainment Industries.

As skeptical as he was of the smile (It always seemed to magnetically attract his sisters, that is to say, trouble) it must have done something since she put down her hands and smiled back. Phase one of plan "Don't throw up" is a success! Now onto the talking part…

"If I help you, will you let me braid your hair?" _"Real smooth, Jaune Arc, Real smooth. Thousands of hours of tutoring and practice with much more intimidating girls, and the first chance you get to talk to a girl that isn't crazy, and you immediately come off sounding weird."_

"What?"

" _Uh-oh, here comes a rant_."

"How did you know I needed help finding my sister? Thank you! Everyone is taller than me because I skipped two years and I don't have any friends and…"

" _She's going to cry! Please don't cry! I do stupid things when girls cry! I just barely escaped ruining my image forever with the first thing I said, don't make this harder!"_ "Jaune Arc could never fail to help someone in need! But… I'll need some help myself after. I get motion sick and need something to focus my attention, so after we find your sister-

"Ruby Rose! There you are!" A blonde beauty pushed through the crowd and caught the red girl in a tight hug.

" _Sure, take away my moment of glory. Why do you hate me Oum?"_

"Ohh, I'm so happy my baby sister gets to go to Beacon with me! This is the Best Day Ever!"

Jaune felt such sympathy for the younger sister. He knew the powers of sister-hugs. They are impossible to escape and lethal in large doses. The poor girl just barely managed to croak out a plea to stop.

Of course, once she had finished the hug, her attention turned to the blonde man. By the time he realized the danger, it was too late to escape. "And who's this? Ruby, did you make a friend?" The death threat that accompanied the words went unsaid, but it was expressed quite clearly in her eyes.

"This is Jaune! He was going to help me look for you since he's tall!

" _Yes. That's good. Nothing about the weird braiding request. I'm just a nice guy, and since she found her sister, I'll just quietly sneak away and find a different girl to help, 'cuz I'm just a harmless nice guy."_

"Then he's going to braid my hair!"

" _Aaaand now I sound like a creep. Quick, make myself seem like a harmless socially inept dork!"_ "Yeah, I was in a bit of a _hairy_ situation. I get sick if I'm not focusing on something, so your sister _Rose_ to the occasion. Don't worry, I wasn't going to take advantage of her like she was a _Rube-y._ " _"Good job. Thousands of hours learning how to be suave and talk to girl, and being an awkward dork still comes naturally. Good to know that Jirai wasted his time."_

The blonde girl glared at him intensely for a second before bursting out in hearty guffaws. She was quite good at faking laughter over terrible jokes it seemed. Before he could enact his escape plan, she caught his head under her arm. "Thanks for helping my sister, Hair Knight." Great, his time at beacon will now be defined by a spur of the moment bad pun. "You can take your noble reward in a second, I just have one question." She leaned in and whispered in his ear. "Are you gay?"

His mind way already in overdrive trying to ignore the far too pleasant feeling of the young woman squishing herself against him, and the question caught him off guard. He had to take a few seconds and let his brain reboot.

Of course, she continued to speak in that time. "I mean, you offer to help a cute girl and the reward you ask for is braiding her hair? Most straight guys would use that as an in to reach the hair down there, not the stuff up top. Though, they do say that gays are better at those girly things, too. It's okay if you are, just tell me. I definitely wouldn't mind having a gay best friend around. I'll let Ruby know you're harmless and that she doesn't have to dress up when you come over to visit her..."

Jaune's brain finally caught up a good thirty seconds after she asked the question. "Most definitely straight! And even if I was gay, you'd probably be making me reconsider right now." _"I mean, you'd only have to reach down to find your proof. Why are all the crazy ones so hot?"_

A cocky smile graced her lips as she released him. "Damn Straight!"

Jaune actually had a witty reply ready for that one, but Ruby interrupted before he could redeem his image. "Yaaaang! Stop stealing my friends! You promised you wouldn't when you graduated Signal!"

"What? You'd rather get your hair braided by a boy you just met than _Yang_ out with your sister? I'm so proud! My little Ruby is all grown up! Now listen, you have to make sure you're always on top. You can never trust a guy to keep a good rhythm if you let him take full control. Also, keep Crescent Rose nearby in case he does anything you don't like, and always use protection."

"Yaaang!" the younger sister's face was as red as her cloak. "He's just going to braid my hair to avoid airsickness! He's not like the boys at Signal that you used to hang around with."

The addition of that one little detail made the sister's eyes narrow. "What kind of a solution is braiding? That doesn't make sense. If you asked to use her lap as a pillow, I'd understand, but…"

" _And now I'm back to near execution_." "It doesn't have to be braiding, just something to focus my attention! Would you rather I asked to give her a massage? Or actually put my head on her lap?"

The woman's bracelets expanded into gauntlets and she stared down the young Arc. When he didn't cower, she gave a huff and crossed her arms on her chest. It was obviously a test. Jaune moved his eyes to stare directly at the girl's eyes. He refused to look away, even though he really wanted to… _"No, Bad hormones! I thought you learned your lesson! Do we need to find a waterfall again?"_ a jolt of turbulence broke his concentration and he was forced to block out the view of those golden valleys with his hands clasped together.

The action made a light of realization gleam in the woman's eyes. "Oh, I get it! You're a monk! Resist the temptations of the flesh and all that; no wonder you're so awkward. Alright, I'll let you be Ruby's friend." Ruby's pout at her sister's interference went largely ignored. "And you know, if you ever feel like you're going to fall into temptation, I'll be a friend and make sure you never have to worry about that at all." The sound of a can being crushed punctuated her kind offer.

" _How does she manage to make those threats while still sounding flirty? And why do I always end up surrounded by hot girls that are too crazy to touch?"_

"And after you're done with her, I want a massage. You wouldn't believe how sore my shoulders get. Don't worry about your vows, I'll take any poking as a compliment."

" _Why Oum? Was I super annoying in my past life or something? Why couldn't you have just let me flounder around socially rather than being drowned in girls that want to kill me?"_

-Beacon Academy-

"You have a little crown now! It's so cute! I'm going to be beating boys away!" Why did she sound so happy about that?

"Yaang! You're scaring all the new weapons away!" Wait, what?

"Ruby, you have to meet new people, you can't just ogle their weapons." Something must be wrong with both of them.

"But their weapons are the best part! They have more personality and never try to use you just to get closer to your sister." Uh-oh, she has issues. It's okay, just carefully walk away while they're standing still and having their conversation, you just didn't want to be late for the speech.

"Yeah, well, about that… IhavesomethingstodowithsomefriendsfromSignal! Seeya,Bye!"

" _Okay that's my cue to leave Ruby to make her own friends. Just walk-"_

"I expect you to take care of my sister, _Arc_ olyte, or Oum's wrath will have to wait for me to finish mine!"

" _Damn. Not again."_

With that, the blonde girl was gone, leaving Jaune and Ruby to awkwardly figure out what to do.

"Sooo, do you get any special paladin powers for being a monk and a hunter? Like, a glowing sword, or healing spell? Oh! Can you get Oum to smite whoever's always stealing from my cookie jar?"

"Ruby, I'm pretty sure any weapon can glow if you put aura into it." _"Why didn't I just become a monk? That would have been so much better! Maybe it isn't too late to atone for whatever I did wrong… How messed up has my life gotten that I'm seriously considering a vow of chastity at seventeen?"_

"So that's a yes, then! Let me see it, Let me see it!"

He barely managed to draw his sword before it was snatched out of his hand by the hyper-active girl.

"Oooo, I'm so exited! This is one of the famous Arc swords! Seven thousand layers of high yield steel, titanium and nanocarbon, twisted and braided to leave the signature arcs on the blade, perfectly crafted to create high speed vibrations when fed aura! This thing has been around so many battles that it practically has its own aura!"

" _A major weapon nut… It's okay, everyone has their quirks. It could be worse, at least it's a helpful one. So long as it within reason- Wait, is she cuddling it?"_

"Who's a good sword? You're a good sword! Ohh, yes you are! Yes you are!"

" _Okay, so it's a bit out of hand. She's still a nice quirky girl, perfect friend material. I'll just make sure to help her make some more friends to distribute the load. So long as she doesn't get clingy or try to go romantic- Wait, where did that scythe come from?"_

"Meet Crescent Rose, isn't she adorable? You think so too? Rose thinks you're awesome too! Don't they look so cute together, Jaune?"

" _Don't say yes, whatever you do don't say yes. If you do then there is no escape. Do you really want to be relaxing on the couch, then suddenly a cold scythe is cuddling into your side?"_ "Yeah, they should get together." _"Damn it, Mouth! I will have you Court Marshalled!"_

"You're Right! They should be Dating!"

" _Why do I get the impression that this girl didn't have any dolls growing up? And why am I now imagining her using her weapons as dolls? AND WHY DOES IT LOOK SO DAMNED ADORABLE! I JUST WANT TO PICK HER UP AND HUG HER AND CUDDLE HER!... DAMN IT IMAGINATION, YOU HAVE BETRAYED MEEEEEE!"_

"Whoosh, whoosh. Slice, slice. Hehe. Crocea Mors is showing off for Crescent Rose!"

"Whoah, Ruby, watch where you swinging-"

"My Dust!" Because luck would have it no other way, Ruby had somehow managed to slice open every single case on a passing trolley.

" _And of course the dust would belong to Schnee Heiress, because Oum hates me. I can only hope she doesn't recognize me…"_

The chill of ice trapping his legs made him toss that hope onto the mountain of other things that were too good to be true.

"And Where do You think You're going, Idiot?"

" _And she's still a Tsundere. You can practically hear the capitalization on that. Okay, just flirt with her and she'll leave in a huff like always. Make sure it's bad, stab her issues; that should make her mad. A mad Weiss doesn't try to do things."_ "Good morning, Snow Angel. Do you still need to be Daddy's perfect ice sculpture or will you let me in? You don't have to be alone, you know." The ice rose to encase his chest. Her face was red. _"Oh crap, did I mess up messing up? Did I come off as too caring, I thought that cheesy nickname was perfect for driving her off! Why are you blushing?! You're supposed to be storming off by now!"_

"Well, some of us have an image to uphold. What would you ancestors think, seeing you give one of their heirlooms to be used as a toy for a child?"

" _Critical hit. Right to the honor. Sometimes it really does seem that she's the only one who understands me. Maybe it wouldn't be too bad to give her a chance."_

"Your uncle's scandals have already dragged the Arc name through the mud by associating it with his filth and womanizing, and I won't let you tarnish the reputation of our largest trading partner with your own perversions!"

" _And then she keeps talking and I realize she's so far off the mark…"_

"You didn't even have the decency to chase after a woman who might have been able to take your perversity. No, instead you went for a girl-"

" _I need to cut her off before Yang catches wind of this and kills me. Terrible flirting to the next level, then. Get her actually mad this time."_ "She reminded me a little of you, even if she lacks your grace. And you know my weakness to cute girls." _"The Hell was that? It was supposed to be BAD flirting, not just cheesy! At this rate, she's going to stop hating me!"_

That caught her attention and actually made her stop as red dominated her face. "I-I see. Yes, yes that would do it. That of course makes this indirectly my responsibility to correct. Jaune! I will take responsibility. You will be an honest man yet."

Confidant that she had the last word that needed to be said, Weiss strode off, leaving servants to take care of the dust and Jaune stuck in the ice.

" _She didn't hit me. That's… not a good sign… Why am I worried that a girl_ isn't _being abusive?"_ the ice chilling his flesh answered that question. _"Oh right. It's either she hits me and leaves me alone, or she follows my every move to punish me whenever I don't live up to her expectations. Or worse, tries to reward me when I do. Why don't I know any sane girls?"_

With as heavy a sigh as the ice would allow, Jaune started trying to break free. Thankfully Ruby contributed. And by that, I mean that she whacked at the _Arc_ sicle with Crescent Rose. "What was her problem? She seemed really crabby."

"Weiss? No, she's just been held to an impossible standard her whole life. To cope, she's taken to verbally flogging anyone who fails to cater to her idea of how the world should be."

"She sounds like a spoiled brat."

"She's just lonely…" _"And a tsundere, but she doesn't need to know about that."_

"So, how do you know each other? Did you get in a fight before? What's her weapon!?"

"No, no, it wasn't a fight. Her father and my uncle are business partners so we get dragged along to a lot of the same events." _"And her father is trying to arrange a marriage so the companies can merge, but that's neither here nor there. I just wish that Weiss could have stayed over there. I'm trying to get away from all the craziness that being the Arc heir brought me… And maybe get a nice, sane, normal girlfriend. At least she'll hopefully help to keep the temptation down by ruining my reputation and scaring all the girls away…"_

"What did she mean about 'your perversions'?"

" _But that won't stop the fact that now Yang is going to kill me. Eh, might be preferable. Aaand that wins the award for least comforting thought ever. I'm screwed, aren't I?"_

As the two teens made their way to the Orientation room, the servants lagged behind. They pulled out their scrolls and quickly compiled a report for their masters. As the messages left they sent a salute to the man destined to fulfill the dream of all men.

In his brightly lit corporate office, Jacques Schnee was calmly running a few numbers for the next quarter when his scroll dinged with a message. Recognizing the number as one of the men he sent to Beacon with his daughter, he gave orders for the office to be converted. In just a few minutes, the shades were drawn to cast gloom across the table, and the screen that had just displayed figures and calculations were filled with machinations and plots. The conversion to evil lair was finished as the ominous lightning effects came on and the oppressive sound of an organ filled the space.

Finally ready, he opened the message and read its contents with glee. "All according to Plan. Mwha ha ha ha ha!" The thunder crashed as the cackling continued. When the therapeutic evil laughter had finished, he strode out of the office to leave the servants to their task. "Now get this back to an office, I have a conference call with Ironwood in two minutes and it has to be spotless in there." Truly an evil man.

- **Chapter 2 End-**

 **The wonderful thing about writing with an unreliable narrator is that no one can blame you (the author) of misrepresenting a character, because it's really just the narrator misunderstanding the character. A perfect catch-all. Sadly doesn't excuse any grammar mishaps, but nothings perfectly perfect.**

 **So then, how does Jaune see the girls so far? Ruby is a cute, but a major weapons nut (It is far too easy to see her using weapons as dolls) that brings along the murderous baggage of her older sister. Yang is hot as a furnace, but also a murderous older sister that has made it her goal to make his life just as difficult as it was at home. And Weiss is a tsundere. Does anything more need to really be said? But really, she's kind of like a young Goodwitch; except instead of a crop, it's freezing you in ice and berating you.**

 **And yes, All seven of Jaune's sisters will be brought in to simultaneously make men jealous and Jaune miserable. I may do a chapter in the future that brings out their history with Jaune, or I could not and just leave everything for you to imagine. The second will probably be more fun.**


	3. Gynophobia Part 2

**Restoring the Family Honor**

Chapter 3;

The real reason Jaune never trained to be a hunter is that he was busy fighting the temptation to be a playboy. It's Jaune vs. his imagined Harem. AU, Some crack.

 **Disclaimer; I don't own RWBY and this is total AU. Enjoy the ride, check author's note at the end for concerns, and kindly leave a review.**

 **This is told primarily from Jaune's perspective, and he is not the most reliable narrator. Other perspectives will likely be equally unreliable.**

-Honor-

" _Somehow, this has become my life. I set out to become a huntsman, and fulfill our honor as a defender of the weak and savior of damsels in distress. In reality, I'm frantically trying to prevent girls from getting mad and killing me or tempting me so much that I snap and end up killing myself."_

Jaune had intended to change into his safe, concealing pajamas and go to bed early before any other girls decided to torment him, but his sisters had other ideas. They kidnapped him, stripped him down to his boxers, and were currently forcing him to participate in their crazy idea for a book-signing slash massage parlor to quote "Help relieve some stress before initiation." Sure, he was only credited with co-authorship, but that didn't mean he wanted everyone to know that he was dragged into helping his uncle with his filthy books!

But despite his protests, they went forward with their plan. The end result was him straddling the smooth and sexy back of one Blake Belladonna as she tried to receive a massage and hold an intelligent conversation about one of her favorite books.

"Oooh, that's the spot! I mean- Ummm the drawings are real, right?"

His blush was barely evident, the result of seven years of experience in this sort of situation with his sisters. Though, he was already wary of them, and this girl seemed nice, if a little quiet. "Uncle Jirai does the drawings, but I was the model for the main character, Ki. He makes a few sketches on the scene, but most are drawn from imagination and posing."

"Did" She sounded rather enthusiastic about whatever she was going to ask, but was interrupted by one of her own moans. "Did you practice any? Of the scenes? They're real, right?"

"It's kind of awkward to admit, but that whole book is almost entirely made up of events from my life. Everything in there happened to me… but certain instances were exaggerated." _"She's such a nice girl! Please don't turn out to be some kind of deviant! Please just let one girl turn out to be sane and well adjusted…"_

The girl seemed to gain a light in her eyes. This conversation was obviously going her way. Either that or she just really liked the massage. Was that a purr? "So that mission to the Schnee Mines in volume three really happened the way it was written."

" _Thank goodness, it's a completely normal thing._ " "Yeah, my sister Cherri just wanted help heal some of the protesters from back when the White Fang was just starting to turn to violence. She got dragged into what was supposed to be a rescue mission-"

"But it was really meant to sabotage the mines, I know. And Ki threw away his chance to escape with his sister to save Neko from a cave-in. But she turned out to be a member of the Fang and captured him when he was weak from digging her out. I was actually wondering about the interrogation after."

" _Something seems off about- No! Don't jump to conclusions!"_

"In the book, it said that you started having feelings for Neko halfway through interrogation, and you wanted to convince her to come with you when you left." She seemed kind of exited. That was a bad sign by this point. "Do you still feel the same way?"

" _Why is she asking- Wait… the book said that I was passed out when I was captured. The only way she would know… No way… of all the possible coincidences…"_ Everything fell into place. She was there back then. "Blake? Is that really you? Did you leave the Fang? When?"

With force that spoke of far too much eagerness, she flipped him over so that she was the one straddling him, and bound his hands with a ribbon. " _Please don't turn into a recreation of the bondage semi-rape semi-cuddling semi-seduction semi-interrogation thing from chapter 23. It was awkward enough the way it really happened without Uncle's exaggerations."_

"I just lost my partner to his own fanaticism, and I'm not going to let you go. I'm taking your offer. I'm starting a new life. You'll stay with me, right?"

" _How can she be so cute while sitting on top of me and basically holding me hostage to be her partner? I blame the ears. Curse my weakness to cute faunus."_ "I will never abandon you, but you'll have to keep me from doing anything too stupid, okay?"

She leaned down with a smile on her face. And proceeded to bind him with more ribbon. She was far too good at it. "You don't actually get a choice, but it's nice that you're willing. I'll make sure you enjoy it then."

" _Okay, she has some trust issues… and is into bondage… that first one kind of makes sense. I mean, she did just leave behind what was her life for almost a decade after her partner went crazy. She needs some time to adjust and get used to the new status quo. And since I was someone friendly from her 'past life' it makes sense she'd cling to someone familiar. If she didn't do this, she'd probably cut herself off from everyone and start obsessing over the Fang while hiding behind books instead of moving on. This is moderately preferable. That still doesn't make this easier. Did she really need to frame my crotch that well? Watch the claws! Please don't nuzzle there! Wait, did my sisters set all this up just to have this happen?"_

Seven pairs of eyes watched as the cat faunus curled into a ball on Jaune's chest and fell asleep with a soft purr. High fives were passed around and one phrase was whispered back and forth.

"All according to Plan!"

-Next Morning-

" _I take back what I said last night, I'd prefer it if she had cut herself off from people and retreated into her books."_ When Jaune woke up that morning, Blake was already gone and he was free from his bindings. He was able to get up and prepared without her leaping at him even though he hadn't contacted her in the last five minutes, so that would seem to be a point in her favor. But she left him with one little souvenir.

A collar. Already on his neck. Complete with a cat bell.

He was only 80% sure that the bell was hiding some kind of tracker, but he was 100% sure that the ringing was as annoying as hell. _"Scratch one off the potential girlfriend list, reason; clingy, bondage dominatrix, and literally put a bell on me. If that doesn't point to signs of being jealous girlfriend I don't know what does. That leaves… absolutely no-one on the 'datable girls I know' list. That vow of chastity is sounding very tempting. Might as well get something out of it. Maybe then I'll get those paladin powers; bring down some divine smiting on some Grimm ass!"_

His contemplation had taken him most of the length of the hallway and right into the perilous vicinity of Weiss. Between the bell and the suspicious pile of lockers blocking half the hallway, there was no way to avoid detection and a tongue lashing. The only solution remaining is the full-frontal flirt. That is, full force flirting, not flirting with full frontal- …never mind.

" _Okay, she has another girl with her. Go in with some strong compliments, then immediately switch gears to flirting with the other girl. Once she hits me and storms off, play the distraught friend trying to fit in. Unless the other turns out to be nice, quirky, and most of all sane; then spill some secrets and go on the path of charming! I've planned this, I won't be caught off guard, let's go!"_ "Good morning Snow Angel, you look ready to crush men's hearts as well as Grimm."

Her first response was to freeze the soles of his shoes to the floor. Good sign? much less than normal at least. She did look inordinately pleased about something. "So you are able to give proper compliments. There's hope for you yet." She stepped to the side and made a gesture toward the red-head to whom she was speaking. "Meet Pyrrha Nikos, four time Mistral Regional champion, top of her class at Sanctum-"

"And the one who beat out my sister Lorelei for the Pumpkin Pete's brand deal." _"Crap, I wasn't expecting this! She's introducing me! She actually wants me to interact with her and be nice! Okay, change of plans. Rather than rain compliments, treat her like a normal girl, then Weiss will get mad that I'm not showing her the proper respect. Yeah, that'll work."_ "The name's Jaune Arc. Short, sweet, rolls off the tongue. The Ladies love it. Nice to meet ya'." _"Yes, one of Jirai's opening bar lines, that's perfect."_

"It's nice to meet you too. I'm sorry about the sponsorship, I hope your sister wasn't mad."

He gave a charming smile. The girl seemed- no. He wasn't going to jinx it. "She was devastated for about a week. Then she actually tried the stuff and spit it out as soon as it touched her tongue. Apparently, the cereal tastes like a caramel pumpkin dipped in sugar, soaked in molasses, injected with syrup, and then inflated and left to go stale. I just hope you at least enjoyed the modeling, because she would have been hating it."

She gave a polite smile. "It was fun, even if the cereal isn't that good for you."

"Then someone benefitted from it. But you looked a little uncomfortable before, what were you talking about?"

Weiss cut back into the conversation, her tone as cold as ice. "I was talking to her about potentially working as a team. I was just getting into how she should forgive you for your philandering ways and lack of respect for both your station and hers."

" _She's angry, that's a good sign. So then, onward with the flirting and lack of special treatment!"_ "Teams? Aren't they normally groups of four? In that case, if Weiss and I were on the same team, I think it would be best if Weiss took short to mid-range with her dust. I met this blonde bombshell; I mean brawler, who would make an excellent short to engaged range fighter, and the brawler's cute sister would be long range support with her Sniper rifle with the added bonus of possible short-range scythe attacks."

"Umm." Pyrrha seemed half nervous and half excited. "You didn't include me. Do you… not want me on your team?"

Jaune had to stop in surprise and blink. The girl was taking it rather hard, not being on a hypothetical team with a guy she just met. _"Does she have a fragile ego or…_ " "Not at all! I would love to have a skilled beauty like you on my team, Pyrrha! It's just that I don't really know you, or how you'd fight against Grimm. I mean, sure you're beautiful and obviously strong and skilled, but I'm not going to assume you're just the best at everything because of your celebrity status. Weiss has major social problems to make up for her stunning grace and elegance, and I would much rather not go into my problems from my upbringing. That is to say, I just want to get to know the real you better if you're going to be on my team."

Weiss cut back in with all the subtlety of a claymore. "Who would want to be on a team with you, Idiot? I'm only agreeing to join you to make sure you don't take advantage of your position!"

"I'd be willing to join his team!"

" _Should I be thanking her? She seems a little too eager. Is she really- No, Don't- Actually, after what happened last time, Yes, Jump to conclusions. She's latching on to me for very superficial reasons after barely a minute of interaction. It's either love at first sight or she's going to turn into a psychotic mess. Probably the later, and definitely will if I don't throw myself into the fire to make it the former."_

The Ice Queen seemed to be doing her best to restrain herself and instead just wrapped one of her arms around his. "Isn't that nice? Well, you don't need to trouble yourself. I'll be more than willing and able to keep this Idiot out of trouble. All. By. My. self."

" _Uh oh, the tugging is going to start, and once that starts then…_ " "Jealous, Snow Angel?" _"WHY DID YOU MAKE IT WORSE?"_

The heiress' teeth could have torn metal from how tight her jaw was clenching. "I have spent far too much time attempting to turn you into a worthy partner to see it all fall apart because a naïve girl bought into your flirting! I'm not letting her taint my training!"

Pyrrha was trying to be polite, but was obviously starting to get mad. "I was being polite and offering my support. You have no right to judge-"

"I know the Idiot, and you're acting like a love-struck fool at best or-"

"I am simply giving him a chance on his own merits, you're trying to force him to-"

"He doesn't have that luxury! We never did!"

"Ladies!" Jaune made the mistake of getting in the middle of a rising catfight. In under a second he was pinned to the wall by a spear and frozen in place. _"Yep, definitely going to be crazy. Oum, If I survive initiation, then I will take a vow of chastity in your honor. But first I need to break out of this ice and get to initiation…"_

Before he could try to break out on his own, a shadow leapt down from the ceiling and slapped a hand around his mouth. It took a second for him to recognize the specter as Blake, and in that time, she had none too gently started to break him free. She was muttering something under her breath about betraying her, not being on his team, and needing a leash, but Jaune was busy repressing any noises to avoid any more attention from the bickering girls.

He was clear in thirty seconds, which was unfortunately just enough time for the two girls' argument to pause for breath and the aforementioned sisters to arrive on the scene. That is to say, all the girls on the Crazy List were in one place and just waiting for a spark to set them all off.

Jaune took a step away from the powder keg. The bell on his neck jingled. Everyone's eyes were locked on the piece of jewelry. Blake grabbed his collar and gave him a single tug toward her. "Mine."

That set everything off. Weiss attacked Blake shouting an insult, Pyrrha went for her spear which was in the hands of Ruby, Blake was trying to lead Weiss over to Yang, Yang was attacking anyone who showed aggression and Jaune was just trying to get away from the madness.

" _This is a tactical retreat from a hopeless and pointless struggle. There's no need for me to get involved. At worst they'll be a bit lower on aura for the initiation test, at best it will be a warm-up. So there's really no reason to stay and try to stop them and end up becoming some prize to be dragged along by the victor. Especially because I still don't have my aura unlocked. Damn you again Jirai, and your insistence that my future partner unlock it. Sure, you trained me relentlessly in evasion, but that's not going to solve everything! Like, what if I get launched off a cliff without a parachute or Lorelei? You're probably watching this and laughing your ass off while some shady figure is steepleing his fingers and talking about how this is all according to plan…"_

-Ozpin's Office-

"Well… This isn't going according to plan…" Ozpin, Jirai, Port, Oobleck and the Seven Arc Sisters all sat in the headmaster's office to watch his plans unfold, or in this case, unravel. "I didn't believe that Miss Nikos would be so adamant about Master Arc's freedom to be his own man, I thought she would be diffusing any situations like this."

Jirai was busy writing in his notebook as Oobleck corrected spelling and grammatical errors over his shoulder. Port was chortling at all of the girl's youthful energy. The sisters were the only ones paying attention to the headmaster's monologue.

The second youngest, a human in a wheelchair wearing a dark blue pilot's uniform, raised her hand for a question. "Most of these girls don't know Big Brother nearly well enough yet, why are they fighting over him?"

Port gave a chuckle and answered before Ozpin. "Jolly good observation, Miss…?"

"Navy, Sir."

"Miss Navy Arc. They aren't fighting over Master Arc, really. The conflict may have been initiated by that, but he is merely an instigator for their conflicting world views to duke it out! Why, I used the same method when I was first gaining the trust of my team; It was a bright day with the wind gently blowing, the perfect day for a hunt…"

Ozpin cut off the professor to prevent a rambling story. "Miss Schnee is fighting for her view that honor and responsibility must be upheld. Miss Nikos is fighting for her view on individuality and freedom from conforming and assumptions. Miss Belladonna is taking out her frustrations concerning human-faunus relations on the heiress of a prejudiced company while defending the one friend she's been able to find and cling to. Miss Xio Long is just fighting to defend her sister, but will be subconsciously drawn to think of it as fighting for the boy when she looks back, and Miss Rose isn't fighting and just wants to make some friends without losing the one that she's managed to make."

One of the older girls, a multi-tailed fox faunus, spoke up next. "Is this a warning sign for their future interactions? You did plan to have their teams working closely together."

Oobleck looked up from Jirai's notebook to give a response. "Get the aggression out now; and it will make solving the issues later easier."

Jirai added onto the thought. "Plus, if the kid's locked up with them, then he's going to be forced to intervene and quell these fights. I'll just have to work some magic to make him realize that his spinelessness is shameful for a warrior. It's nothing to worry about, Vell."

"But which one's going to be his partner? Black, White, Yellow, or Red?" That was the moist boisterous of the sisters, the self-proclaimed dragon faunus Hestia.

All eyes locked on Ozpin as he audibly took a suspiciously long sip of his coffee. He finished the cup and set it down with a heavy sigh. "I was planning on having it be Miss Nikos, but all of my plans fell apart when you girls shoved Miss Belladonna together with him. My plans didn't account for her intervention in this situation. Honestly, it actually is almost random now. We'll have to watch to find out. But I should get down to the cliffs to give the rules for the test, Glynda wouldn't approve of me skipping that even for such important matters as these."

As the doors of the elevator closed and the prerecorded announcement for the students to come to the cliffs played, everyone left in the office looked at each other.

Jirai broke the silence. "Ten Lien on the cat-girl."

That started the waterfall of bets on everything from partners to most stylish landing and including how many wounds Jaune would receive without his aura.

Vell M. Arc marked down the bets and took the money, looking like a perfect calm secretary. However, on the inside she was placing the finish touches on her money throne and settling down into a throne cuddle session with her Jaune.

" _All According to Plan."_

- **Chapter 3 End** -

 **First of all, here's a short list of all Jaune's sisters, their ages relative to him, their races, and areas of expertise. I'm honestly a little proud of some of these. They all have unique semblances, but I'll save revealing those for later.**

Cherri; +2 yr, Spider-faunus, Doctor

Cream; -1 yr, Sheep, Nurse

Vell M. (Manilla); +1 yr, Kitsune (currently 3 tails),

Hestia; =, Dragon, smith

Laurelai; =, Athlete, human, semblance; Gravity

Pernula; =, Teacher, sloth-faunus

Navy; -1 yr, Pilot, human, crippled

 **Once initiation is done, I'll probably do flashback chapters for the sisters. Yay for color puns.**

 **Short episodes, short chapters. Keeps them rolling out quicker, especially when this is just a hobby for when work is slow.**

 **About Blake, my view is that when a person cuts off ties to their old life like she did, they either fall down and in on themselves, or they latch onto a crutch. Jaune is effectively the "rebound guy" that she chose on somewhat flimsy reasons to get back at Adam. Plus, her canon goal pretty much is wrapped up in Human-faunus relations and the White Fang, so if there was another group that seemed to be working to the same goal, I feel she'd join to at least keep an eye on them.**

 **For Pyrrha; No matter how nice someone is, a bad day can do a lot to shorten your temper. Like, say, not being able to fall asleep because there's moaning coming from the other side of the wall and you can't move unless you want to step on someone. Or there not being any hot water for the shower. Or every single person either asking for your autograph or giving you the cold shoulder because you're famous.**


	4. Ganging up

**Restoring the Family Honor**

Chapter 3; Ganging up

The real reason Jaune never trained to be a hunter is that he was busy fighting the temptation to be a playboy. It's Jaune vs. his imagined Harem. AU, Some crack.

 **Disclaimer; I don't own RWBY and this is total AU. Enjoy the ride, check author's note at the end for concerns, and kindly leave a review.**

 **This is told primarily from Jaune's perspective, and he is not the most reliable narrator. Other perspectives will likely be equally unreliable. Trust No one; they're all in on it!**

 **Responding to reviews;**

 **First of all, thank you to every who left a review.**

 **DarkDurian; Yes, they ARE all crazy, or at least, that's how Jaune sees them. That means I've done my job well.**

 **ZenithTempest; The conspiracy is real, man, that's all I can say.**

-Honor-

" _You know, I think that monk stuff has some worth. A bit of harsh living is good for the aura, I already spend most of my time praying for deliverance from Oum, and I would probably have gone crazy if I didn't have practice meditating. That's right, Inhale… Exhale… Smells like wood. I wonder what type of tree this is?"_ Jaune's improvised landing strategy had been interrupted by a spear to his hood. The back of his hood. So, he was now hanging with his face full of tree. _"At least I'll be able to hear when Pyrrha comes for her spear… Or Blake comes for me… Actually, no I won't hear that later one, and won't have a clue it's happening until I'm lying beneath her and staring into her- NO! Don't go there! Don't even think of relationships with crazy!"_

The sound of rustling in the bushes drew his attention. He honestly hoped it was a Grimm. If it was one of the other students, then there was no guarantee of his safety.

"I'm sorry about the spear, but you looked like you could use some help with the landing strategy."

" _Oh crap, she threw that spear to make sure that she'd know where I was and couldn't escape! She_ knew _I'd get stuck facing the tree so that no one else could make eye contact and be my partner! I'm not going to have any true security with her, am I? I'd better not start missing underwear…"_

"Is there still room on your team?"

" _Here's my chance!"_ "Definitely! But could I have some help getting down? It's hard to make eye contact through a face-full of bark."

He could just hear the diabolical smile in her words. "Definitely."

He braced himself for a fall, but it didn't come. Instead, there was more rustling in the bushes, the clanging of metal, and the sound of staggered small arms fire. _"Alright, the trap went… close enough to plan. That should be Blake following her tracker engaging the yandere in a catfight. Now I just have to get down, and the number of crazy girls around me will be down by two without murder and only minimal danger."_ He had to amend that thought as the sounds of fighting increased. _"So long as I make sure that they don't murder each other, that is…"_

He braced himself against the tree and grabbed ahold of the spear. With his left hand, he pulled out his sword and carefully went to work cutting off his hood. But it seemed that fate hated him, as the spear pulled out of the tree just as he finished cutting his hood.

He plummeted to the ground and barely managed to slow himself on a low branch before he hit the ground. His hood slowly drifted down to land on his face. Insult to injury.

The thud of his landing seemed to be the cue for the girls to stop as they both raced over to him. Pyrrha reached out a hand to remove the loose hood, but Blake intercepted. The two girls glared at each other as Jaune pushed himself up.

He mustered up his most sincere hurt voice. "Blake… I thought you were going to be my partner…"

Both girls looked at him, before looking back at each other, and realizing their fatal mistake. Blake extended her hand first and gave a greeting through clenched teeth. "I guess my partner is the Invincible Girl, then."

Pyrrha took the hand and responded with equal grip. "And I guess my partner likes to judge people before she knows them."

As the two girls continued to crush the other's hand, June was internally dancing. _"Those were the two girls I was most worried about getting stuck with! Since they're paired up, that means I don't have to worry about them nearly as much! All according to Plan!"_

-Ozpin's Office-

"Pay up Jirai! Cat-girl is with Invincible-Girl!"

"I call interference! If those Grimm hadn't burst into that clearing, she would have snuck away with him before Invincible-Girl even knew what happened. I demand a refund!"

"A loss is a loss, regardless of circumstance. Now pay up, and stop planning to manipulate a rivalry!"

-Forest-

The noble Weiss Schnee was faced by a pair of Grimm, but she did not feel fear. Fear was for peasants and civilians. Her shaking was merely excitement at the prospect of her first real fight.

She thought back to her training; Legs slightly bent, proper foot forward, right dust selected, motions for the glyph perfectly executed.

Then all of it was made pointless when an Ursa flew through the air and struck her targeted Beowolf. A familiar blonde followed close behind, aura blazing around her. "All right, who else wants to help me relieve my anger?"

The remaining Beowolf growled and leapt at its new target.

And was promptly thrown back by the force of Yang's punch.

As yang's anger began to cool, Weiss felt hers begin to rise. "You dunce! You interrupted my attack and-"

"Oh look, it's the Ice Queen. Or should I say, Weiss-Quream? Eh? Eh?"

The very noble and proper lady put her hands on her hips. "My name is Weiss Schee, Heiress to the SDC, not Ice Queen."

Yang responded by leaning forward and giggling. "And here I thought it was Snow Angel. Or does only _he_ get to call you that? Your special, sexy Idiot." She pitched her voice for the last part to make her joke clear.

"You're the idiot if you think I actually enjoy when he calls me that bar level nickname. He uses it specifically to get a reaction out of me… And it's the first thing I plan to break out of his terrible habits."

"Ohh, Lover-Boy has a girl trying to fix him up! Shame he's a monk, but that might save you from feeling inadequate."

Weiss crossed her arms tightly around her chest as Yang rolled her shoulders back. "Hardly, he must have just rejected you because he has more refined tastes."

Yang snickered. "I don't know about refined, but from the bulge I saw him give, his tastes are just fine."

It took a second for that to sink in. "YOU HARLOT!"

Yang realized that she was only a few seconds away from dodging a rapier if she did nothing. So she did the next worse thing. "Aww, did I hurt the Princess's feelings? Let me kiss it to make it better~"

The response came in the form of a rapier thrust. Yang dodged the sloppy attack and took off to the North, cackling all the way.

-Ozpin's Office-

"Snow Angel is partnered with the Aviators Party Girl." Vell turned from watching the students and held out her hand to collect the money.

Jirai slapped a notepad down, one steamy story already set for publication. "Isn't her semblance something to do with fire? Heh, heh. Fire and Ice, I'll ship that!"

"Despite the fact that they can't seem to stand each other?"

"That, my dear, is what makes it so appealing. That hostility is obviously just belligerent se-"

Cherri clamped a hand over her adoptive father's mouth. "Cream's listening! Don't corrupt her!"

Vell watch her sisters planning their father's punishment as she mentally calculated how much it would take to ruin the SDC and buy the ex-heiress as a maid.

-Forest Ruin-

"Alright Pyrrha, it's your turn. Truth or Dare?"

The trio hadn't run into anyone. And since they had already arrived at the ruins, Jaune decided to wait for a partner and the girls insisted on waiting for him to choose a relic before they did. Pyrrha suggested they get to know each other better in the time they spent waiting, and Blake mockingly suggested Truth or Dare.

Pyrrha chose not to pick up on the sarcasm, and now she was regretting it. "Umm, Truth?"

Jaune was the one asking this time, so she seemed to be much more willing to talk about herself. "Alright then… How was your relationship with your father?" Learning about her father and any possible daddy issues could go a long way to disarming any bouts of psychotic affection.

"I never knew my father… He died before I was born. My mother raised me by herself. She's the one who pushed me to become a celebrity." And that was a bad sign. That tends to mean no obvious preference in men and instead looking for something much more undefined. How do you turn a girl off her first crush when she decides what turns her on based off her first crush? "But, ummm, What kind of girldoyoulike?"

Blake answered before Jaune had a chance to process. "Rather brazen, aren't you Champion? You're supposed to let him choose truth or dare." Who knew Blake could be so catty?

" _I'd really rather not say that I'd date any girl that's nice, cute and sane. That would give her far too much encouragement and give me nothing but the truth to repel her. And I'd rather not tell her that she's going to go crazy if we date."_ "I'll do a dare."

Pyrrha looked around, obviously lost. Her eyes wandered to the sky and seemed to catch something. "That girl, she's falling!" a quick glance to the sky confirmed that, yes, there was a girl falling. "Catch her!"

As Jaune rushed off to help the girl, Blake stayed leaning against one of the pillars. "You're not very good at this game, are you? You're supposed to make him do things he normally wouldn't do, like go back on a promise, or abandon his real partner. I know you can make him do that."

The two girls snapped into combat stances when they heard movement in the bushes.

Yang burst into the clearing, laughing manically, just in time to see her sister saved by Jaune. She was impressed and thankful.

Weiss burst into the clearing using words that should never need to pass a lady's lips just in time to see her (intended, future) fiancée twirl that bumbling red-cloaked girl. She was extra furious.

Then one action changed almost everyone's status to confused. Ruby opened her scythe, and was rubbing against him with her weapon grinding against his sword.

The girls rushed to pry them apart. Jaune was frozen in shock as the supposedly cute and innocent Ruby was doing some very non-innocent things to him. He could feel that she was starting to develop curves that his libido very much wanted to get acquainted with.

Meanwhile, Ruby was whining at the coming separation. "Yaaang! Crescent Rose is just happy to see her boyfriend! That's how you always acted whenever you had a boy!"

Two figures appeared on the boy's shoulders; One was wearing a horned Grimm mask, the other sported a pair of white wings.

The dark themed one spoke first. " _Jaune, you know her type. She looks all innocent and can fool whoever she wants, but just uses that to get away with whatever she wants. And what she wants is obviously you. So go with it. Fight back a little. Give the female dog a bone and you'll tame the bitch. Though with a girl it's give her the D-"_

" _That's reprehensible!"_ The light themed side interrupted. " _You can't just do that! No, you have to get married first! You need to be prepared for children! You need to be loving and dedicated to one another, giving and receiving pleasure equally! You can't just act selfishly without regard for the consequences!"_

" _Oh, I plan for the consequences. Her sister gets jealous and hides it as anger so we give her the same treatment as her sister and live babies ever after with two collared mommies_."

" _That is a good point- Being a huntress is dangerous work and having more than one wife would be the wisest move…"_

Jaune mentally interrupted the two figments of his imagination. _"Isn't one of you guys supposed to be my conscience? Why are you both telling me to do her?"_

The two halves looked at each other before answering simultaneously. " _No, we're both your libido_."

" _Of course. I should have known._ "

-Office-

"And Jaune's official mission teammate is… Moe Weapons Girl! Hestia wins!"

The dragon girl stood up to accept the cheers, but pushed the prize money back. "I'd like to trade in the money for the bedding chart!"

Five of the girls looked at each other in confusion, but Vell merely gave the smallest of frowns. "You may get to warm his bed, but be warned! I control the heat."

The two sisters glared at each other. Hestia unfurled her wings. "What exactly do you mean by that, Dear Sister?"

Vell moved closer and released her three tails behind her. "Exactly what I always mean. You'll never get Jaune if you spend your time fighting me."

Hestia looped her arm around the back of the shorter girl's head. "Then I'll just have to find a way to control you. I think I know just the way…"

Jirai gave an awkward cough and interrupted the moment. "As much as I appreciate your practice, Jaune isn't here to be tempted. And don't you think it's about time to release the big Grimm so they all have to work together?"

The two girls backed apart without an ounce of embarrassment. Hestia gave a curse at their brother's absence making the entire play pointless. Vell just smiled wickedly as she kept a hold on the gambling money and bedding chart.

-Ruins-

"Alright Ruby, you can let go now. You still need to choose a relic for-"

"Got One!" Before he had even finished speaking, the girl had raced over, grabbed a piece, and returned to hugging him.

Jaune actually looked at the piece and suppressed a groan. "Ruby? Do you know anything about chess?"

"Nope! Is that what these are? This one has an O on the top, so it made me think of you; Jaune the Paladin of Oum!"

" _This girl is going to be the death of me."_ "Well, it looks like Ruby has chosen. The King piece it is." " _But why are there three…-Wait, What's this shaking?"_

As the other teams begrudgingly went to grab their pieces, the small tremors increased. Just as the last group retrieved their relic, a Deathstalker burst into the clearing, quickly accompanied by the screeching of the giant Nevermore.

"Would now be the time to tell you that my teacher insisted that my aura only be unlocked by my partner?"

The looks on the girls' faces told him that it was not the ideal time at all.

- **End Chapter 4-**

 **I plan to skip over the fights with the grimm and just give a summary at the start of next chapter. After all, fighting Grimm is what he WANTS to do, and there isn't much room for freaking out over your hot teammates in the heat of battle.**

This chapter feels a little slow, since it's mostly set-up, but I feel it does well at setting the dynamics of each pair. The only pair that isn't changed is Ren and Nora, because you just can't beat that sloth call. As for teams… I have something a little special planned to torment poor Jaune (As if he needs anything more on his plate).

Changing one of the sister's names, but she hasn't been introduced yet, and the race of another that wasn't explicitly stated, so I feel it's fair.

Next chapter is teams, Jaune's vision of Oum granting him power, first duels, Arc Semblance, and the story of how Jaune met and enthralled Cherri and Cream. Should be fun. But it may be a time in coming. Next chapter I plan to do is chapter 3 of Abyss/Zero, and my writing is inconsistent. I'd ask for a beta, but with going dark for months at a time, it would just be impolite.

Cherri; +2 yr, Spider-faunus, Doctor; stop

Cream; -1 yr, change to cow, Nurse; symbiosis

Vell M. (Manilla); +1 yr, Kitsune (currently 3 tails); copy

Hestia; =, Dragon, smith; heat absorption

Laurelai; =, Athlete, human, semblance; Gravity

Casandra; =, Teacher, sloth; dreams

Navy; -1 yr, Pilot, human, crippled; possession (non-animate)


	5. Promised too Much Part 1

**Restoring the Family Honor**

Chapter 5; I Promised Way too Much for this Chapter (Part 1)

The real reason Jaune never trained to be a hunter is that he was busy fighting the temptation to be a playboy. It's Jaune vs. his imagined Harem. AU, Some crack.

 **Disclaimer; I don't own RWBY and this is total AU. Enjoy the ride, check author's note at the end for concerns, and kindly leave a review.**

 **This is told primarily from Jaune's perspective, and he is not the most reliable narrator. Other perspectives will likely be equally unreliable. Trust No one; they're all in on it!**

-Beacon Initiation Ceremony-

"Could Mr. Arc, Miss Belladonna, Lie Rin, Miss Nikos, Miss Rose, Miss Schnee, Miss Valkyrie, and Miss Xio-long come up front, please? Six of you retrieved the white queen pieces, while Arc and Rose retrieved the white king piece. This sort of blunder has never happened before in the history of Beacon, and the students responsible for placing the relics have been assigned to detentions with Port as punishment. However, this still leaves the issue. After much contemplation, we decided that an unprecedented solution is needed. Therefore, you will be the first eight person team of Beacon Academy."

" _An eight-person team? With six of them girls? Is this karma? Was I some sort of playboy in a past life, and now I'm being punished with a violently insane harem? First my sisters, then 'ice tsundere' Weiss, 'too innocent for my good' Ruby, overzealous and overprotective Yang, bondage Blake, proto Yandere Pyrrha, and now Nora who's… insane. At least she's taken… I think. Anyway, that Rin guy seems cool and can help with Nora. I just pity whoever gets stuck leading this group."_

"Your name is JYVLNBRS, Javelineers; Led by Jaune Arc."

" _Of course, why did I expect anything else?"_

"Now that all of the important people are on teams, I'd like to take this opportunity to introduce our new staff members. The famous Arc sisters will be serving as auxiliary staff for the next four years and will be staying with team Javlineers in the old student lounge. They will be contacting some of you to set appointments for supplementary lessons in the near future. Take advantage of this and continue to grow. If there are any complaints about the loss of the student lounge or the additional classes, please fill out the proper com plaint forms and submit them to Glynda between the hours of five and six A.M. with the complaint fee and a new coffee maker. Thank you for your understanding."

" _How, in all the tales that Jirai told me about Ozpin and Beacon, did I miss the fact that everyone on the staff and most of the students are insane. Wait… that includes me now… Meh, not like my life made sense before. May as well get started on getting used to resigning myself to that truth."_ Jaune was forcefully swept off his feet in his daze as his sisters whisked him off to their new room, his team in close pursuit.

-The Room-

"Sooo. I guess we figured out why our monk decided to take his vows…"

"A monk?" Cherri looked up from her perch on top of Jaune's arm to stare at the blonde girl for a second before bursting out laughing. "As if we'd let him! That'd just be too cruel!" Pyrrha was about to say something, but Cherri cut her off. "You'll figure it out. We just need to unlock this stud's aura so we don't have any wasted time." Jaune tried to raise a protest, but Cream smothered it in her bosom. "Ruby, since you're his partner, you get the honors."

The red themed girl took a step forward before she was stopped by her sister and her black-clad teammate. "Stay back Ruby. Lady Killer's harmless, but his family is way too eager to set him up. I'll take care of it."

Jaune managed to extract his face long enough to protest with an undertone of resignation. "Sisters. All seven of them. They're adopted and my uncle is a pervert. What did you expect? Could you just let me out and I'll get Goodwitch to do it; she should understand."

Blake looked completely ignored his protests, before stepping forward. "No, he was supposed to be my partner, I'll do it."

At this point Nora burst into the confrontation. "I wanna do it! Can I do it, Rin-Rin?"

"ENOUGH!" everyone's eyes locked to Jaune, who had wrestled himself away from his sisters, at the cost of his shirt. "If it has to be my team that awakens my aura (because Jirai is an ass), then it's best for all of us to suffer through it together, no matter what my sisters have planned. Hopefully it should lessen the… Why are you all staring?"

Underneath his shirt Jaune sported a series of modified ammo belts carrying smoke bombs, flash-bangs, tasers, pepper spray, lockpicks, and handcuffs, all artistically arranged to accent the definition of the muscles to which his undershirt clung. To say it another way, he was recreating his début cover of "Huntress Supply - Swimsuit Edition."

Yang gave a laugh before responding. "I thought you might have some big guns under your shirt, Lady Killer, but I wasn't expecting a full armory, eh Ruby?"

The girl was too busy drooling over the goods to even register that she had been addressed. "Want…"

Yang grabbed her sister and shook her. "No, Ruby! Boys are my thing! How am I ever going to explain to Dad that I let you get a boyfriend? Think of your big sister! Weiss! You're my partner, help me snap her out of this!"

The heiress gave a dramatic sigh and cut short her appreciation of the show offered her. She grabbed Ruby with her left hand and placed her right over Jaune's heart. "Do as he says. Whatever effect for which his sisters are looking will be more diffused with more people. At the very least it will take less energy from each of us. Then we can figure out the second-in-command when we have more time."

One by one, the seven girls of the team formed a circle around their leader. Weiss opened her mouth to recite the traditional aura awakening formula, when Ruby beat her to it. "Arise, shining knight, and protect the innocent! Ride out to battle and return victorious, winning all that you desire. In the name of Justice and cookies and puppies all that is good, find your happily ever after with true love." The other six girls were looking at her varying levels of disbelief, while Jaune let a hidden innocent smile grow on his face. "And, um, I mean, unleash your soul, and by my weapon protect you or something like that."

The moment the words ended, Yang trapped her sister in an inescapable sororal hug. "You are so cute!"

Weiss pushed the two apart to scold the younger girl. "You complete and utter child! Did you even stop to think about what you could have done? Aura is the power of the soul, no one knows what sort of changes can come from using different words to awaken it."

Yang of course came to her sister's defense. "Lay off. Ruby skipped ahead two years, she hasn't learned everything about aura yet. We're all fine, so just lay off!"

The argument continued indistinctly while the rest of the team went to work making the room their own. Jaune tried to intervene in the argument, but was quickly frozen out by Weiss. The only thing that stopped their fight was news of a greater crisis.

"Bunk bed, bunk bed, bouncy bouncy bunk bed."

"Nora!" Navy's worried gasp was what caught most of their attention. "We called dibs on the lower bunk already, your team has the top one!"

It took a second for the implications of her words to sink in. There were two beds, and one of them was for the Arc Sisters, meaning…

"I volunteer to sleep on the floor." All of the girls in the room looked at the one guy with varying levels of disappointment, confusion, respect, and nevermind, Nora had found out that one of the Arc sisters was a sloth-faunus, but she was previously looking at him with excitement and the words "pillow fort" on the tip of her tongue. "The beds are large enough-"

"-Harem sized-"

" _Cherri just had to interject that little tidbit, didn't she_?" "As I was saying, the beds are large enough for all eight of us, but I'd rather not risk making any of you uncomfortable." _"Or accidentally earning a death sentence by rolling over the wrong way in the night. Yeah, not having to be chained up every night sounds more comfortable for me too."_

"I wouldn't mind sleeping with you, but why don't you just sleep with your sisters?"

Yang stared in openmouthed horror at her sister's accidental innuendo, but Jaune took it in stride. "Let's just say that are sisters are… aggressive… with their cuddling." _"That is to say, all of them are insane and enjoy tormenting me…_ " "I'd rather not return to the days where I'd go to bed in pajamas and wake up in my birthday suit."

Laurelai caught the blonde in a headlock with one arm while using her other to flash the boy's abs again. "I personally would prefer that, actually. I worked you hard enough for this body that you shouldn't have any shame over showing it off. I'm sure the other girls would appreciate it too. Unless…" she gained a diabolical smile as she released her adopted brother. "Jaune, you're too good." Dread filled the blonde's being. "You're going to start off our mornings with a striptease!"

Ignoring anything that could even resemble agreement from his teammates, Jaune merely held his hands out in a silent plea for sympathy, or at least pity.

The forces at work in the universe laughed and rolled a die to see who would be spooning him when he awoke.

-?-

"Wow, nat. 1. Ruby Rose it is, then! That'll be interesting to write. Now, what's next on the list of things that I promised… oh yes, the talk between Jaune and Oum."

Jaune Arc floated on the force of his will upon an endless abyss of half-formed thoughts and abandoned concepts. He looked around for stable ground but found none until a hand made itself known on his shoulder.

"On second thought, this should be more interesting." Before he knew what was happening, Jaune was sitting across from a dark-haired man. A cup of steaming tea sat in front of him. "Drink up. It's Earl Gray; I thought it would be appropriate considering the color thing your world has."

As he nursed the drink, Jaune contemplated what he should ask. Eventually he decided to start out with the most obvious and go from there. "Are you Oum?"

"No." The shocked look on Jaune's face was hilarious. "Monty Oum passed away, may he rest in peace. I'm simply an author who took what he imagined and created my own world out of it. You can call me YaldabaOum. Because Gnosticism… Yaldabaoth… wait, would Persona 5 exist in this universe? Would Gnosticism? The Tale of the Two brothers has a bit of dualism, but… Damnit, now I have to explain Gnosticism! So, …

…

…

And I just realized that that explanation took up way too much space and killed the pacing on an unfunny joke, so now I have to delete it!"

"Delete what?"

"Exactly. So, instead call me NarratOum!" The look on his face said that he was deciding between attempting murder and suicide. "Fine, just call me the Author, or Oum or whatever you want so long as the audience understands."

"Can I pretend that this was a bad dream and go back to troubling a deaf heaven?"

"C'mon, it's not that bad being in a fanfiction universe! You're actually far closer to your dream and better equipped than you would be in cannon. And if you think about it, there's way more fanfiction Jaune Arcs than there are cannon; You don't hear any of them complaining about it, do you?"

There was a beat of silent contemplation. "You're right!"

"And besides, I have some rewards ready for playing nice."

"Wait, am I actually getting rewarded for the whole vow of chastity thing?"

"No, you don't get magic powers for being a virgin when your reason was purely self-preservation. At least, until you turn thirty, then you become a wizard! But what I'm offering is the exact opposite. Keep doing interesting and funny things, and I'll pull a few divine strings: Manipulate luck for you, bring in powers from other universes, perhaps even give you the opportunity to become a greater hero than any of your ancestors ever became. Not bad, eh?"

"As much as this sounds like the sort of deal my sisters would make when they have a trick up their sleeve, I'll take it. Now what about my semblance?"

A sly smile appeared on the man's face. "Your power is the same as your ancestors; Connections. We'll speak again later, Jaune Arc, but it's time for you to wake up."

-Javelineers' Room-

Jaune awoke to the uncomfortably familiar feeling of cold steel on his skin. He cracked one eye open and took in the sight of a fully deployed red Mecha-scythe pressing into him from his front, while its owner had wrapped herself around his back. Her hands were exploring everything they could reach while her mouth was working at creating a hickey on his neck. He was about to make a move to gently pry her off when Crescent Rose moved between his legs, inadvertently threatening his manhood. _"Stuck in place, getting groped by a girl who I very much hope is more interested in the weapons under my shirt than the muscles, and also getting a hickey from said girl who I'm fairly certain has never kissed a boy before. Yup, this just might be a new low. At least no one's up yet to see this… And why can't I quit when I'm ahead? At least I'll die in the arms of a cute girl who isn't trying to kill me."_

"Hey there, Ladykiller. Looks like you and Ruby are best _buds_ now. Get it? Like a flower?"

The reaper removed her mouth from Jaune's neck just long enough to mumble one word. "cookies."

"Ruby, That would be so much cuter if you weren't sucking on my neck."

Yang let out a laugh, before turning serious again. "Seriously Lady-Killer; what kind of cologne are you using? I've only ever seen her do something like this when Dad cooked that giant chocolate chip gingerbread man last year."

"I'll let sanity win over morbid curiosity this time and not ask for more details. Could you help me out?"

Yang crossed her arms and leaned forward. "I dunno… What in it for me?"

"I'm already going to give you a massage."

"And I already haven't beaten you up for getting Ruby interested in boys."

"I'm making breakfast."

"Now we're talking. And…?"

"And… I can make a great mango smoothie…?"

Yang let a little smile quirk her lips. "So long as it has a little umbrella in it."

"Of course, Lady Yang, the great and beautiful has demanded it."

"First you can give strip shows, then you cook, and now you can flatter. Watch out Lady-killer, keep going like this and I just might have to keep you. I'll be nice and teach you how to spar properly." Yang winked, but Jaune paled on the inside. He saw what she did to the Nevermore, and did not want any of that, thank you very much.

"Yeahh, I'd best go before one of my sisters thinks they can cook. The grimm are better at cooking than them."

As Jaune hurried off, Yang dragged her sister away for debriefing, I mean, a sisterly talk.

-Beacon Kitchens-

"TAMAGO RYORI!" (egg dishes)

When Weiss was waved into the teacher's lounge by her immature teammates, she wasn't quite sure what to expect, but seeing Jaune darting around the teacher's kitchen preparing a full breakfast for twenty all in under fifteen minutes while yelling foreign phrases like he was in some kind of children's scroll show… she could honestly say that she was surprised, and was contemplating being pleased as well. Random shouting aside, he put the Schnees' army of personal chefs to shame, and was somehow managing to keep everything mostly clean while doing so.

"ROU JIAN!" (sausage)

Of course, there was still the issue of company. No matter how well an apron frames a boy's ass, it is not proper for a lady to stare. Thus, as a trained noble, it was her responsibility to lead this conversation in a socially acceptable direction. "So, the weather is nice, isn't it."

"Yeah, I guess."

" _Well that died. Guess it's back to appreciating the meat…"_

"SUCHI!" (Juice)

Hestia plopped down with a tray full of various juices. "Is everyone here then? Ready to let them know what they've gotten into?"

The girls of team Javlineers perked up. Pyrrha was the one who spoke. "What is this about?"

Vell leaned forward with a conspiratal whisper. "A secret that must be kept from everyone, even Jaune for both his good, and for the safety of all Remnant; The Arc semblance!"

Pyrrha looked over at the boy with a touch of worry. "Should we really be talking about it here?"

The kitsune faunus waved with one of her tails. "He doesn't pay attention to anything else when cooking, something about focusing his energies. Even then, he should drown us out when he calls out his cooking techniques."

"KARTOFFELWURFEL!" (hash browns)

"See? Nothing to worry about."

"CREPES!" (Crepes)

Nerves aflutter, the girls all leaned forward.

Vell began the explanation. "To say it in a word, the Arc semblance is connections. More specifically he is a relay that allows for the transfer of power and other intangibles along connections that he has established."

Nora gasped. "Jaune-Jaune is like a power vampire sloth!?"

Cassandra moved to correct the bubbly girl as both a sloth faunus, and an expert on the subject. "No. Jaune… gives… stores… not… use."

Navy covered for her slow of speech sister. "What she means is that Jaune isn't the one who benefits from his semblance, you do."

Those words took a moment to sink in.

"BRRRRREAKFAST BURRITOOOO!" (Breakfast burrito)

Yang finally broke the silence. "So what, Lady Killer is some kind of power battery or something?"

Cream shook her head. "More like a giant milk tank. It needs to be filled first, and even then the cream floats to the top."

Lorelai cut in. "At the base of the metaphorical tank is his own aura. With the training we've given him it's three, maybe four times what a veteran hunter would be able to produce, but even that won't last long between everyone that'll be taking. So, power needs to come in from other girls, so he's not trying to protect the entire female hunter population alone."

Ruby timidly raised her hand. "Why does power need to come from other girls? why not guys?"

Cherri answered with only half of her normal irreverence. "That's just the way it works. We believe it was a result of the way that the connections are formed. To say it simply, the connection comes when Jaune and a girl share fluids; sweat, saliva, semen, or blood. The final one demand the least intimacy, but the Arc males are always blood type O negative. That means that they can give to anyone, but can successfully receive blood from only very few, and that is before the issues that aura regeneration adds to blood transfusion."

"WAFFLES!" (A breakfast dish cooked in a special griddle that results in a cake pastry with ridges that form boxes for containing large amounts of syrup)

Vell cleared her throat and recaptured everyone's attention. "This is not something that Jaune can control. Merely breathing the same air triggers his semblance to feed you a trickle of power. It is essential that he doesn't know the details about it though. It isn't something that can be actively controlled. We'll give you more details later, but for now, act natural, and just think of the ramifications. Go for a relationship with him if you can; you won't regret it. Now, shouldn't you be getting to class?"

The girls glanced at the clock to see that they had ten minutes before their next class, but the Arc sisters had used the opportunity to escape, with Hestia carrying her sloth-faunus sister to her classroom. With a bit of grumbling the team trudged to class, with Jaune leading the way and Ruby unusually lagging behind. Her hood hid a grin. She pulled out a picture of her mother and held it close to her chest. "Mom… everything is going according to plan. Dad won't be alone for long now…"

 **Chapter 5 end.**

 **Sorry for the wait.** And sorry for breaking it into two chapters. It's always harder to write once the summer help leaves and the "normal work" resumes, and I promised way too much for this chapter. I'll try to pound out the next chapter in what is left of my Christmas vacation. My New Years resolution is to write more consistently.

Random thoughts; It's fun giving people overpowered abilities that don't actually help them achieve their goals. I feel that's something that can be done more, kind of like One-Punch Man. To that end, yay empowering! I worded it just vague enough that I can still pull unhelpful surprises out of it and not be lying. Also, unless there is some significant work that I missed, this is a mostly completely original semblance for Jaune in that he can't control it and it gives power to other people. Yay for "other intangibles!"

Please leave a review with your thoughts and some constructive criticism. Peace.


	6. Promised too Much Part 2

**Restoring the Family Honor**

Chapter 6; I Promised Way too Much for this Chapter (Part 2)

The real reason Jaune never trained to be a hunter is that he was busy fighting the temptation to be a playboy. It's Jaune vs. his imagined Harem. AU, Some crack.

 **Disclaimer; I don't own RWBY and this is total AU. Enjoy the ride, check author's note at the end for concerns, and kindly leave a review.**

 **This is told primarily from Jaune's perspective, and he is not the most reliable narrator. Other perspectives will likely be equally unreliable. No one knows what is in another's heart or mind, and guessing tends to be wrong.**

-Combat Class-

Jaune Arc was a man of multiple talents. He had an encyclopedic knowledge of Grimm and the weapons used to fight them. He could coordinate armies flawlessly. He could pinpoint a weakness in his enemies guard, and predict how they would move and attack from nothing but the way they held themselves. His soul was so strong and controlled that he could shatter steel with it. He was adept in dust mixing and use, seduction, stealth, infiltration, assassination, wrestling and three types of unarmed combat, medicine, a god of massage massage and cooking, and and could use every vehicle known to humans and faunus as well as a few that weren't as well. He should have been able to decimate anyone who was placed against him now that his aura was unlocked. And yet, there he sat in his first combat class dreading being picked.

How can this be? How, in ten years of personal training from a famous hunter, did the actual, kinesthetic wielding of weapons never come up once?

Glynda Goodwitch stared at him as if she knew his combat inadequacy. "History, strategy, dust use… these will help you thrive, but it is your combat ability that will decide whether you live or die as a hunter. It is essential that every one of you excel in this course. We will start out with an exhibition match between… Jaune Arc and Ruby Rose." The two teammates went to change with vastly varying levels of excitement. Far too quickly, the they were facing off against each other in center stage. "The rules are simple, the match is won when one student drops below 15% aura, is knocked out of the ring, or is otherwise unable to continue."

Jaune took a moment to study his opponent. _"Ruby is a prodigy, and is here two years early. Her skills with a scythe are impressive, but she lacks life experience compared to her combat skills. I can't match her speed, her weapon has much greater range than mine, and is more versatile with its different forms. I can outlast her or overpower her if need be. However, I can't even touch her if I fight straight-up, so I have to control the pace, predict her moves, and lead her into a trap. First, I need to lure her into melee combat."_

Before Glynda even called to begin, Jaune was already enacting his plan. He held out his shield in front of him with his sword hanging limply at his side. The stance would provide adequate defense against ranged attacks, but would fall apart up close. At least, if it wasn't part of his plan.

Ruby took the bait and dashed forward. Her eyes focused on his exposed right leg, planning to sweep it out from under him. Instead, he forced himself up and forward, as if he was going to drive his knee into the smaller girl's chin.

She disappeared in a trail of rose petals, and reappeared behind him, with her scythe poised to slam him to the ground. He grabbed the shaft, and used the momentum to pull himself toward the crimson reaper. He expected her to release the scythe, instead she kept it in a death-grip, and ate the hit. After the moment passed, he was unprepared when they landed, and she ended up straddling him.

Jaune was about to buck his hips, or otherwise try to force her off, but he saw the smoldering rage in Yang's eyes. Glynda's grade be damned, he didn't wat him teammate mad at him. "Umm, Ruby, could you get off before your sister decides that she needs to hurt me?"

The girl tilted her head like a confused puppy. "Why would she think that? It was sparring. You're supposed to try to hurt me."

"… _You have to be faking. I guess I'll have to fight fire with fire."_ "Well, I guess you've got me beat, so I'm at your mercy, Ruby. I'm yours to do whatever you want~"

The girl's eye lit up and her mouth flashed a leer so quickly that it might have been imagined. "That's perfect! Are you free to go to Patch this weekend? Daddy's lonely, so I thought he would feel better if he had a son."

"…You want your Dad to gain a son… Aren't you scared he'll take it as losing a daughter?"

"Loosing a daughter? I'm not going anywhere. I'm gunna' be the best huntress ever!"

"… Ruby, there's this thing called marriage…"

"Is that a Mommy-Daddy thing?" That had to be a smirk she was hiding; she was obviously just trying to tempt him with sexy, sexy innocence.

"…Yes Ruby, Yes, it is. Along with what we're doing, which is why your sister is coming over here to castrate me." Jaune gave an internal sigh at the clueless look on the girl's face. He had to play along with her game or Yang would outright kill him for corrupting her sister. "She's going to take away my 'daddy parts."

"No, I need those to give Dad grandchildren!" Of course Yang was just within earshot for the end of this extremely awkward conversation.

The blonde woman pulled her sister away from her victim, and the last thought that Jaune had before darkness closed on him was despair that he hadn't even managed to touch his opponent's aura.

-Weiss-

Weiss was quite angry at one Jaune Arc. This is not a new state, but the cause was unusual. He got one good hit on that Ruby child and took her down to three quarters aura, then stopped when she landed on him. He could have escaped and continued fighting, but the pervert obviously chose to lay there to enjoy it. The unnatural way her aura refilled was proof that the child had already sucked something from him, since his semblance was refilling her. He got what she deserved when the violent older sister got involved.

It just wasn't fair! She had dibs! And the red girl was stealing her look too; all short and modest curves. That is to say, small chested. Yes, she was equal to a girl two years her junior.

It wasn't fair! Winter had a killer body! Didn't she get the same genes? Was it the curse of being the middle child?

Removing her head from her myriad of anxieties, she turned her attention to the present. After Yang beat Jaune to unconsciousness, Glynda forced her to take Jaune to the infirmary, and Weiss was sent along to ensure that no further harm came to the boy. For whatever reason, the teacher didn't stop the assault until the boy was in the red. Her eyes were looking for something, but apparently didn't find it. Instead the teacher left to have a talk with the young reaper, and Jaune was left in the care of two girls that were unhappy with him.

But even if they were mad at him, the two girls were still rather hesitant to leave him with his craziest sister. Desperate to delay things for just a minute longer, Weiss tried to strike up a conversation. "As much as I agree with the sentiment, what made you decide that Jaune deserved this?" She gestured vaguely at the limp body riding on the blonde girl's shoulders.

She brought the boy down to her arms and too the opportunity to cop a feel of his ass. "Whenever I see a boy getting close to Ruby, I always overreact. I mean, Lady Killer's nice and all and I'd give him a chance to date me if he could survive a spar, but Ruby is way too eager to get a boyfriend."

She gave a depressed sigh and continued. "Our mom died when we were just kids, and there was a close call where Ruby and I almost died. Dad went weird, more than dads normally are; he became desperate to see us grown up and get grandkids, so he really pushed us to start a family. He stopped when I got into Signal and actually started liking boys, but neither of us could manage to give Ruby a reason that she shouldn't. This is actually the first real male friend she's had. She still seems so innocent, and I'm just scared that some creep is going to take advantage of her, so I always feel the need to check whenever a boy tries to be her friend-"

"And all boys like boobs, so they ended up following you instead of being her friend?" The two girls were shocked to see that the door to the infirmary was open and the spider faunus was idly braiding a rope from her webbing. "Are you two going to come in, or do you want to spend more time talking about how you fail at relationships, because people would totally pay to see this if it concludes with you two making out."

Weiss bristled at the verbal attack, but Yang laughed it off. "I would, but I'm afraid I'd get a _Weiss_ cream headache. But what about you? What made you get stuck on Lady-Killer?"

There was a moment of actual, sincere, sane affection shown as Cherri placed a chaste kiss on Jaune's lips. "He's going to change the world, and even if I didn't get to be with him like this, I would still support him." She took Jaune in her arms and led the way into the infirmary. "His drive and fire charmed me back when I was just a little girl in the Arc Orphanage, and he was the new prince who just arrived…

-Flashback-

Cream and I grew up together. Our parents were close friends. No one special, just simple faunus laborers, working in the Schnee dust mines. They died in an accident when we were young. The Schnees didn't want to have to take care of orphans back then, and weren't willing to use child labor, so they used to send all of their workers orphans to the Arc family to raise.

When we arrived, we were greeted by Jaune. He was so serious back then, trying to be the dad for the entire orphanage when his own parents had just died. He knew that his uncle would have taken care of things, but he refused to let another do something that he could do to help anyone. I remember the first time he got hurt for me.

There was a new boy, twelve years old, and he set out to make life terrible for everyone around him. I was going to be his first victim, since I was a faunus, a girl, and had a friend that he could use to hurt me if I didn't bend. He thought he would start small, just stealing my lunch, and no one would notice. Jaune did, and even though he had the loyalty of almost everyone in there, he decided to take on the kid twice his age and triple his weight. The little prince got the shit beaten out of him, but he gave the bully one good punch and took him down. I felt personally responsible, and bandaged him up. Oum, I was so bad back then that I probably made it worse, but that's what drove me to medicine. That's when I knew that I would follow him.

Then came my stupid teenage rebellion. I had studied medicine extensively, and thought that I could fix everything wrong in the world. So, Cream and I ran away to join the newly reordered White Fang since her older brother had joined years back. I practically screamed at Jaune that he didn't understand what I went through when he called to check on us. I was so stupid back then, thought that I knew everything.

Then we found out that we very much didn't know everything. Suddenly, I was told to plant charges in a mine full of human workers. I panicked. I set off the detonator too early. But Jaune was there. I don't know why, or how, but he was there. He somehow found me, and dug me out with nothing but his wits and four ounces of dust. And he got captured for it. When he finally managed to escape, which involved dueling the regional leader of the militant White Fang, he didn't even blame me. He was just glad that I survived, and he swore that he would eradicate the need for the White Fang. That's when I knew I loved him."

-Present-

There was comradery being built, and it seemed like a lesson was about to be learned, so Cream decided to interrupt the moment. "Cherri, you forgot the part where Jirai told you about his semblance and you immediately declared that he needed a mistress for his harem."

The doctor turned to the nurse with a teasing smile. "Sorry, I forgot; which one of us declared that she's marry him after getting one taste of his salad, the very first day we met him?"

Cream blushed like the pure maiden she pretended to be. "It was love at first sight…" She let out a dreamy sigh before letting her smile turn lecherous, "of his equipment! My brother's a bull faunus and Jaune still puts him to shame. Totally worth calling Jaune over when we ran away just to see him fight for my hand in marriage without knowing it." Three sets of eyes focused on the Cow faunus. "It was awesome, Jaune was three steps ahead of Addles the whole time! The nose ring thing that he did was hilarious! Jaune was all 'you know, if you really want faunus to be treated as equals, you should really stop filling all the stereotypes.' Then Addles was all like, 'I'm Adam Taurus! Bull see red! Bull mad!' And that ninja kitty was totally into it, I think she wrote some smut about that even; I should see if I can get a copy."

The other girl's jaws were almost on the floor. Weiss was cursing internally at missing such an event. Yang just let out a low whistle. "Lady Killer's some hot stuff apparently. How come he seems so different now?"

Cherri dragged her jaw off the ground and gave a guilty cough. "Yeaah, we might have sexually harassed him near continually over the course of, like, I don't know… the last 5 years, give or take? He's still there, we just kind of buried him under house-husband fantasy Jaune and reverse-rape fantasy Jaune. If you get into trouble though, he will come out again. Then you can add Serious fantasy Jaune to your wet dreams."

Weiss glared at the Doctor. "I will not, thank you very much. I have no interest in your perversions. I have been trying to make him into a respectable member of public society, something which you have been actively opposing! He's obviously not interested, and whatever you could hope to accomplish has either succeeded or failed, so cease and desist your harassment!"

Cherri held a finger to her mouth in contemplation. "Nope, it'd be suspicious if we stopped now. Plus, it's too much fun. But I'll meet you halfway; I'll help you fix your A cup problem."

"I have no such problem!" She tried to back away, but Cream caught her in a fierce grip. "I am perfectly comfortable in my own body and Jaune doesn't care about such petty, superficial things!"

Cherri stalked up to the girl and received a cheeky thumbs up from Yang. "Well, your personality isn't doing you many favors, so you should at least have an alluring body. Now you can either do as your doctor says and strip, or I'll do it for you. One of these ends up with you walking out with your own clothes on. The other is the fun way."

"I-I will do no such thing!" Weiss tried again to move, but found all of her joints locked in place.

" _Chill_ out Weiss! We're all girls here, the only boy is out _cold_. There's no reason to be so _frigid_."

"Exactly! Doctor's orders." Cherri gave a cheeky wink before cutting the seams apart on the white girl's clothes until she stood in just her panties. "Excellent! Now, measurements!"

"Eh?" Cherri calmly took a sample of blood, and took measurements all around the Heiress's body. "I wasn't expecting you to be so… professional about this…"

"Sorry to crush your hopes Ice Princess, but only Jaune gets molested. You don't really have anything that interests me. I'm just not into girls… Unless its in some kind of a three or more way with Jaune, then there's a point."

"Did I need to know that?"

"No, but since you're here I thought it would be good to let you know."

Yang cut into the conversation. "Is that a thing with Lady Killer's semblance, or does he just like seeing girls kissing?"

Cherri looked over at Yang playing cards with the nurse and smirked. "The opposite of the second actually; He takes it as a personal insult if anyone he's supposed to be making happy has to seek it out elsewhere. That's really the only way we can still get kisses from him, provided he's drunk or in the mood. He really is such a guy sometimes."

Three of the girls present giggled, and Yang glanced over at Jaune to make sure he was still out. "I actually have a question about his semblance. What did you mean by 'intangibles?"

"That is a very simple question with very difficult answers. Technically what is being transferred is aura, and since aura is a manifestation of the soul… you can see how that could get messy. The effects can range from limited telepathy to a subject's body changing to fit someone else's mental image, in extreme cases. There's so much that we don't know. Jaune can't use any of the power that his semblance stores, but the thoughts and desires of aura can affect him if a girl pushes it onto him. In some cases, she can effectively read his mind whenever she wants. It's not a clear answer, but it's all I have. I much prefer simple problems with simple solutions." The computer beeped to signal the analysis of the blood was complete. Cherri abandoned Weiss to check the results. "Speak of the devil… Weiss, you're suffering from low-grade malnutrition. You can either eat more and be milk buddies with the small red one and you'll likely develop in a year or two; or, you could wear heels, stuff your bra, take your daily dose of Vitamin Jaune, and that should get you taller and bustier by the end of the month."

A groan from Jaune caught everyone's attention and killed the previous conversation. "Why does everything hurt?"

Yang winced. "Sorry 'bout that, Lady Killer!"

Jaune gave another groan without opening his eyes. "Am I in the infirmary?"

Weiss wanted to threaten him with death if he opened his eyes, but found her jaw locked as well. Cherri instead replied with a sing-song voice, "Yes, so just open your eyes and see your healing angels."

Jaune gave a sigh and began undoing the straps of his armor with his eyes shut. "Yang, who does she have posing naked?"

"It's Weiss."

The boy managed to undo the straps and lifted himself out of his armor. He pulled off his hoodie and held it out in towards Yang's voice. When he received the all clear, he took in the sight of Weiss dressed in his hoodie, and Cherri pouting. "I know you've got her stuck with your semblance, Arachne."

The doctor held a hand over her heart in mock despair. "I'm wounded! You haven't used my maiden name since that time I convinced you that Cream needed to be milked."

Jaune gave a small blush at Yang's snicker, but didn't waver. "This isn't a game. Your actions have consequences. Causing a rift in my team, like you're so obviously trying to do, can lead to all of us dying. So Cut. It. Out."

Cherri leaned forward, her breathing heavy and face flushed. "What are you going to do about it? Spank me? Teach me with your body?"

The man scoffed. "You'd enjoy that, you deviant. No, I'm removing your portion at dinner tonight. You can get food from the regular cooks, Young Lady."

A look of absolute horror crossed her face, before it was replaced by a petulant pout. "No. You have to release her."

He rolled his eyes. "And a kiss is the only thing that will do it? Fine, I'll play your game of pretend."

The Arc Scion leaned down to look into the Schnee heiress's eyes. Cream changed the hospital ambiance music to romantic violins. Weiss felt her face heat up and her heart beat like mad.

Jaune drew close… then went past her lips and planted a peck on her cheek.

As the boy drew away, Weiss suddenly felt her body come under her control again. She crashed forward, all but tackling Jaune as they both fell to the ground, her lips claiming his.

Yang and Cherri traded high fives. "All according to plan. Operation 'melt the Weiss Queen' phase one complete!"

 **Chapter 6 complete.** EDIT: changed some lines in the opening fight scene to increase the ambiguity of Ruby's clueless innocence. Apparently I downplayed it too much out of fear that it would encroach on Cream's territory of pretending to be pure. I think I found a better medium.

Yay for ambiguity! With this, I fulfilled what I promised and left unfulfilled from the previous chapter and a bit extra. I think next chapter is going to focus more on Jaune's not so shocking discovery that Rin is female, because Ozpin watches too much harem anime and wanted a secret agent to suss out Jaune's secret fetishes.

Also, I have a confession to make. I… can't take the fight scenes in RWBY seriously. As a disclaimer, I've only watched the first two seasons, but whenever I see them fight, it's like I'm watching a store demo of a Dynasty Warriors game. This may be because I watched the fight scenes separate, but that was the only way I could take the plot seriously. All the events of the fight just kind of happen. There is no sense given of what is and isn't possible, and people get hit and hurt because the plots says rather than anything in their own skills or lack thereof. Something about it just utterly fails to sustain my suspension of disbelief. They all run on the rule of cool without a firmly established baseline for what is not cool, except for Jaune who doesn't get enough combat time to actually establish that line. They function as good light shows, but I just can't take them seriously.


	7. I read Twilight for this, be Grateful

**Restoring the Family Honor**

Chapter 7; I had to Read _Twilight_ for this Chapter, You'd Better Appreciate it

The real reason Jaune never trained to be a hunter is that he was busy fighting the temptation to be a playboy. It's Jaune vs. his imagined Harem. AU, Some crack.

 **Disclaimer; I don't own RWBY and this is total AU. Enjoy the ride, check author's note at the end for concerns, and kindly leave a review.**

 **This is told primarily from Jaune's perspective, and he is not the most reliable narrator. Other perspectives will likely be equally unreliable. Honnestly, I just enjoy screwing with your minds, it's more fun for me this way.**

 **Responding to reviews** :

Guest; Wait… People actually read the author's notes? Joking aside, I thought that it would give Cream more of a character to have a brother, and with the milk connection also working for cows, I had the thought that it would be hilarious for her brother to be Adam. Plus, it explains a lot of White Fang shenanigans.

Zenith Tempest; I had hoped to circumvent Jaune being useless by giving him so many tangential skills that he has a fighting change if things go exactly right. I hope to show off what he can do next chapter in a fight with Cardin.

Frank Horrigan; They actually tried to lock away Jaune's Great-Great Grandfather in a monastery. It… didn't turn out well. A giant Nevermore kidnapped him and a group of huntresses from Vacuo rescued him. For the rest of the story… let's just say that he started the tradition of giving the Arc scion seven sisters, and that's the short version of why Vacuo is in anarchy.

 **On with the story.**

-Victory-

Blake and Jaune stared lovingly deep into each other's eyes. They stood on top of a pile of the unconscious bodies of the White Wang extremists who followed Adam in his crazed attack on Beacon. The rabid bull himself was the capstone of the pile, courtesy of Jaune.

Pyrrha stood a few feet away, too stupid and too slow to make it in time. She stood at a distance as the true partners kissed passionately. The sight lit a fire in the Red-head's chest. She had lost, and the man she tried to steal was in her better's arms. The heat flowed throughout her body as she meekly followed the retreating couple. Every kiss they shared made the haze of heat settle deeper over her. She only stopped when the door to their room was closed in her face. She scratched at the door and whined like the pet she wanted to be.

The door swung open and she was greeted by the sight of her new mistress and master holding out a collar and leash for their new pet.

Properly collared, she padded over to the corner and watched with pathetic glee as the man she wanted was taken by the woman better than her. It began with heavy kisses, and progessed to-

-Pyrrha snapped the book shut, her face blushing as red as her hair. "W-w-what was that? Why would Blake write that in her journal!?"

-Rewind; Room Javelineer, Day 2-

Jaune looked at the bickering group of people that was supposed to be his team. It was terrible. Of the four pairs that made up the team, a full half of them seemed to be completely dysfunctional, with only Rin's patience keeping it from being worse. Weiss refused to look at him or even talk to her partner after the incident in the infirmary the day before, and was just generally cold to everyone else. Blake was just plain catty with Pyrrha and… wait, make that just catty in general. She refused to engage with anyone except for cuddling him, and she spent most of her time with her face hidden by a book.

Pyrhha had almost the opposite problem. She tried to engage with everyone, but never did so genuinely. After about a minute, she would put up a photogenic façade and feed them whatever they wanted to hear. No one ever looked behind the façade of the Invincible Girl, and she didn't give anyone the chance, outside of him.

Not that the rest of the team were amazing paragons of the social values either. Ruby was eager to make new friends, but she was so awkward. Yang was playing the overprotective big sister in overdrive, and the revelation that she had teamed up with Cherri made everyone afraid to speak with her, lest they suffer her shipping wrath.

"Jaune-Jaune!" Nora landed on his back from the rickety extension they had made to the top bunk. "What should we do Fearless Leader? Should we do some team bonding? Wrestling? Play a game? Build a tree for your sloth sister to sleep in? Play parcheesi? Oooh, Cheesy Pancakes! Can you make us cheesy pancakes? Please?" The ginger zoomed over to where Rin was slumped. "Rin, can we have cheesy Pancakes? It'll be an after-class treat! It can be a new meal and everything! We'll open a restaurant and name it that! It'll replace the Beacon Café! We'll make millions and then we can buy that sloth preserve you always wanted!"

As Nora continued to rattle on, Jaune's mind finally caught up to what was said. _"A team building exercise just might be what we need. But what should it be? Team combat? No, that would just isolate Pyrrha more. Something a bit more non-competitive? No, then they'd just refuse to work together, or partner with other people… Wait I have just the idea."_

-45 Minutes of Scrolltube videos Later-

There it was, the perfect idea. It was safe, only mildly humiliating, and led them to think that any repairs in their relation would be their own doing. Now he just needed the support from the other male on his team and- "A blindfolded obstacle course? Jaune, you really don't want to see what Nora does when she's blindfolded."

"Rin, I need something to get them working together, and this has the least chance of permanent damage. I feel like Nora's going to be a danger no matter what the activity is. Unless you'd prefer to be the blindfolded one and have Nora guide you?" " _Okay, there's some arm twisting required, but it's a good idea!"_

Rin just groaned and placed her head down on the desk.

"That's what I thought. Now, I'll need you help," Jaune paused as he caught a whiff of himself, "but shower first. Actually, why don't you join me." " _This is a thing guys do together to bond, right?"_

Rin's head tilted to look at him without raising.

"Everyone else but us has already taken theirs after combat class, and our showers are made for multiple people, so it'd be a waste not to. Plus, we're teammates, so it won't be weird." " _Curse my sheltered upbringing! Why was male bonding ever even mentioned… wait, Jirai is a pervert and doesn't do guy-on-guy… Yeah, that explains it."_

"Jaune, do you even know what you're asking?"

"What? It's just a shower. Our team is already co-ed, and the gym showers are shared anyway; it can hardly be worse than that. Or are you worried Nora will get jealous?"

Rin rose resignedly. She would let him find out the error of his ways on his own.

-Showers-

" _This is way more awkward than I expected…"_ Jaune and Rin stood in the shower, backs to each other, swimsuits on, considering vows of silence. _"Should I turn around, make some comment on his body? No, that's the sort of thing my sisters would do; I need to do the opposite. Not that I could do what they would in this situation; I don't have a measuring tape, and I'm not really that interested in another guy's sizes. Have a heartfelt talk? That seems safe, did that with the girls before they were adopted."_ "You know, I've never really had the chance to do something like this…" He could feel Rin's eyes focus on his back. "Just be… one of the guys, so to speak, just be normal. I'd pushed myself to be a leader, to live up the legacy of my family." There was an increase in the intensity of the ninja's gaze. "I can't help but think that I've made things way harder for myself. Now I'm surrounded by crazy girls, who are all really sexy, and I'd totally date any of them, if they weren't so intense about it! I'm kind of jealous that you only have to satisfy Nora, as hyper as she is…"

Rin said nothing, and Jaune started to panic. "I didn't mean to insinuate anything, if you aren't really together- together. You just seemed so close that I assumed-"

Rin raised a gentle voice, and Jaune was struck by how soft it really was. "Nora is… a very close friend, and I expect to stay with her for life, but she has some… misunderstandings… to work through. She's convinced that children are the essence of a relationship."

"That doesn't sound too bad-"

"She plans to share me with whatever boy manages to get her interest, so we'll never be separated."

" _Nora has friend-zoned him that much!? She doesn't even think of him as a man!"_ Jaune turned around and immediately locked eyes with his teammate. He placed one hand on his heart and the other on Rin's shoulder. He then proceeded to swear a solemn oath, "I will do everything in my power to help you."

Music began playing outside, and rose petals floated in through the open door and over the heads of the observers as the two stood across from each other. Jaune threw his arms wide to give his new soul friend a manly hug.

"Boop." Then Nora appeared from the ceiling and laid her claims on the noses of her two subjects.

"Nora-"

"Jauney!" Jaune was struck with a wave of nostalgia as he was caught in another crushing hug along with Rin, and had his face smashed into a kiss with the hyper-energetic ginger. He took a moment to appreciate his situation, along with its marshmallow perks, since he couldn't escape. Then he realized that something was off.

It was a three-way hug. Nora was off to the side. Rin was in front. Therefore… _"Rin has boobs. She is girl, I am idiot. And Nora was right there most of that time, wasn't she? Which means…"_

His head was jerked away and smashed into a kiss with Rin. "He tastes like pancakes, doesn't he, Rin! The sister sloth didn't mention that, maybe that's part of his semblance! Pancake semblance? Wait! When you two have kids, does that mean they'll be the greatest pancake chefs ever! Come on Fearless Leader! We need to get you in shape if you're going to take care of our babies!"

As Nora carried him away, he had two thoughts. One, he realized that Rin had set him up, and he was now stuck keeping Nora occupied as her boyfriend/ babysitter, mostly the same thing when it came to the Valkyrie. The second thought was modest relief that he had leaned to never assume privacy, otherwise Nora would be dragging him to the weight room completely naked.

-Two Hours Later-

"Aww, he's broken." Nora bounced on the blonde to test for a reaction, but only received a pained groan. Perhaps doing her own weight lifting while using herself as the weight for him was too much to start with? "Come on, it's time for supper! They'll run out of pancakes if you don't hurry! Then the syrup will be all alone, and Ursas will attack the cafeteria, and…" Jaune groaned and tried to get up, but Nora hadn't budged from her seat from his chest. "…Then the Rin-Rin laziness disease will mutate into a new type of grimm…" Jaune twitched his arms and gave a little whimper. Gathering all his remaining strength, he attempted to push his tormentor off of him. It didn't work, but it at least caught her attention. "That's the spirit Jaune-Jaune! Another round! Earn the pancakes!"

In a rare turn of events, one of his sisters actually saved him from a girl's ministrations. "Aura… red." Such a shame that it was Cassandra; the diminutive sloth faunus was effectively incapable of doing anything physical to help. The best he could hope for would be some good advice, which Nora would likely not heed. "Give… this. Make… rest" And the worst would be that. Never let her near an unconscious body.

Of course, Nora didn't know or care about that. "Down the hatch!"

As darkness drew around Jaune, he sent a silent prayer that Cassandra still hadn't figured out how to make someone sleep talk…

-Ocean of Plot-Bunnies-

Jaune once again found himself across the table from the vaguely omnipotent figure that could grant him phenomenal cosmic powers. This time, though, he found the man much more difficult to take seriously with a rabbit sitting on his head.

"Don't laugh. The management of plot bunnies is serious business. How am I supposed to focus on one story when an entirely different one is too good to not write?"

"…I have no idea what you're talking about, and it doesn't help me take this more seriously."

With a huff, the author put on a top hat over the rabbit. Jaune tried to withhold a snicker when he noticed the rabbit's ears still sticking out through the hat. The man shot him a warning glare. "You think this is funny now, but you probably won't when it happens to you in two or three chapters; then I'll have my sweet vengeance."

"You're going to make me take up writing? No thanks, Jirai has that covered."

The big O gave a derisive snort. "You think too small and plain, this version of you would be a terrible author. No, you're going to be turned into a bunny boy."

"That… doesn't seem possible…"

"You forget two very important things. 1) I'm the author of your life, and I can do whatever I want. 2) your semblance is a strange and magical thing that can be stretched to accomplish all sorts of interesting scenes."

"So, are you going to tell me what it is, or just keep rattling on about how great it is?"

"Nah, more fun to leave you in the dark. Plus, you haven't done anything really interesting to earn a favor from me. Try giving a harem set-up speech to a pair of your feuding partners and then we'll talk."

"One last question. Are you just a dream that that Cassandra is manipulating, because this seems like something she would do."

"I thought of leaving that up to the readers, but then I decided it would be better to play this straight. She's far too busy enjoying your hands, anyway. Letting her control your dreams AND sleepwalking body would just be silly. Know what, it'll be better to just show you. Plus, you need to have that heartfelt discussion with your team. Now then… Un-sleep!"

-Dinner Table-

"What were you thinking! What are you doing?" Pyrrha's indignant shout jerked him awake, and he quickly took in the situation. His hands were on his Cassandra's back, giving a massage, while seven other copies were at the whims of his sisters and teammates. Vell was relaxing on an adjacent massage mat overseeing the copies she had made, and she took charge of answering the objection.

"Just enjoying the benefits of our boyfriend. You can join, so long as you share."

Nora chimed in while syrup wrestling one of the copies. "Come to the Harem, we have pancakes! And sloths! And Jaune! And Pancakes! And- Ooh, the chair! Thanks Yang!" The previously mentioned Jaune winced as the hyperactive girl broke the metal folding chair over the copy's back.

He searched frantically for Rin, so that the girl could help restrain her partner. Unfortunately, the Mistrali ninja was far too occupied enjoying her own benefits; napping while soaking in a mineral bath and enjoying a facial. Weiss was off in a corner, doing her best to restrain a blush as a copy gave a foot rub, and most of the rest of the team were in similar situations. That left Blake and Pyrrha as the only two girls opposed to the current situation.

"You can't force him to do this, he has a right to choose! You can't just assume-"

"Oh, he enjoys it. So long as you really want him to answer he'll tell you whatever you want." Vell gave a wink, obviously trying to communicate something that Jaune was completely missing. "You don't have any grounds to tell us to stop either; you aren't his girlfriend."

The champion jerked back as if slapped. Her eyes wandered over to the young Arc. He waved off her concern. "Pyrrha, don't worry about me; I can tell you mean well but I don't want you to hurt yourself trying to fulfill my crazy sisters' demands. I don't want to date you just to date you; I want to actually get to know you."

The words struck a cord in the amazon's heart, and her face lit up red. Words formed in her mouth, but tripped over themselves.

Then Blake interrupted the moment. She pushed the red-head to the side and pushed a set of clothes into his hand. "Jaune, partner trip. The newest _Ninjas of Love_ is out."

Jaune didn't miss a beat. "Of course Partner; just give Pyrrha and I a minute to get ready."

The black ninja quirked an eyebrow with an unspoken question.

Jaune stalled for time by making an ostentatious show of putting both legs in the pants at the same time. "Well, she is your partner too, and I think you'll find that you could enjoy having her around if you give her a chance."

Blake gave her female partner a glare before walking out of the door. Jaune immediately followed with the air of a man who recognized that there was no escaping his fate and ready to enjoy what he could of it. Pyrrha followed three steps behind in an uncertain daze.

-Vale-

" _I'm not sure why, but there's something about this that makes me uncertain that this is actually moving their relationship in a positive direction…"_ The trip didn't exactly get off on the right foot. The airship ride was spent cuddling with Blake to stave off airsickness, and Pyrrha sat awkwardly across from them and watched with a steadily increasing blush. The cat faunus had noticed; and was exploiting the champions discomfort as a sort of blackmail. Blake had taken to ordering the red-head like a pet, and would amp up the intensity of her advances with Jaune until she received obedience from the embarrassed champion. Something needed to be done.

"Blake, Pyr, we need to talk." The two girls turned to him; Blake with one hand in his, and the other holding a stick of grilled tuna, and Pyrrha with her arms loaded with books and bags. He sent a silent prayer to the Narrator to at least get something good out of this. "Both of you are precious to me. I hold you both as my partners, even if Ozpin doesn't. I don't want anything to come between us; any of us. I want all of us to be completely honest with ourselves and each other." He gave a pointed glare at Blake with those words.

The cat didn't give anything away, but Pyrrha was blushing and squirming. With her face as red as her hair, she squeaked out a confession only intelligible to the faunus. "Umm Ikindof reallylikeyou becauseyoutreatme likeanormalgirl, butitfeelsreallyweird whenIseeyouwithanothergirl, andit makesmehappy seeingyouhappy and…"

Jaune had no idea what to do. He was trying to build trust by having Blake reveal her faunus ears, but now Pyrrha was the one confessing… something… that he couldn't tell, but Blake was really excited about something in that confession. _"I guess the only thing to do is offer friendzone-level romantic platitudes until I can figure out what she's saying."_

He took a step to wrap an arm around the champion, but the black cat bad luck struck. Rather than smoothly wrapping her in a hug, he ended up pushing both girls into a convenient dark alley and tumbled in after them.

" _Okay, play it cool. That was totally intentional, and you just wanted privacy to expose Blake as a faunus. In other news, Blake has really nice hair, and there is a fifty percent chance that I'm going to lose this hand, so I may as well enjoy it. Wait, No! Stay on topic! Remove her bow. This to build their cooperation! It's for their good!"_ "Pyrrha, there's something you need to know. Blake is a faunus." His hand regretfully moved to revoke her ribbon, but the target of his revelation was quickly distracted away from the reveal.

"And is better than you in every way." Blake reciprocated his action by grabbing his hair and drawing him into a passionate kiss.

Pyrrha didn't notice the faunus ears poking out of her teammate's hair. Rather, the champion was watching them kiss and trying to unravel the knot of her feelings. _"I want more, but I don't know what I want. I want Jaune, but I also want him to be happy… My chest feels tight, but there's an itch. Am I jealous of her? Is this what love feels like? Could I really steal Jaune from her? Would that make him happy?"_

"You'll be good, won't you Pyrrha?" Blake was swimming with ideas. So many more scenes were now possible! All it would take was some educational lessons, and she's have her perfect escapist fantasy brought to life. "Jaune. We're going costume shopping."

"Wait, what's going on? What did she say? Why are you encouraging this?! Wait! Blake, not here!"

Blake turned her head to address the stone still champion. "Watch. This is how you let a guy know you want him. If you can't do this, you should step down. But then you have to watch and be a good girl when someone else does stake a claim."

Pyrrha squeaked out another barely coherent ramble, and Blake took that as her cue. She placed her hands on both sides of the blonde's head and drew close. Jaune drew back. "Blake, as beautiful as you are, and as much as I would love to be in a relationship with you, this is moving way too fast for me." _"Two truths and a half-truth."_ "Could you please tell me what's going on?"

The black themed girl stared deep into his cobalt eyes. "Jaune, you either have to go along with this, or explain fetishes to the Invincible Girl."

Jaune relented and placed a peck on the corner of his partner's mouth. Satisfied that he was willing, Blake tightened the ribbons she had been wrapping around him and went to work making sure that Jaune fully knew how much she wanted him.

- **Chapter 7 Done-**

 **This is turning out to be much more serious than I had planned it to be. I'm not sure if that is a good or bad thing. Things are happening for reasons other than the lolz, people are actually reading the author notes, and Twilight is still terrible. At least some things stay consistent.**

 **I know that promising content for the next chapter is a dangerous thing, but I obviously haven't learned my lesson. Next chapter will feature Truth or Dare, and my take on the Jaundice chapters. Spoilers, Jaune isn't allowed to choose his own friends because he has terrible taste.**

' **Til then, NoctisxSol Signing off.**


	8. Truth and Dares

**Restoring the Family Honor**

Chapter 8; Truths and Dares

The real reason Jaune never trained to be a hunter is that he was busy fighting the temptation to be a playboy. It's Jaune vs. his imagined Harem. AU, Some crack.

 **Disclaimer; I don't own RWBY and this is total AU. Enjoy the ride, check author's note at the end for concerns, and kindly leave a review.**

 **This is told primarily from Jaune's perspective, and he is not the most reliable narrator. Other perspectives will likely be equally unreliable. Honnestly, I just enjoy screwing with your minds, it's more fun for me this way.**

 **On with the story.**

-While Jaune, Blake, and Pyrrha were Away; Back at the Room-

"Do we really have to do this?" Weiss was very much out of her element. She had never played truth or dare; and, though she wanted to play back when she was younger, she would sooner die with dignity than die because of the shame her team would heap upon her.

"Jaune left clear instructions; it was either this or the blindfolded obstacle course." Rin adjusted Magnhild so that it would work as a spinner. "Would you rather stumble through an obstacle course, guided only by your partner, while Nora rampages less than ten feet from you?"

Weiss bit her tongue and looked on in terror as Nora set her hammer to spinning. After about two seconds of watching it spin, the ginger got bored and stepped in to stop it. Cassandra was first up.

"Truth…"

Rin was about to step forward to start the game on a sane note, but Nora decided she wanted to do her sloth imitation and was in the process of choking out the ninja. Instead Yang rose to the challenge. "Have you ever used your semblance to give yourself the night of your dreams?" Everyone stared at her with a mix of confusion and exasperation. "Get it? Cause her semblance is dreams!"

Everyone else groaned, but Cassandra took it straight. "Yes… learned… kung-fu."

Cassandra slowly took a martial arts stance with slothful vigor and everyone gave her a blank look. No one said anything until Nora set the hammer to spining again. Then she picked up the hammer while it was still spinning. "My turn! Give me a dare!"

Rin cut in as the voice of reason. "Give her a truth."

Ignoring the Valkyrie's pout, the sloth continued with a question. "what… relationship…Rin?"

"Rin is my bestest friend! We're going to be together forever, and I'll name my first daughter Rin, and I'll name her first daughter Pancake Syrup! Simple as that!" There was a half second pause as the ball of energy took a breath. "Ruby's next! I dare you to dance with Magnhild in front of everyone!"

Before anyone had a chance to protest, Nora tossed her hammed at the young reaper. Ruby clumsily caught the hammer but was still dragged to the ground by the weapon's momentum. The Rose strained herself, and barely managed to heft the weapon up. She took a single step, and the shift in balance caused her to tumble to the ground again. Nora gave a standing ovation. Rin sneaked away to grab the emergency pancake stash to distract the hyperactive girl if things went too far.

Ruby surged aura through her muscles and forced the hammer back up. Once the heavy weapon was balanced, she relaxed. That quickly proved to be a mistake, and Magnhild slowly tipped over, flinging the small girl like a catapult. Yang was the one to catch the red missile. "Nice dance, Ruby. It was like you were _flying._ " Ruby pulled her hood up and pouted as Yang tried to ruffle her hair.

"Watch what you're doing, you oafs!" Weiss picked herself up from where Yang had toppled her over. "Don't drag me into your absurdities." She dusted herself off, but stopped when she noticed that all eyes were on her. The handle of the hammer proclaimed her as the next victim.

Yang had a Cheshire grin. "Hey _Weiss Queen_ , truth or dare?"

The elegant and graceful Schnee felt like she was having a heart attack. The only thing that calmed her down was the realization that the one giving her the challenge was practically a child. Surely the girl wouldn't be able to find and hit any sensitive topics. "Truth."

The red girl put her head in her hands. "Are you a tsundere?"

"W-W-What?!"

"Yang keeps saying you are, and she won't explain what it is. Is it contagious?"

Yang was howling with laughter. Nora was leaning close with an expectant look on her face. Rin snuck back into the room with the emergency pancakes. Weiss was red as Ruby's cloak. "I-I'd never do such a thing as immature as venting my frustrations of Jaune because like him and want him to be better!"

Yang cackled. "Obvious lie~. Ruby gets to decide your wardrobe for the next week! Unless of course, you want the alternate punishment?"

Weiss pointed her rapier at the older sister. "If you're so interested, I dare you to date that dunce Arc, you- you Bimbo!"

Yang leaned forward to show off her superior assets. "Oh, I intend to. I mean, sexy blonde that can cook, give a massage, and fill me up inall the best ways? Where are the downsides? He can't even lie!"

"He is an insufferable flirt and other women won't stop corrupting him!" Weiss was very fired up about this. "I refuse to take part in a harem for a man who should already be mine!"

"You're right! I forgot the free babysitting part. His sisters, us seven, that's at least two weeks clear for dates and missions! And no way are our kids are going to be orphans!" Ruby looked at her sister in worry as her older sister descended in old, bitter memories. "We'll never have to see him alone after he lost mom, and we won't have to hunt her down because she'll be right there taking care of us and helping Dad…"

A strong hand landed on the girl's shoulder. Yang automatically turned to hug the figure before she realized it wasn't her sister. The blonde brawler tried to draw back, but Laurelai didn't let her escape the embrace. "You aren't alone. Each of us are orphans in our own ways, but we've made a new family together. You're welcome to join; the only cost is a sob story."

Yang felt lighter as the athlete incorporated Ruby into their little group hug. Yang giggled at the feeling of Laurelei's golden hair tickling her nose. She wondered if this would be what it felt like to have an older sister. "Sorry, but Weiss gave me the dare, so it's my turn again. What's your sob story?"

The athlete laughed, but everyone could tell that the topic was still tender. The very air seemed heavy. "Unlike the rest of my sisters, my parents are still alive, they just didn't want me. My father was a Mistrali Politician looking to kiss the ass of someone wealthier than him, and my mother was a trophy wife who sold herself for a life of luxury. My older brother was groomed to be the successor to the family, and I was supposed to become the perfect little toy to be sold off. Long story short, I rebelled. So, when I turned thirteen, my parents tattooed their crest on my back, then dumped me off with Pervy Uncle Jirai."

The gravity of the tale affected everyone in the room, dragging them down. The huntress half of the room were stunned to silence. Yang and Weiss were the most effected. Weiss flicked her eyes at the emblem on her suitcase then over to the black olive wreath that stood out on Laurelei's upper back. "What happened then?"

A smile lit her face, and the weight lifted. "The old goat threw me in a padded room with Jaune, one pillow, and a box of tissues. We wrestled, I won. More wrestling, he cheated, I still won. Then he started tickling me and I ended up venting my entire life's story to him. He listened, told me that I could have anything I wanted if I was willing to work for it, so I decided I wanted him. Now I'm his trainer, the popular face of his family, and in exchange he gives me whatever I want."

"When you put it that way, it sounds like a really unhealthy relationship." Jaune walked into the room, holding a purring Blake with one arm and leading the dazed Pyrrha with the other. "Aren't relationships supposed to be more equal?"

Atlanta playfully stuck her tongue out at him. "It is equal, all you need to do is ask and I'd do anything for you. I accepted that you're my boyfriend and you have to do whatever I want, you just have to realize that I'm your girlfriend and initiate more often. You're the one holding this relationship back. C'mon, be more selfish, you selfish jerk." The light mood had returned, and everyone laughed. "Now be a good whipped boyfriend and cuddle with us while we watch chick-flicks."

Sweat broke out over Jaune's brow. "Can I take your advice and selfishly ask to be excused?"

The sweet smile on the Athlete's face meant trouble. He felt his feet begin to drift off the ground. "Nope. Yang just had a heartfelt confession and needs to be assured that you'll always be there for her. Plus this is the traditional entry ceremony for sister members of the harem."

"Can't we do something else? I mean, I enjoy cuddling with beautiful women as much as the next guy, but most of you are going to get bored of it within five minutes. You remember what happens when you get bored, don't you?"

"Exactly! That's why we need you to keep us entertained!"

Jaune tried in his sweat through sheer force of will. He remembered what happened the last time this happened. Fortunately the proceeds from the book which that night inspired covered repairs, but he was not eager to relive the contests and escalation that happened when seven super-powered girls got bored. "How about this; You let me go, and I can find other guys so you don't all have to share?"

"Nope. We accept no substitutes! You're the only one for all of us, and we expect you to keep up!"

He was dragged through the air to the home entertainment area that Navy and Ruby had designed together, and was left floating above the couch while an argument broke out about who to put where. The argument was settled when Jaune decided that Weiss was the least dangerous and awkwardly pulled her onto his lap. The pale girl blushed and weakly punched his chest once before giving in and making herself comfortable. "I-Idiot. I'm only agreeing to this so the other girls don't do anything. It's not like I enjoy this or anything." _"Curse you Yang, and curse your alternative punishment. This embarrassment is way worse than what Ruby would have had me wearing. At least he's comfortable and smells nice, and it feels good to have his arms around me and… Wait, am I a tsundere?"_

Ruby squeezed herself next to them and looked in curiosity at the pair. "Weiss, you never explained what a tsundere was."

Jaune gave a sigh of long suffering, but couldn't help a smile breaking through. It was going to be a long night, but some part of him actually was taking pleasure in the thought. _"I really need some guy friends, I think I'm actually starting to enjoy things like this…"_

-Next Day, Combat class-

"The next fight will be between Jaune Arc and Cardin Winchester. You have three minutes to prepare."

" _Wait, that guy has a team of all guys. That's perfect! Finally a guy friend; we can go out to fight huge monsters then go to the bar and talk about our relationships with our girlfriends! And we get to start it with a fight! This is textbook perfect!"_

The two young men hurried to prepare for combat. Jaune's mind was racing, trying to find a good way to make a good impression of the other boy. Eventually, he decided to go with the Action Hero route. He pitched his voice down and started with a light verbal jab. "Nice toy you have there Cardin, you make it yourself?"

The larger boy replied with a grunt, which Jaune took as a sign that it was working. Now all he needed to do was beat the guy, and they'd be great friends, or at least frenemies. Either way it was more than he had, so he was going for it.

In short time, the two of them were facing each other in the sparring ring. Jaune glared at the meter when his aura stopped at ninety percent. His aura had been mysteriously dropping from time to time, and he wanted to know why. He quickly put the thought out of his head when Glynda called for the match to begin.

Jaune would like to have said that the battle was over before it even began, but the battle went off the tracks and had to make a pit stop at improv station. The fight began well. Cardin swung his mace downward, and tried to hammer it into Jane's head. The blonde took half a step back, and the heavy weapon slammed into the ground at his feet. His retort was a solid blow with the handle of his sword. It progressed like that for about a minute, then it all went wrong when Jaune failed to account for secondary functions. He foolishly decided that some friendly advice before his victory cemented their friendship. "Thanks for giving me such good practice fighting mindless grimm. You telegraph your attacks, can't feint, and your mace is laughably easy to read. Swinging it around wildly might work on mindless Grimm, but you'll have a hard time hitting anything with a brain."

Cardin grunted in rage, and pressed a button on the handle of his weapon. The crystal on the end of his mace glowed, and the swordsman only had enough time to jump back before he was rocked by the explosion.

The mace user let out a cruel laugh. "You're all talk! Maybe after I beat you I'll visit your girls and show them what a real man can do. Don't worry, I'll take care of your team, and then some."

Jaune rolled onto his feet and calmly dusted himself off. Internally, he was freaking out. Not because he had any fear of loosing the battle, no he was scared for the safety of his soon-to-be friend. _"Is this guy insane? He_ wants _to get involved with those trigger happy girls? Doesn't he realize what he would be getting himself into? Obviously not. As a good future friend, I'll just have to warn him."_

"I appreciate your attempt to keep me on my toes, but I'm afraid you just made a grave error." Jaune raced toward his opponent, low to the ground. Cardin slammed his mace into the ground and the explosion flared up from the ground where he struck. The knight threw his shield, leapt onto it, and used it as a platform to leap over the larger boy's head.

As he came down, he ran his blade down the back of his opponent. Blind to what was happening behind him, Cardin could only apply his aura right above his skin. Unaware of what he had just unintentionally done, Jaune kicked out Cardin's legs from under him, rolled the Winchester over him back, and slammed him into the ground. With his blade at the Winchester's throat, Jaune growled in the coolest way he could, "If you so much as touch any of those girls, I won't be held responsible for what happens. But I can guarantee that after your first attempt, you won't be in any shape to try again."

Laughter from the stands led Jaune to widen his focus to find the source of the humor. He quickly realized that his blade had cut through the Winchester's clothes, and he had inadvertently pantsed the other boy in the process of throwing him.

"That will be enough. Cardin, as you have seen, strength alone is meaningless unless you can hit your opponent. Work on improving your reactions and the range that your aura protects; The grimm will not always be considerate enough to attack from the front. And Jaune…" The woman used her crop to tilt his head, "We will need to have a discussion about this…"

Both boys gulped. Cardin grabbed his pants and ran off to the locker room. Jaune slumped and followed Glynda to her office.

-Glynda's Office-

"Mister Arc, do you know why I want to talk with you?"

Jaune threw himself to his knees, knowing from experience how much it made girls take things easier on him. "I'm sorry, I thought that his aura would protect his clothes as well. It never occurred to me that cutting into his clothes would even be possible."

"It's not about your fight, Mister Arc, but what happened before it even started." The beauty took a seat on her desk. Jaune barely withheld a blush when the angle allowed him to see a glimpse up the teacher's skirt. "Your aura was partially depleted before you even fought. Do you know why?"

Jaune did his best to focus on the woman's face. "I don't know." He could tell from her face that there was going to be a catch coming. "What do I need to do to learn, Miss Goodwitch?"

A shiver ran up the Professor's spine. She lifted one leg and placed it seductively on his shoulder. "Call me Glynda. You know, I was on the same team as your father and mother, though I was two years younger than them. I still remember the first night in the room, the celebration was… heated. You were born nine months later…" She was drooling. "But your father had the same problem. I'll share his solution if you'll pay the same price he did~"

"Umm, I need an adult?"

"Jaune, you're training to be a huntsman; you are an adult. Although, I can make you an adult, if you want~. I bet you're over twice as good as your father was~. Now get over here and give me a massage!"

-Lunchtime-

"Jaune, as your doctor, I have to break the news to you. Your hands are perfectly fine, and therefore you don't have any reason to not give us the same aura massage." Cherri was examining Jaune after his harrowing near death experience at the hands of his desperate teacher. When the two of them emerged from the woman's office, she was practically glowing with health and relaxation, her appearance as if she had just come out of a professional beauty salon. Jaune, on the other hand, looked like he had just lost a fight with a hurricane.

"But they huuuurt! Aura isn't meant to be used that way! My fingers feel like they're going to fall off! She didn't even explain how it was supposed to help with my aura!" While Jaune was busying himself complaining, and inadvertently asking to cuddle, the rest of the group was chatting up the latest gossip and starting the process of exaggerating Jaune's fight to absurd levels.

"How can you effortlessly beat a guy twice your weight without sweat but can't handle how sore your hands get from a mere three hours of massage." The doctor gave a dramatic sigh. "Nurse Cream, Jaune needs some milk."

The blonde's eyes widened. The cow faunus took a seat on his lap before he could escape, and led one of his hands under her shirt. He felt the aura flow into his hand and restore the sore muscles as she urged his hands higher. His aura leapt up at the pleasurable contact, even if he didn't want to admit it. Most of the team was watching and joking, and Vell was setting up a timetable for the team to get their own aura enhanced massages.

The playful atmosphere was interrupted by the sound of jeering coming from a few tables over. Jaune pulled himself out of his daze and quickly took stock of the situation. It was Cardin and his team mocking a rabbit faunus. Blake silently glared at the racist and Pyrrha shook her head. "Absolutely despicable. Someone should teach him a lesson."

"Ooh, can Jaune steal his pants again? Rin says that I'm not allowed to do that after I tried to steal Jaune's in class."

"We should make sure that he doesn't try anything against our Lady-Killer. What do you think Jaune? Jaune?"

The blonde leader had already slipped away and was almost the group of bullies. Cardin reached out the grab his victim's era, but the Arc stopped him. The sound of the grab cut through all of the noise of the cafeteria, and all eyes were on the coming conflict. "Cardin. Do you have no sense of self-preservation? I already gave you one warning, now this is your second. You won't be walking away the next time you try something like this."

The Winchester heir glared at the Arc, then his face split into a wicked grin when he laid a sucker punch into the blonde's gut. Jaune staggered back from the unexpected blow, and was almost immediately blindsided by Russel. Jaune quickly focused his attention to the new threat, but he was blind to the rest of the team.

Fortunately, or perhaps not, the confrontation had attracted the attention of the rest of the faunus girl's team. Cardin was about to throw another punch when a fashionable handbag sent him to the floor. Pointed heel kicks quickly took down Lark and Russel, and Dove quickly surrendered.

The older girl sashayed over to the Arc before lowering her aviators to give him an obvious once over. "Tall, blonde, and rugged; I like. A gentleman and confidant too, already laying a claim to my little Bub-bun." She gave a playful wink and pushed her faunus teammate forward. "The dinner date's at six. Both of you be at the dock by three so I can get you ready. Though, blonde might just look better without his clothes than anything I can get him." Coco gave a playful growl before leaving to plan the embarrassment that she would but her teammate through and the myriad of outfits she could stuff her new unwilling model into.

Velvet was left blushing in the arms of one very confused and distraught Arc. _"But… I just wanted to warn him that bullying this girl would bring her team's wrath down on him, why would he get so mad about that? More importantly, did I just get another girl that will lead to my death if I don't keep her happy? because I think I did. Damnit, I can barely keep up with my team and sisters, why would I want more? Am I at least getting something out of this from Oum?"_

As both Jaune and Velvet were lost in their own little world, they failed to notice the fashionista trade high fives with Vell Arc. "All According to Plan."

 **Chapter 8 done!** Wait, it's done already? And it's long? Did I fall into a time portal with this or something? No, work's just been easy and the ideas have been flowing.

But Monster Hunter is kind of mainstream now, so I can reference all the memes! Nekos, grinding, huge weapons, grinding and absurd monsters. Oh, and grinding.

In other news, Forever Fall and Bunny Boy is planned for next chapter, so stay tuned. Leave a review with thought for how to improve this, or just boosting my frail ego against the cruel buffeting waves of reality. At least this helps me to sound more natural and tame my instinct to constantly add on more clauses. I still blame the Latin.

But that's enough complaining for today, enjoy your day and prepare for the overlap of special days. April fools day is Easter, this is not going to end well, I feel. Noctis Sol, signing off.


	9. Fluff taken too Seriously

**Restoring the Family Honor**

Chapter 9; Fluff taken too Seriously

The real reason Jaune never trained to be a hunter is that he was busy fighting the temptation to be a playboy. It's Jaune vs. his imagined Harem. AU, Some crack.

 **Disclaimer; I don't own RWBY and this is total AU. Enjoy the ride, check author's note at the end for concerns, and kindly leave a review.**

 **This is told primarily from Jaune's perspective, and he is not the most reliable narrator. Other perspectives will likely be equally unreliable. Honnestly, I just enjoy screwing with your minds, it's more fun for me this way.**

 **On with the story.**

-In Media Res-

Velvet burst through the door to the room, Jaune held in her arms. "Medic! Jaune needs help! I don't know what's wrong with him!" She laid the blonde down on a hastily made cot and everyone could see the blood trickling out of his mouth and nose while he was still unconscious. The faunus wiped her eyes and held a hand over her heart. "He protected me. There were so many of them and he protected me with his body. When they finally left I was so relieved that I couldn't help myself but hug him. I didn't even notice that he was bleeding until he sopped moving. I gave him an emergency blood transfusion, but…"

Then everyone's attention was drawn to Jaune's new addition.

Coco was the first to burst out laughing. Most of the group joined, with the exceptions of those who immediately started cooing.

Sitting atop Jaune's blonde head of hair were two fluffy rabbit ears.

Coco slipped an arm around Velvet. "I wasn't expecting this when I agreed to leave you two alone. Less than two hours and you've already made him into your bunny boy-toy. I like your plan; can't wait until heat season, it's going to be wild."

Velvet just put her head in her hands and blushed furiously. She would never admit to agreeing with her team leader in this.

-Previously, Date-

Jaune arrived at the dock seven minutes early, just enough to seem exited without being _too_ eager, clad in a flattering but practical button-up shirt and pants combo. He had calculated everything perfectly to meet expectations at the lowest point without disappointment.

From the scouting reports that Jirai had made him memorize, Velvet was an adorable blob of weaponized shyness and cuteness and had her whole team wrapped around her finger. That is to say, if you did anything to make her cry, no one would ever find the body. The bunny's last boyfriend was only found after three weeks of cowering on top of a tree in Emerald Forest, all because he made the girl cry by forgetting their one-month anniversary. Yeah, she was needy. Unless he was some sort of super-boyfriend with the power of doing only what his girlfriend wanted he would end up suffering the wrath of her team. That is, unless he could skim the bottom of her expectations so that no one could get mad at him and Velvet would let _him_ down gently.

The only snag in this plan was Coco. While Velvet had the low self-esteem to take anything personally and blame herself for a relationship gone wrong, Coco wouldn't accept anything less than total genuine enthusiasm, and could easily see through any farces that the blonde could put up.

So he had to get her away from the date, no matter the cost. He expected to pay for it somehow, but it would certainly be less than what would happen when he accidently did something to make the bunny cry.

Coco and Velvet arrived five minutes to the hour, the former dragging the latter. It was a good sign and bad. Velvet would be easy to deal with, but getting Coco away would probably near impossible. At least for a while. But when the time comes, the fashionista won't even realize she was being played. Just need to figure out how…

"Nice job wrapping yourself Lady Killer; I look forward to dressing you up. You two won't be able to keep your hands off of each other by the end of the night or I'll have to bring you back to our room and make it up to you." She was already well on her way to achieving the first half of her promise. Velvet was dressed in a frilly top that was tight against her bust, but was loose enough to flap up and reveal a tantalizing strip of silk smooth stomach. Below, she was clad in shorts that had been modified to show off a fluffy tail that just begged to be petted. This was going to be more difficult than expected, but that wording put out a hook that he couldn't ignore.

He put his arm around a furiously blushing Velvet and wagged his finger at the other girl. "Shame on you Coco, being such a poor friend to your sexy teammate. Don't you want this date to go well? Why would you try to tempt me away from her?"

The fashionista laughed and struck a provocative pose. "Why would I need to tempt? You already owe me whatever I want as a consultant fee. This pre-date is mine."

Jaune joined her laughter. "Don't set the bar too high! We can't have my actual date getting nervous. Or worse… jealous…"

Velvet let out a few nervous chuckles and clutched her notebook full of date plans. Plans that her leader had all but made for her. "I-I'll do it! I won't disappoint you!"

Jaune pulled her tighter to him, and Coco rolled her eyes. "Silly Bun-Bun. You'll do fine! See, he's already all over you." The fashionista patted her on head before spinning on her heel and boarding the Bullhead. "C'mon! There's shopping to do, and I want to see how you two look in matching outfits!"

-Silk Shell Fashion Shoppe-

Velvet cowered in the changing room. There was no way that she'd survive being seen in this. She'd look like an idiot wearing this, and she still fell short of how nice Coco looked every day.

A knock on the changing room frame filled her with fear. The voice of the owner filtered through the curtain, "Five minute warning, Honey. Looks like your friends are going to start early if you don't get out there."

Velvet tried to throw herself out of the room in a panic, but her feet got caught in the curtain. Her face rushed toward the floor, but the owner caught her before she collided.

The owner gave a soft chuckle. "You're that worried, eh? Don't worry, I taught my niece better than to use her fashion powers for her own benefit on a shared date… though maybe I wasn't the best person to teach her since I stole my late husband from her mother." Velvet gave a worried whimper. "Oh, it won't be so bad! This just gives me some time to give you some advice and some special presents!~"

-With Jaune and Coco-

"Are you sure it's a good idea to leave Velvet alone like that? She looked like she was ready to bolt at the first sign of danger."

"It'll be fine, Aunt Shelly has a soft spot for faunus and hopeless romantics. Plus, the surprise will make the look on your face so much better."

Jaune internally cringed at the scheming smirk on the girl's face. He really needed this girl to duck out before she added anything more to her plans. "Sounds like you have this all planned out; where did you book a room for us?"

That sway in her hips was bad news. The blonde looked to the curtain of the changing room and considered if he could escape and drag Velvet away without much retribution. His thoughts came to a halt when her arms wrapped around his neck. "Won't need one. I told you that you won't be able to hold yourself back. I'll be busy on look-out, so I hope you don't mind if I take mine early…"

Her everything invaded his senses. Her scent was an intoxicating chocolate smell. She pressed her curves against him and he could feel the silk sliding in his hands. Her tongue peeked out and licked his lips. Lost in the moment he opened his mouth. A small part of him thought that he was ready for anything. She showed him otherwise.

She drew back and placed a finger on his lips when he instinctively followed. The digit slipped into his mouth, and Jaune felt a muted shock as the rich flavor coating the finger reached his tongue.

When she withdrew her hand and sucked it herself Jaune stared at her for a moment before a thought struck him how to pay her back. He pushed her against the wall and dove for her neck to mark her. As he drew away he growled into her ear. "You little minx. You're going to have to pay for that in full someday. And here I thought you were supposed to be trying to help your teammate, not steal her date…"

Coco smiled coquettishly as the blonde continued working on a hickey. Everything Vell had told her was true. She could already feel the bond and the extra pleasure flowing to her through it. With a small mental nudge her man moved his mouth to work at her pulse point. As she lavished in the feeling her thoughts wandered to how the faunus was doing with her aunt's gifts…

-Back with Velvet-

The huntress-in-training cowered naked in a corner as the unstoppable monster approached her. Velvet thought that Shelly was a nice and friendly woman, but the truth was the opposite. The woman was a terrible mix of doting mother, teasing sister, and that one ninety year-old neighbor who encourages you to get out more so that she can live vicariously through you.

"Come on Velvet, he'll love this!" The woman was practically singing and dancing in her anticipation. She held a brown and gold backless dress with a dangerously plunging neck-line and a skirt that could best be described as strips of lacy ribbon hanging from her hips. The underwear that went with it was even worse, made to give support while leaving nothing to the imagination. In short, it was incredibly fashionable and terrifying for the shy faunus to wear. Not that she really had a choice against the romance-crazed woman. "We'll start with the perfume, then do up your hair, get you dressed, add another dose of pheromones, add accessories, shorten up the skirt, finish your make-up, add some extra glitter, and then try it out, and if it doesn't work we'll just have to get more daring!"

Velvet whimpered and regretted rejecting the idea of stealing Jaune's clothes for the date.

-Date, Heart of Gold Restaurant-

The Heart of Gold was Vale's number one location for first dates. It had options ranging from casual to formal, with everything in between and beyond accepted and sometimes even expected. The Hostess had seen just about everything, and when she saw the trio of one well-dressed, handsome man with one confidant woman wearing her fashion well and another shy faunus girl blushing and attempting to cover herself she thought she knew what was about to happen. "Welcome to Heart of Gold where we'll make sure your date is ju~st right! Table for three? Would you like a private room, or do you want to show off in the common room? We have rooms set up for every taste?"

Coco took off her aviators and leaned over the hostess' booth. "Long time, no see Goldilocks. I've got a skittish bunny that needs a perfect date and some confidence; what do you suggest?"

The hostess sighed and shook her head now that she recognized her old school friend. And here she thought they were an established couple trying something, or someone, new. "Coco, your plan isn't going to work. Don't you remember what happened when you tried to help out Mint? Or Marsha? Cinnamon? You don't exactly have the best track record of trying to play match maker when you join them on their date! I get that you want to watch and make sure the guy is a gentleman, but you always outshine whatever girl your trying to set up."

The fashionista rolled her eyes. "It's not my fault those guys were scum. They should have known better. I was just being a good chaperone."

Goldilocks leaned forward. "Coco, you made it a point to cut in whenever the girl even started to stutter. How are they supposed to shine if you won't let them breathe? And do I even need to mention the flirting?"

Jaune put a hand on both girls' shoulders. "Ladies, can we just get a table so Velvet can have her date?"

The two ladies rounded on him. "No. Who do you agree with?"

The man sweated externally but was internally rejoicing. "I think I'd have to go with Goldie. Velvet can handle herself, and if anything comes that she can't handle, I'll take care of her. I would rather die than see her hurt." _"I know what you'd do to me would be worse than death."_

Goldilocks looked smugly at her old classmate, and Coco just huffed and turned her attention to look over the boy again. She was about to rebuke when a hand tugged at her sleeve. Velvet was looking at her with wide bunny eyes. "Can I have Jaune to myself? Pleease?"

The elder team leader was overcome by the cuteness and repressed a squeal. "My little Bub-Bun is taking her first steps to womanhood, I'm so proud." She turned her attention to Jaune and gave one last warning. "Alright, Lady Killer, if you want to go without a chaperone, then you need to take responsibility. Since you don't want me pushing, you have to tempt. Your mission is to get Bun-bun to stake a real claim. Don't come back until you're covered in lipstick or, better yet don't come back tonight. Get a room." She turned her attention back to her teammate as she looped her arms around the blonde's neck again, "And I want all the details after you're done. I'm not letting you off the hook. I expect you to be able to do this." Without any other instruction, Jaune had already moved his head down to give her free reign. She moved forward, but was stopped by a finger laid across her mouth.

Jaune had moved back with his face split in a mischievous grin. "turn-about is fair play, Coco."

The fashionista had never felt so tempted to reneg on a promise, but she could hold herself back until the couple got back. The comeuppance for the blonde's trick would be legendary. But at the moment she'd have to make do with responding the same way he had before.

-After Dinner, Park-

" _Everything is going according to plan. Coco is clear, I've been a competent date, and Velvet is just slightly underwhelmed but still satisfied. A few kind words to subtly increase her guilt, show some extra skin, order her favorite desert without asking what it is, and now to top it off with a walk through the park, stargazing, and the classic platonic date closing kiss on the cheek. She'll get back and lay any blame for things going wrong on herself, and I'll get off with a disappointed glare at worst. I feel sorry for her, but things will just end worse for both of us if we go into this relationship with Coco hovering over it. Now, the hill should be just over… -wait, what's that?"_

A large black dog was standing in the middle of the road and growling at them. Velvet pressed herself into his back, whimpering in fear. Jaune took a moment to lace his fingers with hers.

" _No surprise that she's scared, the thing almost looks like a grimm. It probably has a pack waiting somewhere too. Should I stay and defend her? Send her away? Leave together?"_

Things began to fall apart when another growl sounded out from behind the couple. More dogs emerged from the brush surrounding the path. The circle was loose, but the dogs looked vicious.

Jaune let his eyes sweep over the situation. Fighting them likely wouldn't be the best option with their numbers. Giving the leader a solid hit might send him and the pack running, but that might put Velvet in danger or worse, make her feel dedicated to the relationship and leave him with a death sentence if and when her perfect image of him got broken.

The decision was taken from his hands when the head of the pack lunged at the girl. The blonde threw himself in the way and the force brought the trio to the ground. Jaune did his best to flip himself forward to deliver a kick to the dog's gut and a yelp showed that it was a solid hit. What he hadn't considered was the landing. The momentum slammed his face into the ground at Velvet's shoulder. With all of his aura focused on his back and legs he was not prepared for the impact and felt his blood start to leak out.

Unfortunately the pack of dogs didn't give up so easily. More came forward biting and clawing at Jaune's back as he guarded his date.

They stared deep into each other's eyes. For the first time Jaune was struck by how truly beautiful she was. He bit his lip, holding in the pain, trying to be strong for her. His efforts failed, and a flash of pain flickered in his eyes.

Velvet wrapped her arms around him tightly. The raw emotions washed over her and overcame her shyness. Her lips parted and her head moved forward. She captured his mouth. A drop of blood met her tongue. The taste was sweet and her soul joined in singing a harmony with his aura. Light shone out and the dogs scattered in fear at the display.

Velvet unwillingly tried to pull away from the kiss, but Jaune moved with her and continued it, much to her delight. His mouth moved to fulfil her desires without any lead. She moaned and squirmed beneath him, aching for more. She opened her eyes to let him see her pleading.

It took a second for her to process what she was seeing. He was pale and unresponsive. His limbs had gone limp. He was unconscious.

She squeaked and rolled him over. There was blood on his face, but he was at least still breathing. The most important thing would be making sure he had enough blood. She thanked the brothers that her blood type was O as she pulled out her medical kit. She pulled out a syringe, found a good vein in her arm, and filled it. She had to try twice to hit the vein because of her shaking hands.

When she managed to give Jaune the treatment, she sighed slumped down. He gave her this great date, and she couldn't do anything for him. It wasn't like he had no other options, he had every benefit. She almost wished that he was a faunus like her so that she wouldn't have as much competition… or at least then he would have more physical urges that she could help him with. A blush rose to her cheeks as she imagined him as an insatiable bunny boy. Her hand wandered over to his pants, just to get a better picture of what she would work with to repay him…

A groan pulled her attention back to his face for a moment. Then she did a double take. There was a new addition. She frantically searched through her photos for a gurney, or something to get him back to the bulkhead. She was in over her head. She needed to get him to Cream…

-Present-

As the group's laughter settled down, Coco pulled Velvet onto the couch with the rest of the girls who weren't tending to Jaune. "Alright, Bun-Bun, you've made Jaune into a faunus and you'll be helping us turn him into a willing participant in his harem, what's your next move? How do you want to _reward_ him for everything he's done for you?" Velvet blushed and mumbled something. "What's that Bun-Bun? You have to speak up."

The faunus took a deep breath and almost shouted her response. "I want to sleep with him and have his kids!"

The rabbit panted, slightly out of breath, and Coco patted her on the shoulder. "We all do, Bun-Bun, we all do. When a man tastes that yummy, you don't let him go. Vell says it won't be permanent, so that means we should make the most of this opportunity. I always wanted to try a hat trick with a bunny…"

Blake stood off to the side and stared at Jaune's new faunus ears. An idea was forming in her mind.

The White Fang wouldn't know what hit it.

 **Chapter 9 end.**

First thing, the fluff was a pun based on a fluffy bunny tail, sorry if you were disappointed. I'm focused on the humor and plot with romance as a second objective. Also, I'm just not that good at it.

Furthermore, yeah, sorry, I'm just going to skip over forever fall since I replaced that scene with the pack of dogs in the park. Jaune protecting her from a pack of wild dogs seems more likely than a pack of ursa, and it's slightly funnier to see her overreact to a small thing than if the blood transfusion was needed for a real wound. Screw cannon, this is fanfiction. I can skip over major cannon events if I don't have a reason to use them.

Also…

 **Bunny Jaune Hype!**

If only this story was good enough to see some fan-art of that…

When I get to writing the next chapter, I plan to focus on Blake's first White Fang hunt.


	10. Interlude Girls' Night In

**Restoring the Family Honor**

Chapter 9.5; Girls' Night In

The real reason Jaune never trained to be a hunter is that he was busy fighting the temptation to be a playboy. It's Jaune vs. his imagined Harem. AU, Some crack.

 **Disclaimer; I don't own RWBY and this is total AU. Enjoy the ride, check author's note at the end for concerns, and kindly leave a review.**

 **It seems I wasn't as clear on some things as I thought I was, so here is a short interlude explanation chapter.**

-Javlineers Dorm Room-

Ruby shook the little bottle and brought it close to her eyes. After a second, she groaned and set it down to rejoin its siblings. "It's too light!"

Coco looked up from her own toenails and sighed. "Ruby, you're the one who said that our girls night in would be, quote, painting our toenails and talking about cute boys. Yet I detect a general lack of painting toenails or talking about boys from you."

Ruby glanced at the rest of the girls. Almost everyone else was already waiting for their first color to dry and she hadn't even chosen one. She turned her attention back to the older girl. "It's not my fault no one makes a color that matches my hood! It has to be a specific shade of red!"

Coco took one look at the reaper and tossed a bottle to her. "This wasn't really your idea, was it?"

Ruby at least looked slightly bashful. "When I said that we could all have a girls' night without Jaune she sounded really excited for that."

Weiss shouted out from behind her textbook, "I was being sarcastic. You took off before I could say anything else, and now no one is letting me study!"

Coco shook her head and turned her attention to the the Kitsune Arc sister. "Vell, what are the odds for Velvet's date?"

"It's one-to-two that teasing is tossed around but the bunny chickens out, one to one that they kiss but don't go any further, five-to-one that they go all the way, and twenty-to-one that the date goes off without a hitch."

"Are you taking bets that something strange happens?"

"If you'll take one-to-one hundred thousand odds, then sure. His semblance can just do so many weird things if there's enough fluid shared and a desire. There's a legend that Jaune's great grandfather turned into a real horse for a day because his girlfriend wanted to try horse riding. I'm not expecting something like that, but Velvet probably has some rather strong and strange desires. I give it two-to-one that she inadvertently does something weird with his semblance."

"Hmm. I stole a kiss from him earlier, so I could pretty much do whatever I want with him for the next 24 hours, right?"

Vell considered the fashionista for a moment before speaking. "While the duration of his semblance is based on the type of fluid, the intensity is based on the amount. With a short kiss you generally trade enough saliva to give him ideas and maybe get him to do something if he already wanted to do it. If you want your own pony, you'll need to spend a while sucking face. Either that, or suck something a bit further down."

Coco gave an exasperated look. "Aren't you hoping to be the only woman for Jaune? Why do you keep pushing other girls to go for him?"

The kitsune smiled. "You misunderstand. I hope to be his wife and the only supplier of Arc essence. The more girls that get addicted to what he brings, the greater the power I'll wield when I control the source. It's a very fine line, if other girls don't think they have a chance to be with him, they won't try and won't get addicted. On the other hand, I need to keep them fighting with each other so that no one can usurp my position as leader. Or worse, girls that are unworthy will creep in, and it'll end up being my responsibility to deal with the pointless junkies."

Coco rolled her eyes. "You say it like he's some kind of drug. I do get the appeal, but I wouldn't call him addicting."

Vell gave a patronizing smile. "Of course. Of course. After all, why would the essence of a man who will cater to your every whim ever make you dependent, much less when imbibing him gives incredible power." Her face settled into a less joking expression. "But really, it's more of a mutual enslavement, so long as you get close enough. The girl is addicted to him, and his semblance feeds all of her thoughts and desires to him as if they were his own. Jaune does whatever the girl wants because he thinks that is what he himself thought to do, and the girl will want to do anything to make him feel good because his semblance will bring that pleasure to her. It really is an almost flawless system."

Coco sniggered. "The way you describe it… most people would just call that a good marriage. But speaking of relationships, what's with this harem? You already said that you don't plan to share, so how is this even a real harem?"

Vell gained a look of disgust. "It isn't a real harem, technically. It's more of a social group than romantic. Not all of us are content to share a source of nearly unlimited power with any woman who can pin him down for a kiss. I know that Cherri, Hestia, Lorelai, the Belladonna, and Nora all want to be harem queens where they lead but others share his bed. Yang, Rin, Cream, Casandra, and Pyrrha want to enjoy the benefits of being in a harem or just plain don't care so long as they get their fix. Myself and Navy want him without any other girls in the way. Weiss is a spoiled brat who won't take a good thing unless its presented with garnish on a platinum platter; she wants him all to herself but refuses to play the games to get him. Ruby, on the other hand… she's not as innocent as she seems, even if her sister refuses to acknowledge it. She's willing to play, but how far, that I don't know."

Coco had a suspicious look. "Really? Every single girl? Projecting much?"

Vell just shrugged. "What can I say, uncle Jirai does good work. What girl doesn't like tall blonde and loving? If that isn't enough, there's always the fact that he's effectively a noble and incredibly rich. With his semblance he can be anything any girl wants, so long as they get close enough. A woman's aura can sense that's on offer and it will go for it. The Arc gets protection and progeny and in exchange the woman gets her every wish fulfilled. Only real downside is that it makes the Grimm go crazy. The monsters have been trying to kidnap an Arc heir as long back as records were kept. But that's really only a downside if you're doing it wrong. You're supposed to keep him locked at your side with plenty of guards that rely on only what you can give." The faunus had a strange glint in her eye that spoke of burning memories.

Yang's cough pulled her back to the present. The other girls had all gathered around her. "Group therapy time; What disaster did the Arc save you from? Slavery? Abusive parents?"

Vell sighed. "Somewhat and absolutely not. Let's just say that Daddy was a faunus and Mommy was a gang leader. She ran a successful ring in Atlas, so of course she was on the top of the list for ambitious scumbags that didn't like her choice of 'pet.' Her second in command started plotting against my mother from the moment I came out of the womb with a tail. My parents were killed in front of me when I was 6."

Everyone was doing their best to keep a straight face at the emotionally dead delivery of the story. Those who hadn't heard it before averted their faces. "That's when I unlocked my semblance. I was in denial. My soul cried out that they couldn't be gone. No power can bring back the dead, so the brothers answered my prayer in the next best way. I recreated them. Copies. Shadows, false images that could do everything but thought nothing. They beat down those who betrayed me, and I lived in that room with nothing but the corpses of my parents and their killers for one month. It was my own fantasy world where nothing could reach me, and nothing could go wrong. The copies killed anyone who dared even try to break that illusion.

"When Jaune came, I was already almost dead. He was the first one to ignore the copies and headed straight to me. My copies attacked but he didn't even flinch. He held my head in his hands and looked me straight in the eye. I still remember his words, 'These imitations are below you. Give up this illusion. Let's go and make a reality that's better.' I wailed and willed the constructs to attack even more viciously. He didn't move. He didn't cry out. He refused to be hurt by what he saw as illusions. That is what broke me. He saw me alone, felt me alone, smelled me alone, and everything else was fake. He denied every blow and every wound that he received, and he made me believe it too. He destroyed my fantasy world and dragged me with him to remake reality in his image. That is the man I love, and that is the man who is my king, even if he chooses someone else. The one who can shatter every false reality until we reach his dream. I have sworn upon my parents grave that I will either recapture that moment of just the two of us and make it into a lifetime, or I myself will be shattered. I believe in my love for him with the same intensity that he willed against the world I had created. I will do everything in my power to help him change the world, and once the new world has been created, I will make sure that every woman recognizes whatever true reality is left."

Everyone sat in stunned silence for a long minute. Eventually Weiss choked out an objection. "That's impossible! There's no way you could have kept up using your semblance for a full month right after unlocking it! Your aura would be depleted within minutes, especially without Arc to support you. You obviously misremembered and reconstructed a romanticized version of your meeting with the Arc. There's no way he could actually be like that: The entire time I've known him he's been tactless and irritating and… and…"

"And he's been treating you like the total Ice-Queen Tsundere that you are." Vell flicked the shorter girl with a tail. "Leave it to a Schnee to be entirely unable to reconsider a notion once it has been conceived. Let me break down for you why you're good for nothing but a slave and an amusement. Point 1, you know nothing about aura. It's the power of the soul, yet you never even think for a moment that it can be influenced by the soul, or that using your soul to power a forcefield could ever have any negative affects at all. Point 2, You completely fail to realize that Jaune doesn't actually like you, and only puts up with you because he has to. Point 3, You don't even realize that you're being played. Jaune knows your type and is acting to get what he wants, which is your hatred, because its miles better than what passes as love in your twisted family. I don't get what Cherri sees in you. Whatever it is doesn't matter anyway. I look forward to seeing you shattered when the real Jaune emerges in full again."

Yang whistled. "Wow. Bitchy much? Get it? Cuz' foxes are-"

"I get it Xio-Long!" Both Weiss and Vell replied at the same time.

The kitsune looked over the girls who were doing their best to avoid her gaze. "I don't want you pity. Jaune gave me purpose and made me stronger. Be prepared to fight for him. If you won't, then you don't deserve him."

Vell walked away and sat with a huff. Weiss looked around for support before going to sit in a huff on the other side of the room. Blake looked between the two for a moment before approaching the Arc sister. "I know the difference between illusions and reality. Jaune is mine, but I'll still let you join us once I win."

The two faunus smiled at each other for a single moment. They both understood. They couldn't give up their anchor. Lines would be drawn, but everyone in the room understood that they would need to fight for a place with the Arc heir and a portion of the power that he gives.

 **Chapter 9.5 Done**

There were some things I wanted to clarify quickly. The events happen in the way they are described, but character interpretations may be wrong. The girls will allow others a taste, but many won't allow free access to Jaune for just anyone.

Jaune's faunus transformation is temporary. About a week/ one maybe two chapters. The urges will keep building, but that's the nature of the story.

One thing that I bring up briefly is the aura thing. Flavor wise it's the light of your soul, yet they don't do anything with that flavor. Why? Disappointing…

On a closing thought, how did this get so serious? This was supposed to be a lighthearted mini chapter two answer three questions and have some fun with imagining a girls' night in for huntresses. It ended up with a depressing backstory reveal and hostility. Wow. Next chapter will return with more humor. Until then, stay tuned and leave a review with a question or thing to improve.


	11. Crossover? Why not!

**Restoring the Family Honor**

Chapter 10; Cross-over that Write Themselves

The real reason Jaune never trained to be a hunter is that he was busy fighting the temptation to be a playboy. It's Jaune vs. Harem. AU, Some crack.

 **Disclaimer; I don't own RWBY and this is total AU. Enjoy the ride, check author's note at the end for concerns, and kindly leave a review.**

 **This is told primarily from Jaune's perspective, and he is not the most reliable narrator. Other perspectives will likely be equally unreliable. Honnestly, I just enjoy screwing with your minds, it's more fun for me this way.**

 **On with the story.**

-In Media Res-

Roy Mustang, the Flame Huntsman. The only faunus in Vale's military high command. Famed for wiping out a group of human supremacists that wanted to reignite the violence of the Faunus Rebellion. He was a man of contradictions, praised as a genius by some, a madman by others, but most people who see him on the street think him a fool. Men considered him a playboy in the making, women wanted to know if he lived up to his namesake, and his underlings were loyal to the extreme. Half the council of Vale saw him as an answer to their faunus problems, while the other half saw him as part of the problem. There were hundreds of views and identities that he could put on and take off at a moment's notice. But there was one identity that he secretly carried along with him always: he was also a member of the White Fang. And for Blake, that was a problem.

" _This… THIS is our inside man in Vale?! The man that Adam claimed as his only equal?"_ Blake sat dumbfounded as the man posed her Jaune with a bitch faunus. _"Two highly trained operatives show up for a meeting and the first thing he thinks to do is take some pictures."_ No, she wasn't just mad that a random dog was used for the shoot rather than JAUNE'S ACTUAL PARTER! And the fact that it would take days for the dog smell to wash off of Jaune. And the fact that she was right in front of a man who surely recognized her as Adam's partner. And the fact that she was somehow talked into wearing a tiny miniskirt and Jaune wasn't even looking at her.

"Perfect! Now hold her up and we'll get a shot angled from below."

Jaune blinked in confusion. "But she's wearing a skirt. If I hold her up-

"No, it's perfect, Hawkeye, take the shot."

The woman sighed but put her finger on the button. "Colonel, I almost wish you meant that the usual way…" A flash of light covered the area.

-Rewind; Morning after the Date with Velvet-

Suddenly waking up as a faunus was not something that Jaune ever expected to happen to him, but he quickly found that he was unnervingly fine with the whole situation. Sure he wasn't a racist, but suddenly waking up to find that your race had changed overnight should have thrown him off at least a little. Maybe it was just the different hormones.

" _Okay, go through the facts, what are the real differences between humans and faunus. The faunus certainly aren't animals, but their instincts and urges are far stronger and subject to easy manipulation. That might be a problem, what are rabbits known to do? They run fast and… multiply like rabbits… Well that desire is hardly going to be different than normal, stupid hormones. What else? The animal additions are extremely sensitive, both a plus and a minus. The extra senses and night vision should be really helpful, but damage and overstimulation can cripple them. I can defend against those attacks with aura, but faunus tend to have less usable aura since more is used in support of their bodies… What else is there… Oh yeah, faunus girls go into heat once a month, and faunus men turn into psychotic stalkers if their crushes aren't returned… They totally made those last two up, right?"_

Something shifted against his chest. It was only then that Jaune noticed he wasn't alone in bed. " _Damn, I must really be out of it. I should have been able to notice someone climbing into bed even if I was knocked out."_

He cracked one eye open and was greeted by a pair of adorable cat ears which his lower head really though would look better twitching in ecstasy. He tried to scoot away before he did something stupid.

But Blake couldn't allow that, now could she?

Ribbons lashed out and pulled him tighter to his captor. Blake ran one hand over his chest as the other found her page. "Good Morning _Partner_ ," The excitement in her voice made him shiver. "It's Saturday, and I have you booked for the whole weekend. We're going to start with volume three, page 134, and work our way up to infiltrating the White Fang's operation, and finish with a Private room and some sushi served special style."

His new ears twitched. "Blake… I don't even know where to begin… Wait, actually, yes. I veto your idea of page 134 entirely; I didn't actually enjoy it the first time, and I'm not going to pretend again. If we're doing anything it's got to be 369. And you're going to need to define special style; which one of us has to lay down while the other eats? And finally, if we're going to infiltrate anything, I'm going dressed as a normal person, no fetishistic wear for me; you look better in it anyway. And I said all the out loud, didn't I? Huh… being a faunus apparently dampens your brain to mouth filter. I guess they were right about some things."

Blake let a lewd smile split her lips. She brought her lips to Jaune's new ears and blew. The shiver that went down his spine was all the consent that she needed.

-Room Javlineers-

Ruby glared at the comic book page. The last page to be precise. The last page of last week's issue. Why didn't she have this week's issue, you may ask? Obviously because her partner and team leader couldn't keep himself out of trouble long enough to go with her down to Vale to get it. Ruby had been putting off the trip all week just so she could spend some time with her friend. But that changed now! She had a whole team of friends, and they were all going to enjoy some time together, Jaune or no!

She threw the comic book and struck a dramatic pose. "Everyone! As assistant team leader, I declare that we're all going to have a team bonding exercise in Vale!"

Nora bounced up to answer the call. "ooh! Is this going to end up like last night? I want to make more of those bottles explode!"

Rin quickly moved an arm to calm his partner. "Nora, we aren't allowed to leave Beacon until we clean up the mess you made in the cafeteria, and the auditorium, and the training room. Furthermore, Goodwitch is picking us up in five minutes to clean her office. We'll have to sit this one out."

Hestia spoke up for the huddle of the six Arc sisters present. "All of us are going to be busy, so no go on the party. Jaune woke up, and the catgirl has him for the first weekend. I drew the short straw so I'm stuck keeping an eye on them, Navy has to run the ship to Vale, and everyone else has got lessons to plan."

Ruby's smile had already turned to a frown as she turned to Pyrrha. The champion had snapped to attention at the idea of Jaune and Blake on a date, but quickly blushed and hid behind one of Blake's books when she felt the reaper's eyes on her. A small shake of the champions head left Ruby down to

Before Ruby even had a chance to ask, Weiss was already in her face with a refusal. "I refuse, and you aren't dragging my partner out either! I'm already behind my schedule with all of the noise you were making last night, and can't afford to waste time on something so silly and childish-"

Yang's hand quickly silenced the Heiress. "Don't mind her Ruby, we wouldn't miss it for the world! And I've already made it my mission to teach the little _Weiss_ Princess how to have fun, so no way is she backing out! We'll have enough fun for everyone, right?"

Ruby brightened up and hugged her sister. "Yeah! We'll go read comics, eat cookies, and visit that Milk Bar you talked about! What was it called again? Junior's?"

Yang glanced around and laughed nervously. Weiss had somehow developed an even more disapproving look after hearing that bit of news. "Yeah, about that Sis… Um… They don't open until night so we can't go! How sad! We'll just have to go somewhere else! So let's get going!" The blonde dragged the other two girls out of the room before anyone else latched onto the name and informed Ruby of where her Sister had really been spending her time. Her little sister did not any ideas from anything even remotely involved with those kinds of places.

Hestia waved the three girls off. "You go on ahead. I'll call Navy and let her know to get the ship ready. I'll be right after ya." Once the door closed, Hestia returned to the huddle. "And we're sure he hasn't figured anything out yet? He must suspect something with him turning into a faunus and all."

Cherri casually waved off her concern. "He should be far too busy dealing with the Belladonna and controlling his new hormones to spend the necessary time to ponder what caused his transformation. And until the week is out, he will continue to be extra sensitive to distractions of a physical or carnal nature, so I propose that we all take the opportunity to strengthen the links we have with him. Since it'll be his first time as a faunus we'll start him out with only the Belladonna for the weekend, then two of us when he gets back Sunday, and at least four Each day of the week to keep the edge off. With that we should be able to keep him under our control and override any attempts to steal him away. There's nothing to be nervous about."

Hestia's wings flapped in agitation. "I just have a bad feeling about something. What about tomorrow? Is everything prepared to prevent withdrawal? Cream took the blood samples while he was out, right?"

Cream glanced around to make sure no one was paying attention before leaning closer and pulling two things. The first was a bent needle, the second a glass bottle. "So I've got bad news and good news. Bad news is that Bunny wished really hard that nothing could hurt Jaune, and that apparently includes needles. Good news is I was able to do the next best thing and milk out some bottles of sweat. We'll need to sip it throughout the day but so long as no one gets greedy-"

Cream's explanation was cut short by Nora crashing into the circle and snatching the bottle from Cream. "Ha Ha! I knew you were hiding more of this tasty soda! I already drank all of the stuff in the fridge and I just can't stop!"

The sisters stared in a combination of shock and horror as Nora chugged the last bottle of "Arc Reserve." As an Irate Glynda floated away the hyperactive ginger, the reality of what happened began to set in.

"We're not going to be able to hide the addiction, are we?"

Hestia stood up and stumbled out of the door in a daze. "Gotta get Jaune… Gotta get Jaune before it gets bad…"

-Bullhead Dock-

Navy was dreaming.

She liked to dream. All of her dreams, good or bad, always had one thing in common; she could still walk.

As if summoned by the thought, the scene flashed in front of her again. Her, another no-name orphan girl taken in by the Arc family, was going to go meet the Arc heir.

Sure, it wasn't because she was invited, but she was confidant that once she got there it would be love at first sight with Prince Arc.

A girl can always dream.

But where other girls only dreamed, she was putting hers into action! A stroke of luck led to her overhearing the latest combination for the gate at the Arc manor, which left the forest road to the manor as the only obstacle. She was a strong thirteen year old and she had her aura unlocked. It didn't help.

It started out with the sound. She heard the clashing of steel on bone and rushed forward to help whoever was being attacked. The scene revealed itself as she rounded a corner. A prince in shining white armor fighting an Ursa. The two were almost evenly matched, both sporting a few painful cuts.

She reached for her weapon, and only then did she realize she left the dorm without it.

The grimm batted aside the distracted boy and charged its new target.

She was barely able to turn around before the beast brought her to the ground and began laying into her back with vicious strikes. It was only a matter of seconds before her aura broke.

In the dream her screams were silent.

Before the pain made her black out, she could still remember her prince crying over her wounded body. He saved her at the last second…

As the dream continued, more and more events flashed to the front of her mind; hearing the news that she would never walk again, her attempts at recovery, Jaune holding her up as he danced with her, her single undying wish to be able to MOVE!

It could be said that her semblance granted her wish, in a way, but not the way she wanted. The gods truly did have a sense of humor…

The sound of knocking pulled Navy from her sleep. "Fell asleep at the workbench again… just need that final breakthrough on the synthetic nerves and it'll be done…" Whoever was at the door knocked again, louder and faster this time. How long had they been knocking?

A button opened the door as she worked at wheeling herself around to face her visitors. "Good Morning!" Any traces of her mood had been wiped form her voice. For whatever reason, people just didn't feel safe if they knew their pilot was tired and stressed, as well as crippled.

Hestia took up most of the doorway, but she could see three other students behind her. "Jaune's in Vale on a weekend date with the cat and we don't have any reserves."

The gravity of the situation quickly struck her stronger than any coffee. "This could be a disaster. Do we know their date plans?"

Ruby fidgeted awkwardly in the background. "Umm, why is it so bad that Jaune's going to be gone for the weekend?"

"Nothing you need to worry about!" Both of the Arc sisters replied together in a way that told everyone that they should definitely be worrying. "We'll take care of it before it becomes a problem!" Their tone was saying that they didn't think they would.

Hestia took a deep breath to calm down before continuing. "Look, you all secretly snuck in some time to make out with our no-longer sleeping beauty last night, right?" Yang nodded proudly, Ruby shyly, and Weiss's blush combined with her vehement denial showed that she did. "Then you'll be fine for the day. If we don't find Jaune today, then It'll be a problem and I'll warn you."

The three students had to question just what they had gotten themselves into.

-Vale, Date-

"Okay, seriously Blake? You didn't have any plan to actually find the White Fang, did you?"

The look on Blake's face could almost be considered embarrassed. "These things take time. You can't just shout that your being mistreated for being a faunus and expect them to show up. You need to know a guy who knows a guy, who will give you a message in code that will lead you to an empty warehouse, where you'll find the second clue which will lead you to a guy in a back alley, who you'll need to give the password, which will take you to a hidden hanger where you'll need to show your dedication to the cause, so you can advance to the second warehouse where we'll pretend to launch a police raid to see if they surrender or fight, and only if they prove themselves there will they be allowed to join the real assemblies of the White Fang."

"Yeah, that might be a cool device for a story, but no group in the history of ever has actually tried something that stupid. They'd never have any members. So, know what? I'm gunna try your first idea. HELP! I'M BEING OPPRESSED FOR BEING A FAUNUS! OH, HELP ME WHITE FANG!"

Blake sent him a cold glare as a group of police uniforms approached them. The look quickly changed when she realized that the people in the uniforms were faunus. It changed again when one of the group picked both of them up and began carrying them under his arms.

"THIS METHOD OF RESCUING THE OPPRESSED HAS BEEN PASSED DOWN THE ARMSTRONG LINE FOR GENERATIONS!"

Blake internally groaned. _"Of course he would get picked up by THEM! This is going to painful but at least we're in."_

-On the Bullhead-

Weiss, Yang Ruby and Hestia all sat in awkward silence as Navy argued with the air traffic controller in the CCT. Eventually it became too much for Yang. "So… Hestia… Do you like hot wings?"

The dragon faunus turned her attention to the blonde brawler. "Was that just a joke, or was it a roundabout way of asking for my life's story?"

Weiss tried to cut it off become it got started. "That won't be necessary, we can imagine based on your sister's tale last night."

"I was born in a cold log cabin on a Schnee Mining site."

"Didn't you hear what I said, your story, while I'm sure it will be very tragic and touching, is not necessary."

"No one there was happy so the Grimm were a constant problem. The Schnees would never hire a huntsman for a mere outpost of a mine, and everyone who lived there was too poor to hire anyone themselves."

"We really don't need-"

Yang interrupted her partner's interruption. "Shh. I want to know where this is going."

"we had to make do with a squad of security guards, before that was cut to four, then to two, then to one, before we were left to fend for ourselves. The overseer of the mine came up with the idea of the Culling Sacrifice. One person would be locked in a vault out in the woods. We'd fill it with as much dust as we could spare, then the person would be left to starve and attract as many Grimm as possible. They are supposed to hold for as long as possible and activate the dust at the last moment to burn as many monsters as possible into so much smoke."

Yang gave a whistle of appreciation. "That's hardcore. Bet Lady Killer found that _hot._ "

Hestia slammed her fist into the side of the bullhead. "It was execution! The first "sacrifice" was my father, the leader of the faunus in the camp. The mine manager came up with that idea right after he found my dad radioing the White Fang for support and supplies. I was the second when I protested. The bastard sure was surprised when my semblance manifested and let me absorb the fire."

Weiss cried out again, desperate to salvage at least a shred of respect for the company her father ruined. "The whole of the SDC cannot be held responsible for the corrupt actions of one mine manage! I'm certain that if this were brought to light he would be suitably punished."

Hestia chuckled grimly. "He was punished… by the White Fang. The group that came wasn't interested in helping us, they just cared about getting back at the humans. They herded the human workers into the mines and tried to collapse it on them, completely ignoring the face that the faunus needed to work those mines to live too, and topped it off by killing my mother when she objected. Her scales were all under her clothes, so they thought she was human; Therefore she deserved to die. Then Jaune arrived. Was there to save Cherri and Cream, but he made time for us. He showed more care for me than anyone outside of my family had shown my whole life. Of course I took Jirai's offer to join the Arcs."

Weiss seethed in rage. "Another one? Did he go around looking for girls to seduce?"

Hestia gave her a blank look. "Seriously? You haven't figured it out? Jirai didn't make us Arcs for no reason. So stop; think. You know his semblance, surely you heard the rumors about his parents, and then you add in seven beautiful girls with the same last name, what do you get?"

Yang was the one who answered, "Wait, you were supposed to be his harem? I thought that just sort of happened after Jirai told you about his semblance."

"The Arcs run an orphanage already, why would he choose to specially adopt seven girls if all he was going to do was make them playmates for the Arc heir? He could have easily just made us tutors or let him stay in the dorms. No, we're his brides too, at least we will be when the Arc Rings are finally recovered."

Brushing off the ending Weiss focused on the most important fact. "So he's been knowingly cheating on me this whole time?"

Hestia threw up her hands. "He's not yours! He didn't even realize that we were supposed to be his harem! He was the one who created the idea that we were supposed to be his sisters and once he told everyone that, well, we aren't technically married yet without the rings and saying that he was wrong would make him seem stupid and would open the doors for anyone who thought that they could fool him! Jirai tried to correct him when he first introduced us as his brides, but apparently Jaune didn't get the sarcasm."

Navy let out a scandalized gasp from the cockpit, as if someone told her that her puppy from ten years ago didn't actually go to life on a farm but was actually dead. "That was sarcasm?! I thought that tone was his 'of course, stupid' voice!" As every stared at her she felt the need to defend herself. "Well, they're very similar, aren't they? Both of them have that condescending edge. Wait, does that mean he was being sarcastic when he told me it was a good idea to try to walk through Grimm infested woods without a weapon? Are faunus really exactly the same as humans except in the ways that they aren't? Is hand-holding really the most lewd and depraved thing a couple can do? I don't know anymore, everything I know is wrong!"

"…Just… How? … No… let's… land and try to find Jaune. He'll make everything make sense again."

As the group fell into a befuddled silence, Ruby piped to add to the confusion. "So would dragon-slayer be a better fit for Jaune with Yang, with Hestia, or the three of them together?"

-Blake-

The feline faunus was starting to believe the old adage about black cats and bad luck. Here she sat in front of one of the few people that could send her back to Adam, and she didn't even have the benefit of her favorite blonde at her side. No, she had to put up with an obnoxious monkey faunus stalker that made her sick every time he tried to flirt with her. "Why am I here again?"

Mustang was smirking at her distress. The bastard. "This stowaway claimed to be with you."

Her stomach recoiled at the thought. "I have literally never seen him before, and I honestly think that's rather racist of him, thinking that I'll be on his side after he broke the law just because I'm also a faunus. Shameful really."

The monkey just had to voice his disappointment. "Come on, don't be like that. I just didn't want to lose track of you while I was detained so I told them you were with me so I'd be able to follow you until you acknowledged me. That's not weird at all!"

Both Roy and Blake spoke at one. "Yes, it is."

-Jaune-

"So, you're telling me there's a five hundred thousand Lien betting pool going on for what Mustang's faunus trait is? How does that even work? Do you get anything for discovering what it is?" Jaune waved at the diagram slash betting chart that took up one of the walls in the office. The diagram was crudely drawn and was supposed to represent the Colonel with people adding what faunus traits they thought he had as the mystery went unsolved.

Havoc, a lion faunus with nasty claws, took a look at the chart and let out a long suffering sigh. "Yeah, Hugh started that when he was drunk and everyone just kind of joined in. A lot of my past girlfriends came in and cast their vote while giggling at their choice. We'd always break up soon after that."

Jaune took a closer look and noted the long list of female names under the arrow pointed to Mustang's crotch. "How much is the buy-in, I think I have it figured out."

Fuery piped up. "That's amazing! We've all been guessing since Hawkeye won't tell us and everyone's too scared to ask him directly."

Jaune bathed in the atmosphere. _"Is this what it feels like to have guy friends and hang out? Feels cool. Maybe I'll sneak on down to Vale more often to hang out…"_ "Yeah, when he and Hawkeye were escorting me, I noticed that there was a small bulge in his shirt at the small of his back. Combine that with the straight razor I saw in the trash in his office, and I place my bet on his having a horse's tail that he keeps trimmed."

Fuery and Havoc looked at each other and muttered at the unfairness of their boss having his faunus trait so easy to hide. Then the moment of male camaraderie was broken by the sound of the door doing the same. "SUCH PASSION! SUCH SKILLFULL OBSERVATION!" The giant frame of Alex Armstrong entered the room and tore his shirt in passion and began to leak MANLY TEARS. "YOU TRULY EXEMPLIFY THE TRAITS THAT WE WISH THE GROW THROUGHOUT THE WHOLE WORLD!"

Jaune took a moment to consider what sort of faunus the man was. _"Maybe a walrus? He has a mustace…"_ "I'm touched, but why are you here?"

The large man calmed down and grabbed another shirt from a locker in the room to redress himself. "Mustang will meet you in the large, conveniently empty warehouse next door. He said he had the perfect idea of what to do with you."

" _Well that sounds ominous…"_

-White Fang Warehouse-

"Permission to speak freely, Colonel?"

"Permission granted."

"I don't know why you're doing this Roy. It's incredibly risky; If Adam catches wind of you withholding information about the Belladonna, he'll let out your secret and your position in vale will be compromised. Furthermore, are you even certain that this Arc is actually the heir? Many of the children that come from their orphanage take a derived last name after all."

Roy looked off into the distance, recalling a memory. "Hawkeye, there's a saying that was passed down from the days of the great war. There are multiple variations, but the one that struck me the most was; 'If you ever come against an Arc with a harem, you're on the wrong side. Save yourself the humiliation, scatter your men, send over your women, and castrate yourself with a silver spoon.' I've already made my choice to oppose the new ordering of the White Fang, I'm not going to turn back now that the power to topple it is within my grasp. Now, who do you think we should have pose with him for the pictures? I think a dog faunus would be ideal, how about you?"

Hawkeye refused to comment.

-Vale-

"WHERE ARE THEY!?" The four girls had been searching Vale all day to no avail. No one seemed to remember seeing a blonde bunny boy walking around no matter where they went or who they asked. They thought they found a lead when they heard of the police chasing a blonde faunus, but were soon disappointed to learn that it was a monkey, not a rabbit. And now, as the sun began to set, they were nearly at their wits' end. Hestia grabbed her hand to stop it from trembling. "Where are they? Did something happen? Did we push him too far and now he ran away?"

Yang squashed similar thoughts rising in her head and placed a hand on the dragon's shoulder. "I think it's time you told us why this search is so desperate."

Hestia pushed back her tears of distress and frustration. "You've been feeling good the last few days, right? Pleasant buzz tingling away from your head down to your crotch? That's Jaune's semblance feeding you. However, once you get a taste of that pleasure, you don't give it up easily. Addiction and withdrawal aren't exactly the best descriptors, but it gives you the idea. If Jaune were with us, our souls would push us to renew the link, but since we can't do that when he isn't here… what happens when you give a starving man a buffet then try to take it away from him? Civility doesn't exist in the face desperation, and absence only makes the heart more possessive."

The girls stood frozen in shock, each of them contemplating it in her own way. Eventually Yang raised her voice, "Let's keep looking, there's one more place that I want to ask. You're in Luck Ruby, we're going to Junior's."

-Jaune-

The Arc heir collapsed onto his bed too exhausted to even care about Blake's possessive cuddling to his side. He had spent the entire day getting introduced to Mustang's crew and their fighting styles under the supervision of the "Human type Faunus" Armstrong. The Colonel obviously knew something and had some kind of plan, but what it was, the blonde didn't know yet. He almost wished that the monkey faunus would have stuck around, but the guards shooed him away to hang out in some sleazy sounding bar.

His own yawn reminded him that he still had to make an appearance at the docks for some event at midnight. As he fell asleep, he really hoped that Blake had a plan for why she was doing this, because it really wasn't working out to be a great date.

Almost as soon as his eyes shut, Jaune felt something open them. As he took in his new surroundings, he could help but feel that he had been here before, even though everything was unfamiliar.

"So, how was your first day as a bunny boy? I told you it would happen, didn't I?"

Jaune rolled to his feet and faced the Narrator. "So what? Is this just something to make my life more interesting because you got bored?"

The man waved off the accusation. "No, it's much deeper than that. I needed to show a bit more of the power of your semblance, as well as add a twist to some of the overdone scenes. This really is all for your benefit."

"Thanks? I don't feel that way, but sure."

"Oh, don't worry, I'll probably cut it short from the week that's the maximum, but the important thing is how it affects your development. Once your team-mates and sisters come meet you, their hearts all the fonder for your short absence, you won't be able to resist them, and you'll fall further under their sway. This will leave you feeling frustrated at your apparent backslide in ability and desperate for someone who can help you achieve your dream… And I'll give her to you. From there, the climax can already be seen."

"I'm slightly worried now. Can't I just do more interesting things and avoid all of that?"

"'Life is a long path/ illumed by the sun. In front is shadow/ behind is the soul. The shadow reaches/ where the body blocks. Your choices differ/ Where darkness falls.' What do you think? I fell into a well while I was writing this, it was deep."

"Yeah, I don't get it and there wasn't really a meter to that, so I'll pass."

The Author gave a harrumph. "Fine, be that way, I guess I'll have to give my foreshadowing the boring way. Just remember that soul, aura, and semblance are more closely tied than most people think. Now then, enjoy your night at the docks."

A sudden terror seized Jaune as he awoke. He would have to make a very important decision tonight, he could feel it in his bones…

 **Chapter 10 done!** I can see the ending! This story is within five chapters of finishing! But yeah, Jaune is going to get more serious leading to the finale. I'm going to peel back some of the comedic layers, have more action, and f-ing **dance** through the events of cannon. This story has a defined path and it must walk it before it can enjoy its harem.

In other news, yes I'm evil leaving you with a cliffhanger like that, but it's going to be such a huge turning point from cannon that I want to be able to explore it in full next chapter.

Also, WOW, this is at ten (official) chapters already? When I came up with this idea, it was going to be a goofy little story that didn't go anywhere. Now it has hype and is building for a climactic ending!


	12. Season Finale!

**Restoring the Family Honor**

Chapter 11; To Decide One's Path

Which is more important; being recognized as a hero, or actually being one? Major AU, Plot central Harem, The Most serious Crack You'll Ever Read.

 **Disclaimer; I don't own RWBY and this is total AU. Enjoy the ride, check author's note at the end for concerns, and kindly leave a review.**

 **Honestly, I just enjoy screwing with your minds, it's more fun for me this way. Belief or Disbelief rests with you.**

 **On with the story.**

-Junior's Bar-

Sun sat at the bar of The Club nursing a drink. The police had really gotten on his case when they caught him still hanging around that warehouse, and he never did pay for his boat ride over. So, he quickly slipped away once he had an idea where he could meet the cat faunus again and make another first impression. It wasn't stalking, he was just getting ready to accidentally run into her on purpose! And plus, she was totally his type, and what did that other guy have that he didn't? They were both blonde faunus, so it was pretty much an even playing field, right?

His musings were cut short by the sound of shotgun blasts just outside the door of the club. The sound of gunfire faded, and was replaced by a scream as the body of the bouncer broke through the doors and flew through the club. Sun tried to force his drink down as a blonde huntress with flaming hair made her entrance. "All right, where is he? The Blonde Faunus?"

Junior gave a heavy sigh and gestured at the blonde monkey trying to sneak away.

There was a moment of hesitation as the monkey faunus looked back and that was where everything went wrong for him. Almost before he knew what was happening, Sun was already down on the floor with the flaming huntress's weapons pointed at his face and crotch. When he looked to the bartender for help, he noted that Junior had seized the opportunity of his distraction and fled.

The girl's scowl said it all. "Alright, we just lost of last best lead because of you, so you're either going to help us by leading us to the White Fang, or by being my punching bag until I feel better."

Sun foolishly decided to try using humor to escape the situation. "Geez, that time of the month?" He wouldn't even deny that he deserved the punch the face, but the crotch shot was totally unnecessary. "Okay! Okay! They threw me out before I could follow my ribbon girl and her boyfriend to where they are now." He noted the blonde cocking her gauntlets for another volley and sped up his speech. "But I know where they will be! Docks! Midnight! They're doing a hit on a shipment of dust!"

He let out a sigh of relief when the crazy girl let him stand up, only to squawk when a collar fastened itself around his neck. He looked behind him to see a large dragon faunus and younger girl in a red cloak standing next to her holding the leash. "There Ruby, now you have a pet monkey so we don't need to bring your dog into the room."

Ruby shuffled nervously. "I don't know… this seems kind of mean…"

The Weiss waved off the younger girl's concerns. "He basically admitted to stalking Blake just now. I'd consider keeping him on a leash to be the most humane option."

Sun finally found his voice. "This is racist!"

The faunus girl patted his head like he was a puppy that just got hit in the face by a Frisbee. "Silly monkey, I'm not doing this because you're a faunus. I'm doing it because you're a male faunus. It's not racist, it's sexist."

Sun was at a loss for words, but that didn't stop him from speaking. "dbwa? Dees wheeway?"

The blonde that was threatening him before came back with a strawberry sunrise that she got from… somewhere. "Silly non-magically-enhanced-harem-endless-pleasure-toy, you never learned that girls are always right, did you?"

Weiss gave a sigh at the pathetic sight. "And to think the White Fang are just idiots like these…"

Sun had a very bad feeling about this…

-White Fang-

The White Fang was almost ready to move out. They were hiding their features with dark cloaks, and the two "guests" were station at Mustang's right and left. The man himself glanced between his watch and the contingent of terrorists that he was sending to their arrest. Adam Taurus had contacted him earlier and insisted that a number of the Bull's most fanatical followers from the camp outside of Vale join the operations inside the city to "boost his numbers." Mustang knew that they were really supposed to push him to be more active and vicious; the horse faunus was one of the few hold-overs from the old White Fang philosophy, and really only kept his position in the fang because of his position in the Vale military.

But now with the Arc scion on his side, that would change very soon. The first step would be to orchestrate the capture of Taurus's men, as well as Torchwick if possible. That would force Adam to come to Vale himself to make up for the losses, which would bring the Bull face to face against the Arc.

But his plan hinged on one inciting incident, which would take perfect timing to make look coincidental. "Hawkeye. What time are the guests arriving?"

She understood the need for secrecy as much as he did. "Twelve Oh three. One minute variance." Needed to have the boy at the location three minutes before midnight with only a minute as the margin for error. It would be tight; he would have no concerns if it were his own men he was commanding, but who knew how Taurus's crew would react.

"We need to be there on time men, the less opportunity there is for things to go wrong the better." The order should have been unnecessary, but some of the newcomers already looked like untrained dogs brought to a show in mating season. "Let's get moving. We need to take a specific route to avoid detection."

But of course his attempts at maintaining order were shot to hell when a vagrant teen dashed into the back street where they were gathered. Without any visible faunus traits, the more extreme White Fang members jumped on him before he even had the chance to stop and turn around.

"Look, he's got white hair! Maybe he's a bastard Schnee! I say we gut 'im and hang 'im up at the docks!"

"Nah, that's too quick for human scum. We need to make him suffer like humans made us suffer!"

Jaune put a hand on the ringleader's shoulder. "Don't. Leave him alone. That's not the sort of reputation that you want to give the White Fang."

The leader, some ugly as sin bull-dog faunus, growled. "Oh, don't tell me you're a human lover? Don't have the guts? C'mon, I'll loan you my gun, it feels great to get back at those filthy humans for mistreating us."

Mustang internally winced. These men had no impulse control when it came to humans, it seemed. He briefly considered if Adam was secretly just trying to unload some useless members of his team onto the city commander, but he put the idea away. Outside of the city, the White Fang was had nothing to do other than stew in their hatred of humanity and push others to more extreme views. The was one of the first things wrong with Adam's group, but the time to fix all the errors of his organization was not right then. Immediate discipline was needed if he wanted to keep the Arc on his side and the plan on track.

Mustang spoke, and the response came at the same time as the command. Precise shots struck each of the White Fang members. They all had their aura unlocked, but without training it was hardly a perfect defense. They would all have bruises, at least for the rest of the night. Mustang gave a nod of appreciation to his lieutenant, Hawkeye had even made sure to strike them only on the upper body. It would have been a detriment if they were actually going to be loading anything tonight, but for his plans, it worked perfectly.

"I don't care what Taurus allows you to do out in the wilds, but when you're in the walls, you follow my rules. We are only allowed to operate with the freedom we have if we maintain a low profile." His face shifted to a glare. "And that is worth more than a few undisciplined soldiers. Now move!"

The bulldog decided to press his luck. "Oh, so the great Mustang is a human lover too! Wait till-"

Whatever else he was going to say was cut off in a roar of flame. Blake hid behind Jaune as she witnessed the ruthless efficiency that made the Flame Huntsman so feared.

When the flames died down, the protesting faunus fell to his knees. The dregs of his aura had mostly protected him. Then, in a show of foolhardy defiance, he raised his gun to shoot the Colonel. He pulled the trigger. No bullet came out. Instead the weapon exploded in his hands, piercing him with lethal shrapnel.

Jaune let out a breath. _"The idiot didn't stop to think about the state of his weapon. He assumed that since he had to aura to protect himself, it automatically flowed into his weapon. Basically the same way that I beat Adam back then. Looks like his men learned well from their leader._ " He gave a mental chuckle. The comradery felt good. Mustang knew what he was doing, even if Jaune was only guessing on some of his plan.

"I told you, freedom of operations is more important than a few poorly trained soldiers. Now move!"

-Beacon-

Pyrrha stared at one of her partner's books without seeing it. Jaune and her partner were on a date. Doing date things. Like holding hands, kissing, ripping off each other's clothes until they're both naked and she'd start by licking-

She shook her head and tried to refocus. Blake had thrust a book into her hands and told her to read it, but the champion wasn't quite getting the point of the story. It was about a brave hero and his innocent, loving girlfriend. They've been together for years, and they make cute and innocent love once a month on their anniversary, since that's all the further the girl wants to go. She guessed that the conflict came from the boyfriend's childhood friend, who still loved the boyfriend character. The story seemed like it was at its climax, with the boyfriend seduced by the childhood friend, and the girlfriend sitting to the side watching them and masturbating.

She really didn't get what Blake was trying to tell her with this book. Was Pyrrha the childhood friend who was stealing Blake's boyfriend? The champion certainly didn't think she was acting like that. Or was Pyrrha supposed to act like that? Was it advice? A challenge? Was it a declaration that whoever was willing to fulfill Jaune's needs deserved to have him? And why was the girlfriend not doing anything!? It just didn't make sense! Though… thinking about the scene… Watching Jaune's face as he was feeling good…

The sound of her scroll ringing made Pyrrha jerk her hand away from her crotch and fumble to answer. Yang's face flickered onto the screen. "Evenin', Cereal Girl. Rin and Nora back yet, or were you just playing with yourself?"

"No, I'd never- Not without Jaune!" Yang got out an overenthusiastic laugh, almost as if she were desperate for some levity.

"Thanks P-Money. Now, I got some good news and some bad olds. Which do you want first?"

"Olds?"

"Yeah, should've known that something was up right from the start. A dorky blonde that practically screams family man, who already has a harem, and will give you anything you want if you kiss him long enough? There had to be a downside."

The sound of the door opening announced Rin's entrance. "Most people would say that the harem is the downside in that situation."

Yang's reply took a bit of an edge. "Most people are idiots that barely think about what happens after they die."

Nora's head poked out from behind Rin's shoulder. "Yang, can I have your kids when you die? Rin says I'm not allowed to have more than two, but you need seven for a Griff Ball team."

The blonde let a smile slip onto her face at the Bubbly girl's enthusiasm. "I'll let you babysit, how about that?" Nora cheered and steered her Rin steed to the fridge for celebratory pancakes.

Pyrrha felt a similar smile on her lips, but it fell when she realized there was still bad news that she had to hear. "Soo, umm, the Olds?"

The blonde bombshell sighed. "Have you felt the craving for Jaune yet? More than usual, I mean. Like your soul is telling you to throw yourself at him and promise him anything so that he'll never leave you alone again."

Nora popped back into the conversation with a bottle of maple syrup in her hands. "I feel like that whenever he isn't touching me, isn't that what love is supposed to feel like?"

Both Yang and Pyrrha stared at the girl for a second before the champion shook her head with a smile. "As weird as it sounds, I feel that way about him too. I do feel kind of restless without my nightly kiss though… I don't think I'll be able to sleep without him anymore."

The blonde shrugged. "Huh, Guess the urge to dress as a maid was just me. But the point is that Jaune is actually addicting. We'll have problems if we don't get our 'fix.' Not that I mind getting it, but I feel like it's going to make longer missions a pain."

Vell's voice came from the doorway with Cherri, Cream, and Laurelei following her. "There are workarounds that you'll find as you get closer to him. It never would have been a problem if _someone_ hadn't drained all our reserves." The faunus flopped down next to Pyrrha with a glare at Nora. "Plus, if you get addicted to him, it's your own fault. It really is your soul craving him. There's nothing in his semblance or his aura that catches you, he's just that good that you don't want to live without him. The withdrawal effects are really only your soul rebelling against your mind's thought that you can't have him right then. It just makes the payoff all the sweeter."

Yang growled at the faunus. "Not a problem? Hestia said that you can lose half your aura if we go too long without him!"

Vell waved off the brawler's concern. "That's only if you _refuse_ to go the Arc and get your fix. You're rejecting a part of your soul then. The same sort of thing happens in when you get dumped, part of your soul stays behind with the one you love. It only seems worse because the boost that comes from loving him is so great. The sort of withdrawal you'd get if you still want is much less. You'll feel weaker without his boost, and you'll definitely be distracted with your cravings, but that's the risk you take whenever you love anything."

Laurelei tossed a bottle of vanilla flavored water to the Kitsune. "Plus, it's not permanent. The deprivation makes your aura come back stronger for the strain. It's the same thing as that assignment in Beacon where they challenge you to go the whole semester without your favorite food."

Ruby's face suddenly filled the screen as the girl shook the scroll in fear. "What! They would've made me go without cookies for a whole semester! That's… Evil!"

Yang pulled her sister back away from the phone and patted her head. "Relax Ruby, they don't actually expect you give it up. It's all about secrecy and making sure that no one finds out you're cheating."

Ruby stares looked up at her sister. "Is that why you had all that chocolate in your sock drawer? I always thought it was just a reward for whoever puts your clothes away." The horrified look on Yang's face was delicious.

"Putting aside Yang's addiction to chocolate, you said you had some good news too?" Pyrrha did not want to be stuck in the middle of this conversation any longer, even if something inside of her tingled pleasantly at the thought of Jaune being addictive.

"Right, the good news. We found out where Jaune is going to be; the docks at midnight. Bring everyone. We'll take care of the White Fang and take care of our cravings."

The serious vibe was broken when some shouting from offscreen attracted Yang's attention a second before the scroll was snatched from her hands and turned to show a blonde monkey faunus in a metal collar. "You have to help me! There girls are crazy! Contact team SSSN from Haven academy,

let them know their leader is being held by criminals in Vale and to hurry up! The blonde said she was going to castrate me if I so much as breathed on her hair, the small red one has a sniper-scythe, and the faunus is going to use me to convince some Jaune guy to sleep with her!" the scroll dropped from his hands and they were treated to the sight of the boy being encased in a block of ice. The faunus got out one more instruction before the ice covered his mouth. "And tell Neptune not to flirt with the White girl, she's crazy!"

-White Fang-

Mustang flipped open his pocket watch and checked the time. _"11:57, we made it."_ The sound of military boots caused the White Fangs members to hiss and hide in the shadows of the alley. _"And here are our friends, right on time."_ A quick glance toward the new lump hiding under the Arc's cloak told him all he needed to know. " _Phase one is a success. Now for phase two…"_ Mustang stepped out of the alley and subtly blocked the two Atlas soldiers with his body. "The search of this sector has turned up nothing. Head inland."

Ironwood's men gave him a nod and a salute before heading off. He watched them go for a minute before turning back around to examine their new ally. _"… It's shorter than I thought…"_

Their new guest seemed to be a small girl with ginger hair and no concept of personal space, as she continued to snuggle into the Arc's chest despite the boy's attempts to push her away. Feeling the eyes of the group fall on her, she raised one arm and gave a greeting that was muffled by Jaune's shirt.

The blonde finally managed to create an inch of distance and turn the girl around. "Now try that again, without your face in my chest."

"Salutations! I am Penny!" She still had one arm raised in what they assumed was supposed to be some kind of awkward greeting.

"A… Human girl? Who are you? You smell funny. Why are you here? Are they tracking us?" One of the White fang soldiers pulled out his sabre and moved to threaten the girl.

The girl seemed completely ignorant of the danger she was in. "Salutations! I am Penny!"

Jaune shuffled nervously as the girl was still pushing back against his hands to get closer to him. "You already said that. I think he was asking what you're doing here."

"I was trying to evade capture and ran into you! Now I want to stay near you because it makes my aura feel good!"

Another of the White Fang thugs stepped forward. "We can't have her following us, she could be a spy! I say we slit her throat and dump the body." Blake mentally approved of the man's plan. This was supposed to be HER date.

The first thug chimed in again. "I say we gut her and burn the body!" Blake frowned at that. No, that one would smell too much.

A Third thug put in his two cents. "Aye say we put 'er in concrete shoes and let 'er sleep with the fishies!" Blake's thought process was completely derailed by the mention of fish, along with a few other feline faunus.

Meanwhile, Mustang shook his head in silent exasperation. _"They knew I wanted to use it to take down the White Fang from the inside, and they couldn't be bothered to give it any faunus traits?"_

Jaune finally stepped up to settle everyone down. "We can't just kill her, and if she was running from Altesian soldiers she probably isn't on their side." Jaune pointedly ignored the conspicuous hiccup the girl gave. "I say we take her with us." Noting the looks on the other White Fangs' faces, he scrambled for an extra justification. "If worse comes to worst, we can use her as a hostage?"

At that the masked men backed off grumbling, but Blake made sure to stay close and assure the new girl that she was being watched.

-Rooftop of Docks Warehouse-

"Okay, you've had your fun. Now can you please let me go? Or at least give me one of those blankets? Or a cup of that hot chocolate? I'm not kidding, I'm seriously cold." In all of this, Sun had never yet had the thought to close his jacket.

"You should've thought about that before you started _monkeying_ around. This is just your com- _monkey_ -ance."

"That was really strained Yang."

"C'mon, Ruby, you should know by now that that was one of the better ones. Right, Weiss?"

"I have nothing to do with this. I'm just here so I can apologize to Jaune and give him the relief he needs so he realizes he doesn't need other girls."

"Aww, so you do care about him!"

"Stop it, you bimbo! You're ruining my hair!"

The chapion stared at the commotion he teammate were making. "Ummm, won't they hear us?"

Laurelei took a sip of hot chocolate. "Don't worry about it Pyrrha, the ocean should drown it out."

Vell rose up to prove her superiority. "Says the human. Faunus have enhanced senses, remember? I'm certain that they've been trained to-"

"Nah, Addles isn't big on the whole 'vigilance' thing. He's more about charging down a path until he hits a brick wall, then moping about it for the next year. He'd probably teach them to ignore stuff like this." Cream added another container of milk to her drink, officially making more white than brown.

"Not like they're going to see us either. Those masks really limit your peripherals. Can't believe I thought they were cool." Cherri twirled her old mask on her hand.

"So what's the plan then? 'cuz I thought the plan was for you to be the distraction and then we'd hit them from behind. We do have a plan, right Vel?"

"Whay are you looking at me? Plans are always Jaune's… well, shit."

"So we don't have a plan. Marvelous. And now- wait! Shit! Hide!"

"White Fang's here already?"

"No, worse. Torchwick. And he's got a friend with a ring that is far too familiar to be good."

"Why is he here? Addles would never work with a human like him."

"Just our luck; someone competent has to ruin the party. There goes my strategy of beating up all the guys and wagging my tail like a bitch in heat. How are we supposed to deal with Trochwick and the White Fang and get Jaune without attracting too much attention?"

"It's a _burning_ question, but I think we can say that someone bigger is pulling the strings."

"Not the time Yang!"

"Seriously, can you let me go? I have to pee!"

-Docks-

Jaune stared at the criminal and his accomplice. Mustang and his immediate squad had broken off before arriving at the docks to maintain their cover, so there was no one to steal the credit. If he could capture them, then it would surely remind everyone what the Arcs truly were; Great warriors.

There were just two problems. One was Blake, whom he had to physically restrain from lashing out and attacking Torchwick, and Penny getting in his way constantly was not helping. Judging from grudging obedience that the other White Fangs grunts gave to the criminal, it would be two against an army if he let the cat have her way. The second factor was Torchwick's accomplice. He had long since learned that 'small and cute' came packaged with 'inordinately deadly' far too often. Furthermore, something about the ring on the girl's finger struck a cord with his memory. Either she snuck into Beacon and stole something without anyone noticing, or she somehow managed to steal one of the Arc rings. He wasn't sure which option was worse.

"Alright flea bags, your leader gave you to me to help get the dust you need for your revolution. Neo's already taken care of the guards, you just need to do the heavy lifting." The man sat down on a convenient crate and clapped his hands condescendingly. "Hop to it Fido, chop chop."

And that was about the time that everything began to fall apart. Blake managed to slip out of his grip and decided that the best thing to do would be to hold a master criminal at sword-point while turned around and trying to appeal to the better nature of a group of terrorists that was having none of it.

Unsurprisingly, Torchwick took exception to that treatment and repaid her rather rude greeting with a flare to her face.

That was enough of a cue for the rest of the White Fang to rush back and start a fight, but it was apparently also the cue for the girls hiding on one of the nearby rooves to abandon all pretense of restraint and stealth. Cherri led the charge against the White Fang mooks, lashing them with a whip made of her webbing and locking them with her semblance. Laurelei weighted down the group with her gravity semblance, then struck with quick precision strikes along with Ren. Hestia tore through with Nora at her side, both of them wielding hammers. Cassandra turned the unconscious faunus against their allies. Vell and Cream stayed on the roof and gave support with infinitely copied dust grenades. Navy gave air support with a bullhead that she had somehow outfitted with miniguns and a rocket launcher.

With the White Fang covered, the rest of team Javlineers, along with Penny after some prodding, joined together to fight the two-tone girl. That just left Jaune and Torchwick to have their showdown.

But first, there was something Jaune needed to know. "That ring your accomplice was wearing… are you married?"

Torchwick stumbled and almost choked on his spit. "What? No! She's my sister! Can't you see the family resemblance?"

The blonde looked back and forth between the two criminals. "Not really, no. Are you sure you weren't adopted?"

The flamboyant criminal looked mad for a second, before something clicked in his head and he started laughing. "Were you really going to go for the 'beating the red-headed step-child joke'?"

Jaune shrugged. "Hey, you fill all the boxes for someone abused in their childhood. Hardened Criminal? Check. Need to do great things and desiring recognition? Check. Fear or lack of respect for authority figures? Check. It seemed like the perfect set-up to go for that one-liner."

Roman was hunched over laughing. When he finally managed to right himself, he tipped his hat ever so slightly to the Arc. "I like you kid, Neo'd love having you for a toy. Shame at least one of us is going to end up beaten. Tell you what; when I win, I'll tell Neo to play nicely with you."

Jaune took a deep breath and braced himself for combat. "Fight then?"

Torchwick smirked and held his cane out in front of him like a sword. "Let's-" The Redhead suddenly lunged forward and fired of a flare at the knight. "FIGHT!"

Jaune blocked it with his shield then took a step back to avoid the man's follow-up cane strike. "You suck as an announcer. You're supposed to say fight before the combatants' first attack, not during."

Roman sent out a low kick. "Yeah, but I always believe in starting with a bang."

The blonde shifted his legs and caught the offending appendage. "That's what the shout is for!" he sent a stroke against his opponent's outstretched limb.

Roman pulled his leg back fast enough to avoid damage but got a cut on his shoe. "but just the shout is so cliché. It doesn't have any pizzaz! No sparkle!"

Jaune pushed the advantage with a shield bash. "It's classic! If you really wanted an explosion to start the match, then you should've fired one up in that air and started when it came down!"

The criminal caught the edge of the shield and pulled his opponent off stance. "but then I would've lost first move advantage and so much street cred. A guy like me can't be giving fair fights to every random faunus on the street. I'd never get anything done!"

The Arc transformed the stumble into a tackle. "I'm not actually a faunus, I'm Jaune Arc. The heir of the Arc family."

Torchwick was too stunned to react in time. Both fell to the ground with Jaune's sword digging into Roman's aura. "Now I'm almost sorry. Neo's been wondering why that flame bitch cared so much about that ring. If you're here the day after she stole it, then those legends really are true. I'd put you out of your misery early, but she'd never let me hear the end of it." Roman visibly shuddered. "So I guess I'll just have to surrender. Congratulations kid. You beat Roman Torchwick."

Jaune rolled back onto his feet and backed away. "You're trying to trick me. I won't fall for it."

The criminal sighed, still on the ground. "Well, there goes the easy way." In a flash he struck with the hook end of his cane and pulled the knight off his feet. "Now I have to actually fight."

The blonde twisted backwards to catch himself on his hands and was able to spring into a surprise kick that landed against his opponent's head. "C'mon, this is the season finale, your streak is coming to an end. What kind of closing would it be without a fight scene?"

Roman staggered and rubbed his jaw. "Good shot kid. You're better than your name would say."

Jaune glared at the man and sent out a lunging stab. "The Arcs are a line of great warriors!"

The older man slipped to the side of the thrust. "That's not what people remember them for."

The Arc turned his thrust into a jump that clipped the criminal with his knee. "What do you mean?"

Torchwick fired off a flare with only a second's worth of aiming. "You'll find out when you're older."

The blonde pressed into the explosion with his shield. "Tell me what you're trying to hide!"

The hook of the cane caught the boy's sword arm. "Ask Neo. She's the one that went and put a ring on it."

Jaune let the sword drop out of his hand, only to drive it into the man's knee with a kick. "Fine. But know this: Jaune Arc will bring honor to his family name as a hero!" Roman fell to the ground. The attack caught him by surprise and pierced the muscles around his kneecap. Jaune grabbed his sword and held it to the mastermind's throat. "So Yield."

The man just chuckled and gestured past the boy in front of him. "Congratulations, Hero pick your prize! You can either try to stop Neo from taking me out of here by force, fail, and get to go home with a pat on the back and the honor of having beaten Roman Torchwick. Or, you can decide to take your spoils of war and give Neo the ride of her life. You'll leave me in prison but you'll just be some philandering playboy who was in the wrong place at the wrong time. You can either catch the criminal and lose the fame, or get the fame and lose the criminal. I'd suggest taking the fame, personally. Neo's into some kinky shit."

Jaune glanced behind him and saw the six girls of Javlineers unconscious on the ground, with only Penny left to still fight the short criminal. Neo noticed his glance and responded with a wink a single moment before Penny's blade passed through her. As the illusion shattered like glass, Neo was already past the strange girl and racing for Torchwick.

There was only a single second for Jaune to make his decision. _"At least this will actually do some good, for once."_ His path chosen, he dropped his weapons, stepped into her path, and struck his best playboy pose. "Hey there, Sweet Thing. Why don't you ditch the chaperone and come play on the Arc?" Immediately after the words left his mouth, Jaune suddenly realized the toll that the fight had taken on his clothes.

Neo stopped dead and stared in disbelief at his… Bravery? Stupidity? Stupid pick-up line? Lack of clothing anywhere lower than his chest plate? Probably a combination of that last one and the revelation that he was an Arc.

Either way, it only took half a second for the girl to look him over and make her decision. With a wink to her brother and a smile that made Jaune reconsider all of his life's choices, the two were gone.

Roman just smirked. "Poor Kid. Now you're stuck with her. And now, no matter which way things go, I win. This time off is going to totally make up for having to throw that match."

Meanwhile, Sun finally managed to free himself just in time for Mustang and the military to arrive. "Thank Oum! Officer, you have to help me! There were these crazy girls and-"

Handcuffs clicked around the faunus's wrists. "You're under arrest for being a member of a terrorist organization, evading arrest, and stowing away on a vessel."

Sun looked between the handcuffs and the colonel before falling to his knees. "OUM! WHY MUST YOU TORTURE ME SO!"

Mustang gave a little grumble. "It's always the blondes…"

- **Chapter 11 Done**!-

 **-Season 1 Done!-**

Poor Sun, The next on the chopping block of eternal misfortune now that June's becoming immune to my tricks. Why do I have so much fun torturing blondes? Must be a fandom thing.

As for the story, following the tradition of great shows like "Dragon Ball (Z)" and "Naruto (Shippuden)" and "Full Metal Alchemist (Brotherhood)" [kidding on that last one, I know they're different], I have decided to split it into a different story from here on. The motivation is to change the rating to M, since Jaune will give in to the harem more, and I'm pushing the T rating as it is. So look forward to "Issues of Honor 2: Electric Boogaloo; now with 25% less confusion!"


End file.
